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Creative Writing Share your fan fiction, stories, poems, essays, editorials, song lyrics, or any other related written work. All written must be your creation. Start a new thread, and keep replying to that thread as you add on more chapters. Anyone can join in at anytime.


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  #301  
Old 12-08-2009, 07:30 PM
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Default Re: Through the Eyes of a Flareon ~ [PG: 13+]

I really liked it but you still are writing right!? Don't stop!!!
I personally think you should end this story soon.

PS: i have read all of your threads and are your fan.
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  #302  
Old 12-10-2009, 03:34 AM
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Default Re: Through the Eyes of a Flareon ~ [PG: 13+]

Lol, it's been a long time since I got a comment here. xD

Thank you very much, and yes I am still writing it! :D It's just that I'm working on so many different things and I lose motivation for different stories and gain them again sometime later, and at the moment this story is going slow because I'm not really motivated. And as much as Dusty nags me to, I can't just open the Word doc and keep writing... I do want to, but it'll probably be a while yet. Excuses, excuses.

Oh? Why's that? I guess a lot has happened already, which is why you think so? I don't plan on having it too much longer, but I can't be sure how much longer it'll be before the story comes to an end. :3

Thanks! :D *hugs* That means a lot to me! ^^

~Xanthe.
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  #303  
Old 12-12-2009, 12:56 AM
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Default Re: Through the Eyes of a Flareon ~ [PG: 13+]

Kinda like me and Jacker, huh? We lose motivation.
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  #304  
Old 01-15-2010, 03:25 AM
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Default Re: Through the Eyes of a Flareon ~ [PG: 13+]

Quote:
Originally Posted by riolu42 View Post
Kinda like me and Jacker, huh? We lose motivation.
Pretty much. ^^;

O SORRY I HAVEN'T POSTED A CHAPTER SINCE LAST YEAR.

Anyway, weird turn of events--the chapter I have been writing since the last one was supposed to have one particular something happen in it, but what I did was I wrote too much before it, so when I actually got up to the main happening I didn't have enough pages, I guess, to write it. And by that I meant by the end of writing the chapter it might have taken up four or five posts, which I figured was a little over the top. xD So instead I cut it short and put the main thing in another chapter which will probably be short (like, one and a half posts of something), and then I'll get to the next chapter. It's kinda good news for you and me, because you'll get to read the chapter now when I put it up and it means that I will have more chapters to the story (which benefits me xD). I like chapters. YAY. Anyway, I'll post it now. xD Just thought you'd like to know! Sorry if this chapter is kinda boring and drags on like the chapter title suggests... But I just couldn't bring myself to delete any part of it to fit the main thing in. Dx And sorry, no picture just yet to go with this one... D: Finished! 8D

-------
Chapter Fourteen: Travelling Just Drags On


Zhol and I had made our way north for two or so days since I had met up with her after the politoed incident. At certain stages we would come across various pokémon who attacked us for territorial among other reasons, avoiding other unwelcome parties, but we were still a while away from her home. And despite my great skill, I, for some reason, was unable to catch any prey at all...and Zhol had been getting all our food instead. For variety we ate some of the berries I managed to bring back nearly most nights. Eventually we had covered a wide expanse of land and we were both somewhat confident we would reach her colony within several days if we stuck to the right path – and with my sense of direction it was likely – and didn’t take too long when we stopped for breaks.

“Ugh...hungryyy...” I complained as we sat down, belly rumbling. Zhol was probably hungry as well, but knowing her, she’d be the last pokémon to complain. I tore a leaf from nearby off its twig and began to chew, but I spat it out straight afterwards, shaking my head as if in an attempt to rid my tastebuds of the bitter flavour. “Lehck,” I reacted, pulling a paw up to my face and licking it to kill the taste. “Even my fur tastes better...”

The sneasel let out a barely audible sigh as she sat with her paws set in front of her with her legs spread lazily, her back straight against the boulder behind her. Apparently she wasn’t hungry, or if she was, she wasn’t letting the world know...unlike me. She closed her eyes and lay down, noting that the shaded sky was a good indication of the time. I knew that was how it was supposed to be as well, but without food...it would take me forever to fall into an unconscious state. ‘Who goes to bed on an empty stomach?’

As a result, I forced myself to get up and search for something to satisfy myself with. “Zhol...I’m just gonna go for a stroll,” I notified, and she responded by sliding her eyelids up about two centimetres and then returning them. “Heh, heh,” I began, “I just rhymed unintentionally.”

***

It hadn’t been long when I stopped for a break. Kicking up soil in a frustrated manner, I slumped myself onto the earth and huffed. Why was there nothing to eat around here? No prey, no bushes with fruit... All I could do was nibble on leaves... LEAVES! ‘This is getting ridiculous...’ I thought angrily. ‘There’s always a bush with some sort of fruit...’ However, complaining wasn’t going to get me anywhere... “But still!”

I got to my paws again and began to make my way agitatedly back to where Zhol was, knowing – but still secretly hoping otherwise – that on my path back there wouldn’t be any food sources I had missed the first time I walked past them.

I could hear hoots and crickets as I continued through the darkness. Although I liked it, it was better when there was someone with me... But I pushed aside the thought. Or I tried. My mind wandered back to when Izante would accompany me wherever I padded... She’d be right beside me, laughing at one of my jokes and calling me crazy while our trainers were dawdling behind with each other.

I halted. It suddenly dawned on me. “Our masters were together... Izante’s master and mine...together... But if...if Izante’s a Rocket pokémon, then doesn’t that mean...her trainer is too?” My eyes grew wider and I clenched my jaws. “They might still be together now...” I began to ponder another possibility, as well... A possibility that I hadn’t come across before. “What if she...” I muttered, looking down. “What if her trainer wasn’t a Rocket? Maybe she... She could have joined Team Rocket while on the ship so she could escape. That...that stupid cat could have persuaded her... And it makes sense as to why she couldn’t...help me.” I cringed at the memory as I let my eyes twinkle across the ground’s surface, reconsidering. “No,” I grunted, “impossible. There’s no way they would have let her join so suddenly. Surely they would have to undergo some sort of test or training or whatever...” The plausibility of her master not being on the Rocket’s side seemed minimal, which only led me to believe he was the one who started it and Izante was forced into it as a pup. “Holy Moltres...” I visualised several images of my trainer in multiple situations where she was at the mercy of my ex-friend’s master, each predicament twisting painfully in my mind. “No!” I shouted, stressing my toes. However, I stopped to think. Master was smart. If she had raised me to be as smart as I was, then obviously she had to be responsible for some if not all of it. But...but what if she had been fooled? What if he led her into an alleyway in a dreary city on a blackened night and...and...

Catching me off guard, crunching leaves echoed from behind—to the west. I threw my gaze about, unable to spot whatever was making the noise, but it was obviously something distant which was drawing nearer. It was too far away and obscured by the trees between us for me to spot it – let alone identify it – and through the scattered, branchless-until-high-up trees, one would assume that it would be an easy task. And yet the darkness was lowering my sight’s accuracy for one and there were many slopes throughout the forest which happened to be skilled at concealment.

I felt the need to hide, but without much cover whatsoever, it was hard to find a spot. Any shrubs – which were less than common – were not plentiful enough to provide protection and the trees were too thin for me to dart behind. They were also too spaced out for me to use more than one at the same time, so unless I could divide myself into two, a skill I was sure would be handy at times, there wasn’t much of a hope. ‘Even though it would be cool...’ I shook my head, thinking that it wasn’t the time to be fantasising about things I was unable to do, and kept trying to come up with a solution. With the presumable pokémon closing in, I didn’t have much time. ‘I could run,’ I thought, but reconsidered once I confirmed that I was keen on finding out what it was. By the sounds of its pawsteps it was large, but then again I couldn’t be sure.

