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Creative Writing Share your fan fiction, stories, poems, essays, editorials, song lyrics, or any other related written work. All written must be your creation. Start a new thread, and keep replying to that thread as you add on more chapters. Anyone can join in at anytime.


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  #1  
Old 02-15-2009, 07:44 AM
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Default [PG/PG-13]-Snapshot- *Chapter 1: Part 2 is up* [Please read and comment!]

*Progress*
Prologue: Look down. =/
Chapter 1: A New Mission
-Part 1
-Part 2

What's this? My first real fanfic? Oh no, we could be in major trouble here...

In all seriousness, this idea just popped into my head tonight. This story is intended to be a serious adventure with just a sprinkle of comedy thrown in for when it gets a bit intense. If it seems slow, don't fret; it will get better.

And please don't hound me about the lack of character description. Or the fact that he has no name yet. This is a first-person story, after all, and these things will come gradually. Just give it a little time. Or maybe I'm just lazy. I haven't decided yet. ;]

Anywho, I now present for your entertainment: Snapshot- the Prologue.


Snapshot
~Prologue~

I gazed out over the horizon. From my perch atop Mount Coronet, the tops of the gilded trees looked like so many waves in an ocean of red and gold. It was cold at this altitude, and the freshly fallen snow crunched under me as I shifted my weight from one foot to the other. I’d been crouched up here all day, taking many beautiful photographs for Professor Rowan.

I was waiting for that perfect shot; that moment when the sky seemed to hang, suspended, between night and day. When the sun had gone down, but the moon had not yet risen. It came, and I clicked away madly. This was the exact moment when all the bird Pokemon in the area returned to their forest perches, and the moment when all nocturnal Pokemon came out to play.

After snapping what must have been at least a thousand pictures, I removed the telephoto lens from my camera, and stored both objects inside the beige, canvas backpack I had brought with me. Satisfied with my haul for today, I rose to my feet, picked up my bag, and began to make my way down the mountain. I shivered; nighttime on Mount Coronet was chilly, and I hadn’t worn quite enough clothing for this frigid climate.

As I walked down the familiar mountain trail, my thoughts strayed to the Professor. I wondered what new and exciting projects he might be working on at this moment. The truth of the matter was that he was probably sitting in his favorite chair, sipping tea and reading the newspaper. However, I always expected him to be tinkering with something fascinating.

I had begun working as an aide to the Professor only a month earlier. I had just graduated from the Sinnoh School of Arts with a Bachelor’s degree in photography. I saw that Rowan had put an ad in the Sinnoh Times, requesting that people interview for a job at his laboratory. As I had begun to notice a severe decline in the amount of available jobs recently, I jumped at the chance. Fortunately, a skilled photographer happened to be exactly what the Professor was looking for; he wished to add pictures to his lengthy dossiers on the many Pokemon that he had seen around Sinnoh.

My first assignment had been simple enough. I was to go find and photograph three Pokemon; a Bidoof, a Starly, and a Shinx. I got the first two easily enough, but unfortunately, the Shinx I had chosen to be the subject of my final set of portraits was camera-shy. He seemed to sense the flash of the camera coming, even before it actually did. All I got were a few shots of the damn thing’s backside as it ran away. I had to spend the rest of that evening and all of the next morning trying to hunt down another worthy model. I managed to find one in the form a lovely female Shinx. It seemed to actually want to get its picture taken; it would pause and hold very still, apparently to give me an opportunity to take the photo.

When I had returned to the lab that afternoon, the Professor said that he was quite pleased with my work, and that he had a few more assignments for me, if I was up to it. I was the man for the job. As the days turned into weeks, the missions began to grow progressively harder. Rowan started requesting photos of things like Bibarel, Budew, and even Burmy. I never once failed him, and he was very generous with his rewards.

This time, the Professor had asked that I get him a picture of the Pokemon, Honchkrow. Once again, I had been successful. I had been so successful, in fact, that I felt somehow elated; as if I would now attain an even higher level of respect from Rowan. I entertained this notion for a while, not bothering to keep my mind on such trivial things as the mountain path I was treading. Or, at least, the one that I had been treading.

As I finally took notice of my surroundings, I realized that I had absolutely no idea where I was. I had managed to trek into a part of Mount Coronet that I had never seen before. It’s okay, I told myself, just retrace your steps, and you’ll be able to get back to the path just fine.

Sadly, the shifting winds that frequently gusted around this altitude on the Mount had started up. They grew so strong that my footprints were wiped away, as if by some giant eraser on a white board. Now I was not only lost, but I couldn’t see to walk any further, due to the blowing snow. As if to add insult to insanity, my nose was now strangely filled by the pungent, and unpleasant scent of Expo markers…

~ ~ ~

I feel this desperate need to explain the Expo markers thing. If you'll just refer back to the similie I used two sentences before that, it'll make a little more sense. I hope. x3

-Jake-

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Last edited by Woodchuck; 02-17-2009 at 04:12 PM.
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  #2  
Old 02-15-2009, 09:07 AM
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Default Re: -Snapshot- *Progress: Prologue*

Nice work here, Jacob! I'm sorry it took me so flippin' long to reply. x3 I was a little busy. xD

Now, it might be a really good idea to:
1. NOT write in italics. It's confusing. +_+
2. Not centre the chapters (in this case, prologue).

But apart from that, awesome writing skills, brother! Yo yo yo homie dawg!!!
Okay...sorry about that. *Clears throat and straightens invisible tie*

No typos! I really liked that simile, too! :D And also, it's fine not to describe the character if it's from his point of view. And not to give him a name, either. x3 Completely understandable!

I'll be waiting for more. And by the way, interesting topic! :D

~Xanthe.
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  #3  
Old 02-16-2009, 08:51 PM
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Default Re: -Snapshot- *Progress: Prologue*

Thanks for the feedback, Xanthe. I'll be sure not to center or italicize any more. ;]

Anyway, the first part of this next chapter is written from a 3rd Person perspective. I'll probably be switching perspectives a lot throughout this story, so be sure to keep a watchful eye out for those switches.

And now it's time for...


Snapshot
Chapter One: A New Mission

Part 1

Professor Augustus Rowan sat in his study, reading that day’s issue of The Sinnoh Times. There was an interesting article about an Orrean scientist who had discovered that catching a Pokemon with a Dusk Ball would substantially weaken it during the day. While he pondered the supportive statistics that accompanied the story, the Professor reached up to his face with his right hand and tugged on his silver mustache.

Rowan was not a young man, by any means, but he did not feel nearly as old as his appearance would suggest. His grey, permanently-ruffled hair and the lines that creased his face did nothing to betray the passion for battling that still burned within him. The blue sweater vest, white dress shirt, and black slacks that he wore told of a much quieter man than what Rowan really was. He was a trainer first, and a scientist second. He would never forget the first time he had caught a Pokemon, the first time he had shouted out orders in a fight, or the first time he had been victorious in battle.

These recollections bubbled to the surface of the Professor’s mind, and a sudden excitement surged through him. How he would love to just drop everything; forget all the research, the experiments, and the studies he had in the works, and just travel the world, battling wild Pokemon and trainers alike. He heaved a sigh. It could not be, and never would be so. The media would not give him a moment’s peace if he renounced his genius and set off on some late-life, insane adventure.

Rowan hated dealing with the media. They were sharks; bloodthirsty, cruel, and relentless. Any time anything remotely suspicious cropped up, they were there in droves, covering the story as if their lives depended on it. He thought of one reporter in particular, a man by the name of Kurt Douglass, and frowned.