Figuring I would be kept at a safe distance but I would still be able to see it, I dashed behind a tall trunk and barely had to wait until something furry came over a slope. It was taking enormous strides and it reached my place within seconds of when it was slipped into my view. I couldn’t make out what it was because of its pace and the blurred darkness, but whatever its species...it was far larger than me.

The quadruped raced past with blinding speed, and I was amazed (and thankful it didn’t bother to stop and...injure or eat me). However, I widened my eyes at something I caught a glimpse of before it passed... There was something...on its back...that was pointing at me. ‘Pointing,’ I repeated in my head, ‘like humans do.’ It took me another second to consider the thought of, even though I found it confusing and strange, a human actually being what was on its back. But by that time the pokémon was gone and the alleged passenger was no longer visible. It had disappeared as quickly as it had come.

“Oh well. I’m too tired to worry about it,” I muttered, trotting back to Zhol’s sleeping spot a while later. “I should get some sleep...” I walked to the rock behind Zhol and climbed on top of it. It was smooth and had few spots of moss in little patches. I sat down, drawing my four legs in towards my body and wrapping my tail around my back two. I set my head on my paws, but my ears remained rather erect. I gave a sigh and shut my eyes, letting my mind settle in preparation for a long, well-deserved sleep.

***

“Where are we supposed to start looking?” asked a figure that sighed with agitation. The tiny light coloured pokémon seemed to avoid being touched by slimy reeds leaning over next to him.

“I don’t know...” another one replied, looking disappointed and almost sad about the fact.

“Is this the place?” questioned the first form. A third pokémon bent over and skimmed a white glove-like hand over pawprints.

“It’s where we were told they were,” the one who had spoken second – a stout green pokémon walking on four legs – confirmed. He too glanced about, scanning the area with his triangular eyes. Two fangs stuck out from below the two nostrils he used once lifting his head to scent the air. Leaves and a closed bud on his sloping body wobbled as he zipped between nearby trees; he was sure he spotted a lead. “This way,” he suggested, and the other two pokémon followed. They passed many trees on their way through, stamping marks in the dirt as they went, and finally spotted a collection of small charred logs. As the trio approached the remains of a resting place, two of them smirked. Ash sprinkled the wood, and four feathers with traces of blood on one were on the ground near their feet. Pawprints dotted the sandy dirt, and there were bigger circles where pokémon would have once sat as well as a faint scent.

“It appears we’ve found their campsite,” the tallest of them all pointed out. He neared the collection of logs and bent his thin pink, white knee-capped legs to touch the coals. He wasn’t expecting them to be hot at all, and his assumption was confirmed as he held one easily in his white gloved hand. He inclined his pink head to the left and then his right, addressing both his colleagues, and grinned maliciously.

***

“Dusty,” whispered Zhol, “wake up.”

“Mrmh-hurm-hurm,” I uttered, eyes still closed.

“Get up,” she hissed with impatience.

Lazily I opened my eyes as I realised my head was hanging off the rock. The moment I gained sight, a sharp nose – and glare – was staring down at me. “WAHH!” I squealed, scrambling from my awkward sleeping position to a seated one with my defences raised. It must only have been an hour or two later than when I had fallen asleep because it was still dark. We had company this time. “Uh, wh—...” I leaned closer to Zhol, my grogginess nearly causing me to tip. She stood right in front of the rock I had slept on and seemed to be looking sternly at a shaggy figure. She didn’t move, but since I had my muzzle inches from her right ear, I knew she could hear me. “Who are they?” I began gazing around with my eyes as my head remained close to the sneasel’s face, breathing slowly. By the way they had us surrounded, I was sure they weren’t sticking around to play.

“Why,” murmured a grass type double my height, “do you trespass?”

“...We do not trespass to cause trouble,” Zhol calmly replied, her eyes serious and firm. “We are passing through.”

“Nonsense!” snapped the pokémon, reacting with his whole body. “Too common is that response! And too often does it prove to be a lie!” His blanket-like mane of grey settled on his back after being tossed about while the three leaves on the end of each arm also calmed.

I expected Zhol to react with a yelled sentence of her own, but she inhaled and held her steady gaze. “Excuse me, mister shiftry,” I intervened, and his piercing glare almost threw me off the rock. I took a moment to continue... “We were just leaving, so...” I dropped from the rock and flashed a phoney smile and a quick stretch. “Thanks for the hospitality. It was a pleasure to meet you all!” I strode over-gleefully off in the direction we’d be heading, but two nuzleaf stepped in my way, closing off the space between them. I kept a small, pretend smile. “‘Scuse me!” But the grass and dark types narrowed their eyes and held up a hand each in an offensive stance with their other hand drawn back. Zhol shook her head disapprovingly while the shiftry stared intently at me. “Okay! Sorry!” I said in an annoyed fashion. I could have been talking to either the shiftry and his crew or Zhol—both, I figured.

“Sneasel,” began the shiftry in a rusty voice, dragging on the word. Zhol’s eyes switched to his. “Your kind does not live in these areas,” he mused, suspicion written all over his face. “Are you not an outsider? Do you wish to pass through for a valid reason? Or is it you come here as spies?!”

“We’re going t—”

Zhol snapped her head in my direction, her eyes wide and her message clear—she definitely wanted me to shut up. I submitted willingly, folding my lips in. The dark and ice type’s head slowly moved back to the direction her body was facing. The shiftry only seemed more impatient. “I, Zhol, sneasel of the Usster Colony to the north, am journeying home.”

‘...Usster Colony, hey? Hmm... I wonder what kind of pokémon she lives with...’

“Where is it you come from? Hunting? You are not north enough to be on a simple hunting trip!”

I first thought he was asking where she was from again right after he had already asked. ‘Uhh, she just said, ding-dong,’ I had thought with sarcasm, but when I realised what he meant, I was the one sounding dumb.

“You must be Rokont spies!” he howled, and his gang of nuzleaf tensed and became both uneasy and angered.
I drew my head back, my face encompassed with a frown. ‘...Ro...kont?’ But that became the least of my worries as I realised these pokémon could spring any second and take us out. Due to that, I readied myself in case I needed to loose a stream of fire.

“A ship,” Zhol stated coldly. “We came from...a human ship.” Several blinks of surprise flashed on each nuzleaf’s face, and I scanned their group, noticing how shocked they all were. It was odd to see the sudden change in their attitudes.

The shiftry growled. Obviously he didn’t like the sound of that. “A human ship, you say?”

Zhol responded first with a nod. “Team Rocket’s ship.”

Sharp breath intakes made me aware of these pokémon’s familiarity with the organisation, and I had to wonder how popular they were. I heard two to three names being exchanged between members of the nuzleaf gang, and the shiftry’s posture weakened a little.

But suddenly he perked up again, catching our attention. “I have had kin who were pokénapped by those vile monsters and never returned!” The pokémon stepped forward a pace. “If you are lying, I will show you no mercy. What is your proof?!”

“Shiftry,” I started, stepping beside Zhol as if to back her up. I swallowed. “Have you seen a Rocket up close?”

He narrowed his eyes. “Zhol – sneasel of the Usster Colony to the north – who is this?”

Zhol was stumped at this according to her reaction – or lack-there-of – and I realised I was the only one besides Izante who knew about my history. Despite this though, she had a go. “She is...Dusty, flareon of another land.” To ‘another land’ the shiftry appeared uneasy, but Zhol didn’t allow him to get a word in. “She was the rescuer of every captured pokémon...on that vessel. Had it not been for her, many pokémon would not have escaped and many more of them would be dead.”

I shrugged, holding an “oh, shucks” look on my face. The nuzleaf evolution looked more convinced, but I could tell he wasn’t going to stop there.

“She also fought off a possessed beast for the safety of other pokémon.”

“As I have asked, what is your proof?” he shouted to silence his minions as they began quietly muttering after Zhol’s explanation. “You,” – he looked at me – “were asking me this why?”

“Oh!” I realised I hadn’t finished. “Well...have you seen one up close?” He sneered and answered in the affirmative. “Then did you happen to see...what they’re equipped with?” I asked in a serious manner. The shiftry obviously had seen what they carried, because he flinched as soon as I mentioned it. The wicked image of when I had first seen Zhol returned to my head, and it hurt me to let it resurface on purpose. “Well, if you want proof—!”

I bent my head down at Zhol’s right hip, pointing with my nose to a mark on her body where something had singed her fur and left a burn on her skin. The shiftry gasped, staggering backward. He gathered that a pokémon couldn’t have done this—especially in the shape it was, and it looked more like an electricity wound than one caused by fire.

“The Team Rocket taser is a handheld weapon carried by humans who do the bidding of Team Rocket’s leader. This device shoots electrical currents through the subject’s bodies to make them seize up and become incapacitated via two prongs of metal—hence the two-dotted mark it left. This was used on poor Zhol because she was trying to fight for her freedom!” I almost became angry with all the motivation my explanation was gathering. “And if that’s not proof enough, then...well, surely you would know of guns.” I turned so my left side was facing the grass and dark type so he could see, and it must have only then set in that we were telling the truth. “I was shot by a human for finding freedom and helping other pokémon.” I bent my head down, letting my wounded ear come into view to clarify it again. I waited a pawful of seconds before returning myself, and I began to analyse the shiftry, who seemed more believing.

“Hm,” he grumbled, looking away. “...Do not underestimate the forest as you may have done your freedom task.” He changed his position, standing with his back to us. He turned his head so we could see the side of it. “May your journey be safe.” I knew he was trying to be nice, or perhaps even sympathetic, and I appreciated the effort.

In a matter of seconds the long-nosed pokémon and his gang were bounding between branches off in the direction I was facing, and I smiled. We had been able to convince a pokémon of the forest—a nice change from the pokémon we had been running into lately who wanted to challenge us without reason.

Continued in next post...
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Last edited by Graceful_Suicune; 08-29-2012 at 07:11 AM.
  #305  
Old 01-15-2010, 03:27 AM
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Default Re: Through the Eyes of a Flareon ~ [PG: 13+]

“We should get going,” she mentioned, and I blinked at her, a little dumbfounded.

“Why?” I glanced to the rock I had slept on. “We barely slept!”

The sneasel closed her eyes and took a moment to breathe. “We are not well tolerated in this area. I would advise that we keep moving so we don’t overstay the little welcome we have.”

“Alright...” I grew a look of exhaustion as she walked in front of me, her right side in my face before she took off. “W-wait! Slow down, will ya?” I had to catch up, so I began sprinting after her. But, being so early in the morning, I couldn’t quite get a grip on a proper speed and my limbs failed to move properly after a stiff sleep. “But wait! What about my sleep? I get cranky if I don’t get enough sleep!” However, she didn’t seem to care much for that. “Hey—will you wait up?” I growled, slowing down to a stop with a grouchy expression. “Fine,” I said under my breath, huffing a wisp of fire. “Stupid nocturnal...partly.” I eyed a spot of grass at the base of a common tree since rocks were less than abundant and strode over to it with slow steps. I was tired and hungry. ...And annoyed. ‘Why can’t she just agree for once and listen to me?’ But as soon as I sat down, a sudden hoot made me jump. I froze in the instant and began feeling...a little lonely.

“Hoo, hoo...”

I skimmed the leaves visually, trying to filter out any pokémon that would explain the sounds, but all I captured was rustling clumps of canopy and the noise of fluttering wings. My breathing’s pace increased, and I began swallowing frequently. My fur fluffed and I became completely still while my ears awaited the next sound. Suspicious hooting and chuckling rang in the small space I had created around me, and I finally regretted having not followed that darn sneasel. I also came to realise that only then, when I was alone, I started to be freaked out by this common and harmless audio...

I squeaked as something sharp poked the back of my leg, and I leapt forward and spun around. However, I identified the predator as...a stick. “Great. Now the twigs are preying on me...”

“HOOO!!!!”

“Eep!” I seemed to shrink as I tried not to listen to the taunting pokémon around me, but I knew I couldn’t stay frozen and cowering for long. “...Okay, alright,” I sighed quietly, “I’m coming already...” I bravely uncurled and turned around, unable to see far into the dark distance—meaning I couldn’t see Zhol. I didn’t hear her footsteps, either, which made me bite my lip. “D’aw,” I whined, finding the courage to bolt through the darkness the same way Zhol vanished. ‘Funny,’ I mentioned to myself. ‘You can stand up to a possessed garchomp several times your height, but you can’t confront the darkness on your own with a straight face? Hah!’

I travelled for only a few minutes, zooming through the scenery with multiple thoughts on my mind. “Zhol!” I exclaimed, targeting the dark silhouette standing on what looked like the end of the path. My paws trampled hundreds of twigs and leaves as I continued to run, and the ice and dark type whirled around, slipping a claw to her lips vertically. I was aware of the rushing current I could hear a short ways away, and since she was standing on the edge of a padded (because of the thick blanket of foliage) cliff, I assumed that there was a wide river resting far below.

She seemed to be annoyed with me, and at a guess I assumed it was because I hadn’t been able to keep up and chose to remain behind. But it wasn’t my fault! She shouldn’t have run off on me when I was still tired.

I exhaustedly padded towards her once my pace faded into a tired hobble, and every breath was a pant. “Thanks...for waiting...” I managed to sarcastically say before collapsing onto the forest’s floor in front of her, several multi-shaped leaves rising and floating back down again. I could have drifted off within mere minutes had Zhol let me, but she signalled silently for me to stand beside her. I rolled my eyes and slipped out a sigh backed with agitation, stepping next to her.

“I wasn’t smart to leave you by yourself,” she admitted straight off, and I flattened my mouth.

“True, true,” I said while nodding, my eyelids only half open.

She turned back to what was in front of her, and only then did I see it. A river as wide as I had imagined was running downstream in a rightward direction down below, and in a few places it snaked into different ways. The land that continued stretched into the distance was on the same level as the river—therefore making the cliff we were standing on the highest ground for many kilometres. Of course, there were cloud-reaching mountains in the distance that looked like they would take weeks more to reach that were far taller than the land we had been travelling on, but that didn’t count.

Off to our left was the same cliff that we were on which extended until it curved around and kept going in the direction we had been heading, and I could see that not too far away it began sloping down and probably stopped doing so as it reached the rest of the land’s level. The cliff had created a waterfall which fell to keep the river from stopping, bouncing and rolling off the giant stones jutting from the cliff face. One of the ways the river after the waterfall turned off in was in the direction we were headed, toward the mountains, and it basically followed the land that began slanting a few metres away from it. I might have been able to pick out more detail had it been lighter, but it was bright enough (courtesy of the glimmering stars which stroked the world with their shining touch) to make out the path ahead.

“That’s lovely and all,” I began, turning my head to the left, “but...can we sleep now, please? I’ll promise to admire it properly in the morning and give you a melodramatic reaction.”