Douglass was possibly one of the best reporters that Rowan had ever had the displeasure of dealing with. It was the guy’s skill that made him such a lethal informant to the public, and he was also one persistent son of a gun. Just last year, Rowan had been working on a very secret project; a project that he had no intention of revealing to the public, in case it failed. Somehow, Douglass had found out exactly what it was that Rowan was experimenting with, and he had blown the story wide open. Rowan was forced to abandon the project and to deny all claims that he had discovered a way to cheaply manufacture Master Balls.

The thought that he would be requiring Douglass’ assistance with something in the near future tortured the Professor. He would rather use someone else, anyone else, but Douglass was the obvious choice, and best suited for the task. He could get the truth about anything, and that was what Rowan needed; the truth.

A knock at the door shook Rowan from his reverie. “Come in,” he called.

His secretary stepped into the room, holding a portable telephone. “Professor, you have a telephone call. It’s quite urgent, apparently.”

Rowan carefully folded up his newspaper and set it on the end table next to his easy chair. He stood up and took the phone from the woman. She left the room, closing the door behind her. Placing the receiver to his ear, he bellowed, “Professor Augustus Rowan speaking. And you better have a damn good reason for interrupting my private time.”

“H-h-hello Professor. It’s Ch-Charlie Weatherly,” came the response from the other end.

“Oh, well hello there, my dear boy,” Rowan said, his tone lightening considerably, “Sounds like you’re in a spot of trouble. What can I do for you?”

“W-well,” said Charlie, shivering uncontrollably, “You wouldn’t happen to have a helicopter handy, would you?”

Rowan sighed, smiling piteously. Charlie had a quite a knack for getting himself into tough situations. “Just tell me where you’re at. I’ll send someone to come and get you.”

“Mount Coronet, sir. And hurry; I’m a bit too close to hypothermia for my tastes.”
~ ~ ~

Hope you enjoyed this partial chapter. I know it was pretty short, but I just wanted to introduce Rowan's character, and give a little background information. I'll try to get the next part up soon. ;]

-Jake-
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  #4  
Old 02-17-2009, 05:25 AM
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Default Re: -Snapshot- *Chapter 1: Part 1 is up*

Wow, really nice chapter! I loved your in-depth paragraphs about Rowan's past, and how he wished to have a bit of a different sort of life.
I never even knew his name was Augustus! xD (Unless you made it up or something. x3)

You must be good at English as a school subject. Am I right? Your use of metaphors were great! Really liked it. I'll be waiting for more. x3

~Xanthe.
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  #5  
Old 02-17-2009, 06:28 AM
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Default Re: -Snapshot- *Chapter 1: Part 1 is up*

Thanks for the feedback, once again, Xanthe. You seem to be the only one interested in reading this thing. IT WILL GET BETTER, PEOPLE, I PROMISE!

Anyway, I've written the next part of this chapter, so, if anyone cares, here it is.


Snapshot
Chapter 1: A New Mission

Part 2

The helicopter ride back to Jubilife city could have been called many things, and “fun” definitely wasn’t one of them. The passenger compartment was only slightly warmer than the air outside, and the uncomfortable seats made my butt go numb. I was forced to constantly shift around to keep blood flowing down to that region, which earned me many funny looks from the pilot and co-pilot. I coughed, and hugged the blankets that I was wrapped in closer to my body.

It really is lucky that the JMS runs this late, I thought, coughing again. Really, I wasn’t sure that the JMS (Jubilife Medflight Service) did run this late. In fact, I highly suspected that Professor Rowan had special influence at the hospital, owing, no doubt, to some incredible contribution he had made in the field of medical science.

The pilot glanced back at me to make sure I was still awake; hypothermia could cause a person to go into shock, which, in turn, could cause a person to lapse into a coma. “We’re gonna’ take you back to St. Jubilife’s. They’ll check you out; make sure you’re okay.”

“No,” I replied, leaning forward to be heard better over the roar of the rotary blades, “I’m fine. I need to take these pictures back to Professor Rowan. Just drop me off at his lab.”