Zhol took a breath, running her claws laxly down a tree’s trunk her right paw was on and met my gaze as she faced me. She was about to comment, but nodded instead, holding back a smile I knew would have come if she hadn’t been as aware of it.

“Score!” I whispered, slumping down immediately and curling up.

The sneasel turned and wandered to a tree a few metres back with a rather wide trunk and I watched as she, her back to me and on the other side of the tree, took a seat and crossed her arms. It was smart to be on watch; she was facing the forest where the more likely source of predators would come... Plus, bigger trunks meant more width which led to more comfort. It also looked like a great place for me to curl up at, and...the water nearby began to get to me. And although I could still hear it after I got to my legs and wearily walked paces back, I was happier to be right next to my travelling buddy. And besides, it was further away from the liquid. I rested my head on my paws and wrapped my fluffy tail around my side. [/i]‘...Zhol nearly smiled. That’s both a good and rare sight.’[/i] I relaxed myself, happy to be allowed more sleep. But the thought of the dark and ice pokémon wanting to rise and shine early made me groan on the inside. That could wait till it actually happened.

***

I woke to a start as a leaf split in two. My ears flew directly up and I shot to my paws. A pokémon’s eyes darted to mine, and I sleepily squinted. ‘Just a pidgey,’ I thought. [/i]‘Wait... Breakfast!’[/i] I bolted towards it under the direction of my stomach as they took to the air after cooing uncomfortably. “Come back! I just wanna eat you!” I taunted. I found it very convenient that the bird pokémon didn’t fly through the roof-like leaves protecting me from the sun’s rays, but along an obvious path of straight ahead. Luckily the way we were moving wasn’t the way to the edge of the cliff, but in the direction it ran—towards the waterfall. I almost began drooling as I neared it, and I could feel my teeth about to nip its wings, but I could tell the flying type was petrified.

At first a spot appeared wherever my eyes looked, but rapidly my vision began to darken. I was alarmed and immediately tumbled over my paws, collecting droppings and dirt as I rolled. I shrieked, confused as I could no longer see. ‘A pokémon attack?!’ I suspected, but my thoughts temporarily disbanded as I skidded to a stop in a strange position, my body aching of scratches from stones. Something had reopened my leg muscle wound by the feel of it, but I was unable to confirm since I was blinded! “Z-Zhol!” I called awkwardly, staying completely still in fear of something happening. Although it didn’t hurt, my head felt like it was spinning and being squeezed. I blinked several times, panting heavily...and the blackness slowly leaked from my head. I blinked three more times, finding that by the end of the period my sight was almost completely clear. I waited a moment before slowly untangling myself. My head cautiously patrolled my surroundings, but nothing was out of the ordinary. I could no longer hear the pidgey’s flapping wings, but food was off my mind. Sensing everything was fine, I lifted myself up, looking around another time.

“Dusty!” a frantic voice hissed, and I whipped my head around as a speedy sneasel entered from behind me.

“Z-Zhol! Stop!” I ordered, and I noticed her concerned expression as she abruptly followed my request, a fair distance between us. She obviously wanted answers, as anyone would, but I took a few seconds to keep talking. “There’s...” I continued, glancing around again. “There’s something out here.” Zhol’s head cocked to one side, and I imitated her as she tossed her gaze about to confirm my words. She scented the air as I watched her for a response, but once she finished she returned her eyes to me.

“I smell forest, you and me, and river,” she said. “Bird scents linger, and several other pokémon’s, but that is all besides other natural wild smells. Can you not smell for yourself?” she asked with wonder to her tone.

“Yeah, but...” I hastily trotted over to her, suspiciously checking all directions as I went. “I was blinded!” I whispered in a serious manner, her response multiple blinks. “Something fogged my vision with darkness!”

She didn’t need long to have a change of expression, and the perplexity in her face subsided. “Tell me what you did,” she asked. I understood why; if I made too much noise or something I could have woken up a grumpy forest resident. One who could have felt an obligation to punish me.

“Well, I woke up to a pidgey nearby which made me jump. At first I didn’t care, but then I thought that it might have been a good menu item and so I chased after it, but not long into my run, black colouring suddenly crept into my view and I couldn’t see! ...And then I fell over.” I remembered my injury and turned my head over my left shoulder to see its damage. The scab had been removed, so it was bleeding and it hurt. I looked back to her as she crossed her arms and spoke again.

“You...got up the moment after you woke up and began running?” she confirmed, and I paused, then nodded. “Was it painful?”

“Yes!” I replied straight away, and she grew a light frown. However, it vanished after she heard my next comment. “Well...not that much since it was only stones and sticks, but...” I met her eyes again, and realised she was asking about the sight thing. “Oh—the blindness didn’t hurt, but my head went all weird...but that didn’t hurt either. Just felt strange.”

Zhol sighed, beginning to walk past me in the same direction I had been chasing the pidgey—the way we needed to go. I shouted after her, asking her what her she thought it was and where she was going, and she stopped to turn her head as I caught up. “Blood.”

“...Blood?” I wondered.

“Yes. As you lie, your blood pools in certain places in your body and doesn’t circulate as effectively as if you’re standing, so when you get up too quickly after being in a lying position for long enough, the blood rushes to your head, causing dizziness and blackened vision,” she explained. I nodded, taking it all in.

“So...it wasn’t a pokémon attacking me?”

Zhol probably wondered why I had thought that in the first place, but she shook her head. “Be more careful next time. Okay?” She waited a moment and then continued ahead. I followed, leaping twice to catch up.

“Well, come to think of it, it’s happened to me a few times before. I never really got a chance to ask anyone about it.” Interested, I wanted to know more. “But, Zhol—it doesn’t happen often.”

She sighed, probably presumed we were done with the topic, and said, “It’s due to low blood pressure. And since you haven’t eaten properly in more than two days, that would also be a cause.”

“Uurgh, don’t remind me,” I complained, feeling my stomach whine at me. I told it to shut up.

I heard several screeches and other bird-like calls waver as they weaved through the air, filling all ears listening in nearby. Accompanying it was the soft swaying of the leaves and the rushing current of the river—all natural sounds. Unlike when we were on the ship; the audio there was the humming of the vessel’s engine, the mournful cries of pokémon distraught or dying, the crashing waves keeping the ship afloat and the noise of pure fear. Cold, hard fear. A fear that I had never sensed or witnessed before...

The ongoing current nearby recaptured my attention. I widened my eyes. “...HOLY MILTANK!” I yelped, bounding across to the cliff’s face and looking out at the scenery first before staring down. The water sparkled under the sunlight and the view spanning for kilometres was fantastic. The assorted trees danced as their branches reached for the high flying bird pokémon, the clouds watching down from the turquoise sky. It was truly a sight to behold. “ZHOL! This is magical... I can’t believe a place like this exists!” I was half serious and half acting, as I promised her a proper reaction when I woke up, but it was true that this place looked better when it was light.

Zhol nodded, leaning against a trunk with her arms crossed. Even though she wasn’t a happy and bouncy pokémon, she was appreciative of things worthwhile. Not that the two were obviously connected, but it was nice to see her in a situation that she was content about. And seeing her reaction, I wondered if she lived in a place like where we were and what we could see. It was either that or, being a sneasel, she lived in a frosty area cold and ice type-like and rarely got to see sights such as this one.