“No can do, son,” the pilot replied, scratching his auburn, handlebar mustache, “It wouldn’t be proper procedure. Besides, you were half frozen when we found ya’. You need to be looked at. In fact, I’ll personally suggest that they examine your head! What the hell were you thinkin’ goin’ up on top of that mountain dressed like that? A t-shirt and jeans ain’t gonna’ do nothin’ against subzero conditions.”

“I just didn’t expect it to get that cold, that’s all.” I frowned. Who was he to judge me? “Looks like you’d have plenty of protection, though,” I said with a smirk, staring at the man’s ample gut. He chuckled.

“I like you, kid. You’re fiery. Tell you what; next time some half-assed notion takes you up that mountain in street clothes, we won’t trouble ourselves with a trip out here. Sound good?”

He had me there. They probably didn’t like having to come and get me any more than I liked being stuck up there.

“So,” the pilot said, glancing back again, “What exactly were you doing up there?”

“I told you, I was taking pictures,” I said looking down at my bag. It wasn’t zipped, and my camera could be seen lying on top of everything else. “The Professor hired me as his photographer. He says I’ve got a real knack for it.” Hey, a little bragging never hurt anyone.

“You must have if you’re willing to freeze your ass off to get a good picture. See anything interesting?”

“Yeah,” I replied, thinking back, “I got some nice photos of a flock of Honchkrow. There were some real weird-looking Butterfree too. They weren’t puple. More of a pink color.”

“I’ve heard that can happen sometimes. Somethin’ to do with bad genes, I figure. Me? I prefer the normal ones to the weirdos any day.”

“There’s nothing wrong with being different!” I said indignantly, “It just makes you unique. And that’s a good thing in my book.”

The pilot merely shrugged and adjusted the controls. I knew that, because of his dark-tinted goggles, his eyes had failed to see what so many others hadn’t. I had been born with two eyes, like any other person, but one of them stayed partially closed at all times. Most people were under the assumption that I had been hit during a fight, but that idea still didn’t stop the stares that they gave me. This was part of the reason I had decided to get into photography. I used my “disabled” eye to look through the viewfinder. Since most people seemed to be pretty impressed with my beautiful photos, it proved to them that my eye could still function well, even if it did look odd.

“How long until we land?” I shouted.

“We’ll touch down in just a minute here. City’s comin’ up; you’ll see it if you look out your window.”

I did as instructed. For a few moments, I saw nothing but darkness, but then, as we crested a large hill, apparently, I saw the twinkling lights of Jubilife City. Normally a huge and awe-inspiring metropolis, the city looked strangely diminished from this altitude. Now there was nothing to do but sit back, relax, and wait until we hit solid ground.

~ ~ ~

I really like the pilot character. I think I'll try and fit him back into the story somehow. He's just priceless. Anyway, hope you enjoyed this installment! :]

-Jake-
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Last edited by Woodchuck; 02-17-2009 at 07:05 AM.
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  #6  
Old 02-17-2009, 07:18 AM
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Default Re: -Snapshot- *Chapter 1: Part 2 is up* [Please read and comment!]

Haha, lol. He's got a unique character, I gotta admit. x3

Nice chapter! It's good. I found a few mistakes:

1. You don't need to put apostrophes on things like: "ya" and "gonna", considering they don't have to have any letter you need to replace it with. ...I think that sentence is confusing me, but I hope it makes sense. xD

2. Right here:
“So,” the pilot said, glancing back again, “What exactly were you doing up there?”
You can't have a capital where it's in bold, seeing as you had a comma after "so".

But anyways, nice part two! :D Good to see your writing is very good again. :D
It'll be interesting to see where this goes!

~Xanthe.
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  #7  
Old 02-17-2009, 06:13 PM
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Default Re: [PG/PG-13]-Snapshot- *Chapter 1: Part 2 is up* [Please read and comment!]

nice plot. this the most non-boring fan fic i've ever read. i hope this keeps going!
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