Reminding me of something I had been meaning to ask her regarding her living environment, once we were back on track I cleared my throat. “Hey, Zhol,” I began, not waiting for a reply, “you never told me what your colony was like.” She kept her eyes on our path as we stepped around holes and the occasional branch, seeming to think. Specifying, I continued, “Like...what kind of pokémon are part of it? Species, I mean. Is it mixed? Or...”

She craned her neck, swaying her arms subtly as her claws met and then parted. “The Usster Colony is a clan of pokémon from around the lands... Some came there for specific reasons and for others, it was random.”
“How did you wind up living with them? Don’t sneasel usually reside in icy plains...or something?”

From the moment I asked the question I knew I had chosen the wrong questions. Zhol’s fists curled and tensed and her legs froze. Her face turned to that of a hurt and sorrowful expression—one I didn’t often see from not only her, but anyone. She kept her glare fixed on a twig as I first thought to meet her eyes but quickly decided that would prove troublesome, so instead I stayed where I was, a step ahead of her, my gaze at the ground as well. The sneasel took a breath but didn’t remove her stare. “Dusty...have I been fair and willing to talk to you whenever you asked something?”

I broke from where I was looking to change locations, but she didn’t rise to meet me. “Uh-uh...yeah?”

“Then it should be reasonable to say I can’t talk on behalf of this one particular matter,” she uttered, a tinge of hostility to her words. I feared it was directed at me and lowered my tone.

“O...okay. Y-uhh...” I was unsure of what to say, but Zhol stepped forward and continued walking, so it was clear that all I had to do was follow. “Hey...Zhol,” I started. I expected her to stop, but she kept going. “...Sorry. I didn’t know it was...something you’d—”

“Dusty.” She halted, this time allowing me to grab her eyes. “...It’s alright.” She shuffled through the leaves as I stayed on the spot for a moment and frowned.

‘...It... It is?’

Eventually we reached the end of the cliff before it turned to our right. The waterfall’s before-river had a rapid flow prior to tumbling off the edge, creating the very plentiful cascade. It was loud and threatening—I don’t know how so many pokémon could think that the sound was soothing. A beautiful sight? It spat on me and beckoned for me to fall and have my head hammered in under the might of its crushing weight. Refreshing? To jump in there would wreck my coat as well as extinguish any brewing fire. ‘I’ll never understand the fascination with water...’

We crossed it with a few precautions by using rocks lodged in the bottom of the water as stepping stones. I almost slipped at one point and accidentally dipped my tail into it, so the end of it was wet. Yay. But after that it was pretty simple: we moved on down the slope accompanying one of the rivers that branched off from the main one and continued to follow it through more forest.

That part of the forest was much less dry than where we had previously been, and moss was rather copious and grew almost everywhere it could. We saw more pokémon—a few more water types like goldeen and remoraid in the waters and spotted a cluster of combee buzzing about an enormous oak tree with probably enough space for a giant hive. Pachirisu were common amongst large tree and were often able to be spotted in groups of three before scurrying out of sight again. Other insect-like pokémon such as caterpie and weedle popped up in places as well, often using the same method as the pachirisu. It wasn’t very welcoming that nobody was there to even give us a warm ‘hello’. Sneasel and flareon never normally eat bug types! So why would either of us? And catching a pachirisu was another matter entirely and by the looks of their speed and flexibility, I would surely lose them in a chase that wouldn’t last long.

Neither of us really said anything for the next few hours. The same thing repeated itself as we trekked closer to the mountains, and we both (Zhol rather reluctantly) ate a few berries we happened to pass. Water was freely available, being only metres away from us the whole time, which, although unnerving, was quite convenient.

A day had passed before we managed to snag some fish from a small pond we crossed paths with, and I was finally satisfied as I had a decent-sized one to myself. We had also covered significant ground since the day before at the waterfall, and I was confident Zhol knew where she was going. ...And hopefully she was too.

Continued in next post...
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  #306  
Old 01-15-2010, 03:28 AM
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Default Re: Through the Eyes of a Flareon ~ [PG: 13+]

Evening fell yet again as it always did near the same time each day, the Sun hinting that soon it would submerge beyond the horizon as it shone its last rays. Zhol and I were still trekking up a hill that seemed to go on for a while—a sign that the mountains were drawing nearer. The trees were thinning out and becoming less abundant and the temperature – although at a leisurely rate – was increasingly dropping. She told me that once we were at the top of the hill we would stop and rest, and depending on how tired we were by the end we would either sleep or keep moving.

It seemed like another fifteen or so minutes before we would reach the hill’s peak, and that seemed to pass painfully slowly. My legs ached by the end, but at least there was relief to aid me as I slumped against the ground and let my eyelids slide down and meet. “Zhol,” I panted, listening as she must have leaned against a tree. “We are not going on.” I waited about five seconds for a reply, but I decided I wouldn’t get one. “Come on—let’s go to sleep.”

I could only imagine her frown. “It’s too early for that,” she muttered. “And, Dusty—there’s no shelter here.”

I growled with annoyance, dragging on a frustrated noise while opening my eyes to look at her. “Whyyyyyy?” But I knew why. In fact, she had already said why. “Well...can we at least rest for a while?”

“...Yes,” she agreed, sitting against the tree. “With the progress we’re making, we should be there by tomorrow afternoon.”

I blinked with surprise, a frown of my own weaving across my face. “Umm...what?” I questioned with disbelief. Was she crazy? I moved my head to the tall mountains situated still a fair while away. I became disappointed as I realised how close I thought they were compared to the reality. They hadn’t been within my view for the whole day because of trees and that enormous slope, so I had pictured them not to be far. “How do we get to the mountains – let alone climb to the other side of them – in less than one day?” I asked cynically.

Zhol looked surprised. She glanced to the same formations I had been referring to and then back to me. “You...plan on passing the mountains?”

I nodded slowly. “Yeah...” I waited for her to give me an answer to my question, but when I gave her the time to, she didn’t. I then thought of something. “Wait... Your colony... is on the other side of those mountains, right?”

“No... Was that what you assumed?”

I let my thoughts figure it out, pulling myself up so I was sitting. “Hah,” I chuckled, clearing my face of negative expression. “I never actually asked where it was! For some odd reason the impression I had was that it was...” I sank into a laying position, facing the direction we would head off in. “...So, does that mean the clan lives close to them?”

“Relatively. It’s a few days from the foot of the closest mountain,” the sneasel told me. She rose to her feet and shifted her eyes to mine. “...When is it you want to continue?” she wondered.

I met her soft stare. “Oh, soon...” I answered. “...Come on,” I offered shortly after, brushing the grass beside me with my fluffy tail, smiling with a friendly tone, “take a seat.” I nodded as if gesturing to the spot and telling her to sit. “We’ll wait for the Sun to go down and then we’ll head off. ‘Kay?” I increased my smile and closed my eyes gleefully, and after she hesitated but complied, I began to sway the puff ball on my rear end. She gave somewhat of a smile of her own and bent her knees so her feet were touching and laid her arms so her paws were in the gap between them. “Great view, huh?”

“Mm,” the dark and ice type nodded, and soon after, she stretched out her legs and leant on her arms before extending them behind her. “It’s...pretty.”

***

“...So, is it possible? Can you help us?”

I stared at the pokémon before me with the same confused and sceptical face as before, trying to understand why these creatures were so boneheaded! And I was still upset with them for their apprehension method. My head hurt. “Wh— Look, I’m sorry, but we have problems of our own right now, and to sto—”

“Please! We’re begging you! We need your help!” pleaded one—the leader, it seemed.

“But you don’t even know if I’m your ally or your foe at this stage! You can’t just gra—” I explained in a what-the-hell-is-wrong-with-you manner, but I was interrupted yet again.

“But please! We can see you’re a good pokémon!” the head of his colony tried to convince, his speech impediment getting on my nerves.

“But that doesn’t even—!”

“We’ll give you a reward...” an accomplice – the pre-evolution of the pokémon in charge – cut in hopefully.

I sighed, glancing behind me. My two abductors stood on guard—well, sat on guard at the entrance. They were, too, looking worriedly towards me, their heads lowered to make them look almost as if they had done something wrong, but I knew they were concerned about my answer. “...How long will it take?” I asked after sighing and looking at my toes. I kept my eyes on him with a non-impressed expression, agitated and impatient. My tail flicked with irritation.

“N...not long,” said the supposed superior, looking to his side to the smaller pokémon, and I assumed he began to wonder if I was, in fact, going to agree. By the look on his face, I assumed he was more convinced I would help out.

“No, I want a figure. Minutes? Hours? If you ca—”

“A figure? Oh, no, no. It could be a while before they come back, or it could be in seconds! And the dams usually take most of the night to build,” interjected who must have been second in charge.

I gave her a forced, very light smile as I twitched with annoyance, my hostile eyes getting in the way of my appearance of a calm flareon. But I stopped, going over her words in my mind. “Dam?” I glanced between the two pokémon, a tad eager for more answers. “What dam...?”

Fifteen minutes earlier:

Like I had promised, we rested for around ten minutes before getting up, stretching and clearing the other side of the hill. It had been a while since I had gone downhill, and I was forced to lope down it awkwardly, unable to own control over my ability to stop. Zhol looked as if she had similar problems, but she wasn’t the one who ended up tripping and landing face-first into a tree trunk...

I redeemed myself by picking up my body as if nothing had happened and shaking off. I had become distracted and pounced on a cricket hoping to hop from harm’s way, making sure I didn’t crush it. Zhol watched, looking as if her plan was to press on, but I leapt after the small insect, swiping with my paws and keeping my back end raised.
We stopped moving, and Zhol explained that she was going to go ahead while I remained behind. When I asked why, she said it was to survey the coming area after claiming to have heard chatter. She aimed to keep my mind one-tracked by telling me to keep on my guard before she raced away, swerving behind a mass of bushes.

Every time I spotted a cicada or a beetle to distract myself with, I automatically switched back on task and recited the sneasel’s words to remind myself of my purpose. There were only few as opposed to the many I found earlier, but the answer stumped my toe as I screwed up my face. “Ow,” I whispered quickly, vengeful of the root that had disturbed me and eying it with my slit-like glare. I hadn’t noticed it because of the sly darkness, and it only then occurred to me how dark it had grown. ‘Oh. Well that explains the vanishing bugs.’

“Pick a fight with that root,” someone – or something – began, “and it’ll become obvious who’ll win.”

I jumped and froze on the spot, the hairs on my body standing on end as if guarding something themselves. I found it rather ironic that Zhol had kept me here to protect me in case whatever was up ahead was harmful when back where I remained was where someone else lurked. And I had no idea what their intentions were! After all that had happened, it could have been anything. I chanced a breath, keeping immobile so I could rake the suspect out of the bushes that had been appearing much more frequently. My front and right side were bushed off, giving plenty of room for a predator of any sort to slip into and conceal themselves. I swallowed, unable to spot even the slightest sign of movement.

“Seriously,” they said again, and I recognised the voice to be male, “you really don’t stand a chance against it.”

I whirled around, the voice reaching my ear from diagonally to my right and back, where the bushes continued to stretch. There was no face...not even a claw I could see. And if I took it upon myself to release fire, it could cause a problem for the forest – as would using toxic – and attacking by using my body wasn’t smart because—

“Wait... What?” I questioned, all fear ridding itself of my body before I acquired an insulted feeling. “Hey! I might look like a regular flareon, but I spurt a mean flamethrower,” I huffed, throwing my head back and to the side whilst fluffing my mane even more. “...That root wouldn’t last five seconds.”

“Neither would I if you burned down me and my home,” he chuckled, having moved a few paces ahead but still to the right. I frowned, drawing my head back.

‘How could he...move? When I was listening for movement the whole time...?’ “I wouldn’t attack a root,” I confirmed, not so sure about the accuracy of the comment when I spoke it.

“You positive? You’re pretty feisty!”

“Ye-ah. Comes with my attitude. Now how about showing yourself?”

“I’d argue that it comes with your hot temper, you fiery flareon, you,” he teased.

“Wh-what?” I blurted in disbelief, waiting a moment before shaking my head and stuttering in a frustrated attempt to find words and express my angry confusion. “H-h—how can you even say that?!” I exclaimed, my emotions rising.

“Well, quite easily. And I’d say, since you have a flair for flaring up so quickly...your ideal nickname would be Flair.”

“But you don’t even know me!” I boiled, offended he thought he could be so quick to judge me—even if I was hot-headed! “And I don’t even know you, so how about you just step out—” I squeezed through the shrubs difficultly, barely noticing as thin branches prodded my skin, and came into view of a river. It flowed down a hill to my left, in the same direction Zhol had followed, but disappeared as bushes covered the view further down.

I glanced around, puzzled about the fact that my stalker was not present, and scowled. But at the same time I noticed that the forest had changed. What I was staring out into was a large plain with only few trees. Bordering the plain was the normal forest, but I found it rather odd that there should be such a vast glade when we had seen none till this moment.

The trees and smaller plantation held their posts like troops along my right and turned to stand as a wall far in front of me and continued down the left for a while whilst bordering the exposed area. I knew I was standing in a corner, but something told me that after the part of the forest I had just been before appearing here was more of this open grassland, and since Zhol headed straight forward, she was probably there. I could hear faint noises in the distance and I wondered if perhaps there was any pokémon living further down, but at the moment, I could only see that the river turned into the area further down in a large expanse...

All too fast I was dragged back into the bushes and slammed on my side, and I immediately fired a stream of fire, but it was cut horribly short as I blacked out before I could even feel the adrenaline rush.

***

A silhouette observed as the flareon was knocked out and restrained, nodding as he imagined he had done a satisfiable job. A section of his lips parted so many fangs glinted as he grunted in a humoured fashion. “Wonder how this’ll end...” With another chuckle, the creature rose and flicked a slim tail. “May fate draw us together again in the near future.” He grinned, looking back another time. “...Now that would be interesting...Flair.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

OH, AND I HAVE AN IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT TO MAKE! From the next chapter onwards, I won't be capitalising the first letter of 'pokemon' and and other pokemon species name.

Thanks for reading another chapter of Through the Eyes of a Flareon! You know I love you guys. ^^

~GS.
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Last edited by Graceful_Suicune; 08-29-2012 at 07:14 AM. Reason: DON'T QUESTION ME!! C:<
  #307  
Old 01-15-2010, 07:20 AM
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Default Re: Through the Eyes of a Flareon ~ [PG: 13+]

Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay new chapter!

As usual (I think?) I'll start with the typos:
Quote:
However, the darkness was lowering my sight’s accuracy for one, and there were many slopes throughout the forest which meant that it could be in a slop I couldn’t see...
XDDD "Slop."
Quote:
Two feathers with traces of blood on each were on the ground near their feet. Pawprints dotted the sandy dirt, and there were bigger circles of where Pokémon once sat, as well as a faint scent.
This kind of confused me when I read it...maybe instead of 'of,' put 'indicating?'
Quote:
Had it not been for her...and none of the many Pokémon would have escaped and many more of them would be dead.”
I'm kinda confused... D: Is it supposed to say "many of the pokemon would not have escaped and many... (blah blah blah)?"
Quote:
“...That root wouldn’t last five seconds.”

“Neither would I if you threatened to burn down my home,” he chuckled
The last sentence is kind of confusing...was he meant to say "neither would you" or "neither would I if you burned down my home?" It doesn't really make sense that he wouldn't last five seconds if she only threatened to burn it. XD


Okay, now funny parts!
Quote:
No prey, no bushes with fruit... All I could do was nibble on leaves...LEAVES. ‘This is getting ridiculous...’ I thought angrily, ‘There’s always a bush with some sort of fruit...or vegetables...or something...’ However, complaining wasn’t going to get me anywhere... “But still!”
The "But still" made me laugh. xD
Quote:
And they were also too spaced out for me to use more than one at the same time, so unless I could divide myself into two there wasn’t much of a hope. ‘Even though it would be cool...’
Even though it would be cool... XD
Quote:
I shrugged, holding an “oh, shucks” look on my face.
The way I imagined the look on her face was priceless. XD
Quote:
I squeaked as something sharp poked the back of my leg, and I leapt forward and spun around! However, I identified the predator as...a stick. “Great. Now the twigs are preying on me...”
Gotta be careful of those twigs...they're sneaky.
Quote:
“That’s lovely and all,” I began, turning my head to the left, “but...can we sleep now, please? I’ll promise to admire it properly in the morning and give you a melodramatic reaction.”
I love how she just tells her that. xD
Quote:
‘Just a Pidgey,’ I thought. ‘Wait... Breakfast!’ I bolted towards them under the direction of my stomach as they took to the air after cooing uncomfortably. “Come back! I just wanna eat you!”
That'll get the prey to come!
Quote:
I almost slipped at one point and managed to dip my tail into it, so that end of it was wet. Yay.
That random 'yay' on the end... xD
Quote:
I began to sway the puff ball on my rear end.
Best description of a flareon's tail ever!
Quote:
Zhol looked as if she had similar problems, but she wasn’t the one who ended up tripping and landing face-first into a tree trunk...
For some reason I imagined that in slow motion. XDDD
Quote:
“I wouldn’t attack a root,” I confirmed, not so sure about the comment myself.
Haha, I was just thinking when I read her comment, "Really?"


I didn't think this chapter dragged on...it was entertaining and not boring or anything. I like how you described the scenery around them, particularly at the parts with the water (and of course Dusty's thoughts on it XD). Plus this chapter really gives the sense that it's a long journey and that they're spending a long time traveling...okay, I really didn't know how to say that without sounding stupid, but that's the best I can describe it. I mean, there's so many little details that are usually just glossed over in stories, it seems, and that really adds to it in a good way, but doesn't make it seem like everything has to be totally over-described...IF THAT MAKES ANY SENSE.

I kind of wonder why Zhol had to leave her home...I'm guessing she was forced to leave by someone or something, judging by her reaction. I also wanna know who those pokemon at the end are, and what they need Dusty for. Considering they said 'dam' I think it might have something to do with bidoof, but I'm not sure what the pokemon in the last paragraph would be. And I could see why she would be annoyed...what they did was really an...odd way to ask someone for help. xD

I'm also really curious about that big pokemon with the human(?) riding on its back and pointing at Dusty, which then just vanished. Weird.

I'm looking forward to the next one and I'm glad you decided to post this one first. Hopefully the next one will be soon, since it's short. Why yes, of course I'm patient! Which reminds me, I better get working on my own chapter and uh...I'm getting off topic! *shuts up*
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Last edited by Scytherwolf; 01-15-2010 at 10:07 PM.
  #308  
Old 01-15-2010, 10:33 AM
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Default Re: Through the Eyes of a Flareon ~ [PG]

Quote:
Originally Posted by Scytherwolf View Post
Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay new chapter!

As I usual (I think?) I'll start with the typos:

XDDD "Slop."

This kind of confused me when I read it...maybe instead of 'of,' put 'indicating?'

I'm kinda confused... D: Is it supposed to say "many of the pokemon would not have escaped and many... (blah blah blah)?"

The last sentence is kind of confusing...was he meant to say "neither would you" or "neither would I if you burned down my home?" It doesn't really make sense that he wouldn't last five seconds if she only threatened to burn it. XD

Okay, now funny parts!

The "But still" made me laugh. xD

Even though it would be cool... XD

The way I imagined the look on her face was priceless. XD

Gotta be careful of those twigs...they're sneaky.

I love how she just tells her that. xD

That'll get the prey to come!

That random 'yay' on the end... xD

Best description of a flareon's tail ever!

For some reason I imagined that in slow motion. XDDD

Haha, I was just thinking when I read her comment, "Really?"


I didn't think this chapter dragged on...it was entertaining and not boring or anything. I like how you described the scenery around them, particularly at the parts with the water (and of course Dusty's thoughts on it XD). Plus this chapter really gives the sense that it's a long journey and that they're spending a long time traveling...okay, I really didn't know how to say that without sounding stupid, but that's the best I can describe it. I mean, there's so many little details that are usually just glossed over in stories, it seems, and that really adds to it in a good way, but doesn't make it seem like everything has to be totally over-described...IF THAT MAKES ANY SENSE.

I kind of wonder why Zhol had to leave her home...I'm guessing she was forced to leave by someone or something, judging by her reaction. I also wanna know who those pokemon at the end are, and what they need Dusty for. Considering they said 'dam' I think it might have something to do with bidoof, but I'm not sure what the pokemon in the last paragraph would be. And I could see why she would be annoyed...what they did was really an...odd way to ask someone for help. xD

I'm also really curious about that big pokemon with the human(?) riding on its back and pointing at Dusty, which then just vanished. Weird.

I'm looking forward to the next one and I'm glad you decided to post this one first. Hopefully the next one will be soon, since it's short. Why yes, of course I'm patient! Which reminds me, I better get working on my own chapter and uh...I'm getting off topic! *shuts up*
O SCY YOU MADE A TYPO

I fixed all the errors. 8D Thanks for pointing them out. xD Annoying things! Live and learn. xD But you wouldn't believe how many there were prior to the check I did. xD AND HAHA! It was hilarious when I realised that I wrote 'slop'!!!! xDDDDD And I just realised that I didn't italicise some thoughts. ^^; (Before the roots comment.) So I'll go and edit that now. :3 BEFORE YOU CAN SEE! >:D

xDDD I'm so glad all those parts made you laugh! I loved your reaction/comments on each one as well! xD xD I agree with the twigs comment! And I'm sure Dusty will too. xD Yeah, I love that look too. xD And haha! Slow motion, 'ey? xD I could imagine that now! XD And yeah--remember all that 'prey-catching talent' she was so sure she had? Well, that's her method! xD xDD

Oh, you didn't? Well, that's a positive relief...well...reliefs always are positive (xD) but you know what I mean. And I think I get what you mean... But were you saying I added too much description or I wrote it so it fit... Or something?

:( Well, the Usster's is her home now, but yeah. :3 You'll find out about that from... Let's just say "not her". xD Well, it's not quite the reason, but good guess. ;D AND NUUU. :x xD I guess it was obvious anyway. But you'll still see! >:x Hehehe, well, I've actually talked to you about him briefly, but not really. xD Hopefully we'll meet him properly soon too! 8D

Heh. Hm. *stifles giggles* Unfortunately you won't find out what that is... At least, not in this story. ;D THEN WHAT'S THE POINT OF PUTTING IT IN THERE? For my own amusement. xD

Hehe. :D I hopefully will finish it soon. :3 I'm glad you liked this one and you're looking forward to the next one! 8D I think I have a proper plan for it. xD And it's okay--I don't mind off track discussion. :D xD Anyway, reading someone else's fic only wants you to write more of your own, after all! x)

Thanks again! <3

~GS.
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Last edited by Graceful_Suicune; 01-15-2010 at 10:37 AM.
  #309  
Old 01-15-2010, 11:33 AM
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Default Re: Through the Eyes of a Flareon ~ [PG]

Quote:
Originally Posted by Graceful_Suicune View Post


O SCY YOU MADE A TYPO

I fixed all the errors. 8D Thanks for pointing them out. xD Annoying things! Live and learn. xD But you wouldn't believe how many there were prior to the check I did. xD AND HAHA! It was hilarious when I realised that I wrote 'slop'!!!! xDDDDD And I just realised that I didn't italicise some thoughts. ^^; (Before the roots comment.) So I'll go and edit that now. :3 BEFORE YOU CAN SEE! >:D

xDDD I'm so glad all those parts made you laugh! I loved your reaction/comments on each one as well! xD xD I agree with the twigs comment! And I'm sure Dusty will too. xD Yeah, I love that look too. xD And haha! Slow motion, 'ey? xD I could imagine that now! XD And yeah--remember all that 'prey-catching talent' she was so sure she had? Well, that's her method! xD xDD

Oh, you didn't? Well, that's a positive relief...well...reliefs always are positive (xD) but you know what I mean. And I think I get what you mean... But were you saying I added too much description or I wrote it so it fit... Or something?

:( Well, the Usster's is her home now, but yeah. :3 You'll find out about that from... Let's just say "not her". xD Well, it's not quite the reason, but good guess. ;D AND NUUU. :x xD I guess it was obvious anyway. But you'll still see! >:x Hehehe, well, I've actually talked to you about him briefly, but not really. xD Hopefully we'll meet him properly soon too! 8D

Heh. Hm. *stifles giggles* Unfortunately you won't find out what that is... At least, not in this story. ;D THEN WHAT'S THE POINT OF PUTTING IT IN THERE? For my own amusement. xD

Hehe. :D I hopefully will finish it soon. :3 I'm glad you liked this one and you're looking forward to the next one! 8D I think I have a proper plan for it. xD And it's okay--I don't mind off track discussion. :D xD Anyway, reading someone else's fic only wants you to write more of your own, after all! x)

Thanks again! <3

~GS.
WHERE? :O

Oh, okay! Yes, 'slop' was a funny word for that sentence. XD

Her method is genius!

Um...now I'm confused. ^^; I don't think I said anything about too much description...at least I didn't mean it like that (I think?)...uh...which comment of mine were you talking about? *confuzzled*

OH! OH! I THINK I KNOW WHO THAT POKEMON IS NOW. C=<

Really? :o Was it related to some other story or something?

Okay, awesome!
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  #310  
Old 01-15-2010, 11:43 AM
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Default Re: Through the Eyes of a Flareon ~ [PG]

Quote:
Originally Posted by Scytherwolf View Post
WHERE? :O

Oh, okay! Yes, 'slop' was a funny word for that sentence. XD

Her method is genius!

Um...now I'm confused. ^^; I don't think I said anything about too much description...at least I didn't mean it like that (I think?)...uh...which comment of mine were you talking about? *confuzzled*

OH! OH! I THINK I KNOW WHO THAT POKEMON IS NOW. C=<

Really? :o Was it related to some other story or something?

Okay, awesome!
You said "As I usual (bla bla bla...)" xD The 'I' is outta place! :D

xDDD Haha, that is so true. xD It's funny I didn't pick up on it when I read through it too. xD But then again, I didn't pick up on the other things! xD

xDD Except it has the 'it doesn't work' flaw. Dx

Dx Haha, I guess I didn't make sense! Well so was that comment about what people do in general, or was it referring to something I wrote? xD

O NO I RUINED IT FOR YOU! Dx WELL YOU'RE THE ONLY ONE WHO KNOWS ANYWAY. xD You're special! =D

*shifts eyes* ...She's onto me! *flees*

:D

~GS
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Pe2k's spiritual successor! :D I'm Suicune's Fire there.
  #311  
Old 01-15-2010, 10:09 PM
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Default Re: Through the Eyes of a Flareon ~ [PG]

Quote:
Originally Posted by Graceful_Suicune View Post


You said "As I usual (bla bla bla...)" xD The 'I' is outta place! :D

xDDD Haha, that is so true. xD It's funny I didn't pick up on it when I read through it too. xD But then again, I didn't pick up on the other things! xD

xDD Except it has the 'it doesn't work' flaw. Dx

Dx Haha, I guess I didn't make sense! Well so was that comment about what people do in general, or was it referring to something I wrote? xD

O NO I RUINED IT FOR YOU! Dx WELL YOU'RE THE ONLY ONE WHO KNOWS ANYWAY. xD You're special! =D

*shifts eyes* ...She's onto me! *flees*

:D

~GS
Oooohh..well I fixed it!

Yeah. xD

Well, yes, there is that...

I think it was about what people do in general...I'm still kind of confused...I'm bad at explaining myself. D:

YAY I'M A SPECIAL POTATO CHIP!

I knew it!
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  #312  
Old 01-16-2010, 12:06 AM
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Default Re: Through the Eyes of a Flareon ~ [PG]

Quote:
Originally Posted by Scytherwolf View Post
Oooohh..well I fixed it!

Yeah. xD

Well, yes, there is that...

I think it was about what people do in general...I'm still kind of confused...I'm bad at explaining myself. D:

YAY I'M A SPECIAL POTATO CHIP!

I knew it!
xDDD Good one. :3

xD

Oh, haha, don't worry about it then. ^^ It's more complicated through typing anyway. xD

YAY!! ORIGINALITY!!

Dx Well, I guess it was no big surprise once I gave it away. xD

~GS.
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Pe2k's spiritual successor! :D I'm Suicune's Fire there.
  #313  
Old 01-16-2010, 05:31 AM
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Default Re: Through the Eyes of a Flareon ~ [PG]

TL;DR.

:V

Srsly, I read it. All three posts of it. You were in... rare form. o-o

Keep it up.
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  #314  
Old 01-16-2010, 09:53 AM
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Default Re: Through the Eyes of a Flareon ~ [PG]

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pokol DaErran View Post
TL;DR.

:V

Srsly, I read it. All three posts of it. You were in... rare form. o-o

Keep it up.
Okay, I'll pretend I know what that means. Dx ..."Totally Lame; Dreadful Rubbish"? xDD

Uhh...thanks? xD ARE YOU SPEAKING ENGLISH TODAY, POKOL?!?! >:L I don't know what rare form is. Dx Is that bad?

Thanks for reading anyway!

~GS.
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Pokemon Crossroads!
Pe2k's spiritual successor! :D I'm Suicune's Fire there.
  #315  
Old 01-16-2010, 11:50 AM
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Default Re: Through the Eyes of a Flareon ~ [PG]

Quote:
Originally Posted by Graceful_Suicune View Post


Okay, I'll pretend I know what that means. Dx ..."Totally Lame; Dreadful Rubbish"? xDD

Uhh...thanks? xD ARE YOU SPEAKING ENGLISH TODAY, POKOL?!?! >:L I don't know what rare form is. Dx Is that bad?

Thanks for reading anyway!

~GS.
Apparently, you're good. xD That means you were doing excellent; really great. Rare. C:

I should read more, but I'm a little stuck without the net.

Might I ask for an email of a word document? If that's alright with you, of course.
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