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Creative Writing Share your fan fiction, stories, poems, essays, editorials, song lyrics, or any other related written work. All written must be your creation. Start a new thread, and keep replying to that thread as you add on more chapters. Anyone can join in at anytime.


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  #16  
Old 04-01-2007, 03:59 PM
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Default Re: Hoenn Insane: The Version of R/S/E You Didn't See

I love this story! Heheh...See, look, you got the heartless kid to laugh.

Heh...This Anti-Sue sounds..interesting....I hope you get done with the next entry soon!
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  #17  
Old 04-02-2007, 01:42 PM
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Default Re: Hoenn Insane: The Version of R/S/E You Didn't See

You have to feel sorry for Kenta... he's been annoyed by an arrogant white-haired boy, an eight-year-old girl who butchers the English language every time she speaks, a bottom-biting Trapinch, two of the most annoying villains I have ever heard of, and... Satan.

Good job on the story! ^_^
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  #18  
Old 04-04-2007, 06:41 PM
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Default Re: Hoenn Insane: The Version of R/S/E You Didn't See

Thanks for the comments, Ritz, Ultima! I really appreciate it. Alrighty, this next chapter is a demonstration of what some people tend to do in Poke'Mon RPGs, besides Mary-Sue. The question is, can any of you relate? I, for one, KNOW people like the upcoming Random Kid.

************************************************** ************************

*** Chapter 11: Random Kids With The Voice ***

Dear Diary,

Hey, it's me again (what, you were expecting Big Bird?) and today I'm off to face my past. No, I'm not going to be digging up my time capsule that's full of ten-year old drawings of Pikachu being stabbed through the skull by a lance (boy, was I ever a violent kid.) Instead, I'm going to face the first Gym Leader I ever fought, in a rematch. Ehehehehe . . . I kinda lost to him the first time we fought.

*Flashback*

Kenta: *Singing* I know a song that get's on everybody's nerves, everybody's nerves, everybody's nerves, I know a song that gets on everybody's nerves and this is how it goes! I know a song that gets on everybody's nerves, everybody's nerves, every-

Mary-Sue: stop it ketna ur bein anoyig

Kenta: Sorry, but I'm feeling a bit apprehensive. After all, we didn't take the shortcut through Wally's hometown and through that ten-foot-long cave just to buy Krispy-Kreme doughnuts at Rustboro's local gas station . . .

Mary-Sue: we wernt??????????/?

Kenta: NO! Why would they even have a Co-Go's? Cars don't exist in this world!

Mary-Sue: o darn

Kenta: *Sigh* We have to go all the way back to Petalburg City because I lost to Norman there. Frankly, I don't even know why such a tough gym leader is the FIRST ONE along the road. Maybe they just do it to piss you off.

Mary-Sue: mabye

Kenta: Alright . . . now, I don't know if this is allowed, but I'm going to have a flashback within a flashback. Mary-Sue, if the world suddenly explodes because of this, I blame you.

Mary-Sue: w/e

Kenta: Okay, here I go . . .

*Flashback within a flashback*



*End flashback within a flashback*

Mary-Sue: did it wokr

Kenta: Didn't you just see that dimensional vortex that nearly swallowed us both up?! No, it did not work! We're lucky the universe didn't collapse in upon itself. *Sigh* Looks like I'll just have to do it this way. Alright, it was back when I was only sixteen years old . . .

Mary-Sue: ur 16 now

Kenta: So? Anyway, back when I was sixteen and about a week younger than I am right now, I fought Norman in a gym battle, two-on-two style. He threw out his Vigoroth and a Slaking, and I sent Torchic and Ralts on him.

Mary-Sue: wat hapned

Kenta: Well . . . let's see if this'll work.

*Scene shifts back seven days ago, with Vigoroth having Ralts in a headlock, and Slaking loafing around on top of a struggling Torchic. The swirlies are obvious in both Poke'Mons' eyes*

Kenta: Ahhhhh . . . not a scene I care to recall. But there you go; we got beaten to a pulp.

Mary-Sue: wow u thik ur up 2 it

Kenta: I don't know. *Envisions Norman's Vigoroth having Gardevoir in a headlock, and Slaking loafing around on top of a struggling Combusken* Oog, I don't feel so good.

*End Flashback*

So we headed south from Rustboro through Petalburg Forest, where upon catching sight of us, every Poke'Mon in the vicinity fell over themselves trying to get away in a mad dash. As you might imagine, not a whole lot went on with that. However, when I saw that pile of dog doo again, I immediately had Combusken incinerate it on the spot. THAT's showing 'em what for! We passed the exit sign out of the forest, and just before heading east to Petalburg City, we made a brief stop at Mr. Britany's house.

*Flashback*

Mary-Sue: wats al tht nois??????????????

Kenta: It's coming from Mr. Britany's ramshackled little hut! Let's check it out.

*Sounds of pots and pans banging around can be heard inside. Kenta and Mary-Sue crack open the door and peek in*

Mary-Sue: omg

Kenta: What the hell??

Mr. Britany: *Chasing Wingull* Come back here, Peeko! I've prepared . . . a nice . . . hot . . . bath . . . for . . . you!

Peeko: *Squawking desperately, zooming around the kitchen* Wingull! Wingull!

Kenta: *Shutting the door* C'mon. It's better we don't get involved.

Mary-Sue: but wat if he cachs peko

Kenta: He won't. Britany will probably trip over something eventually and break his leg.

*BOOM! "Ow! @#$%!!" *

Kenta: Feeling better yet?

Mary-Sue: not realy

*Five minutes later*

Kenta: Well, here we are! Petalburg City! Badge 5, here I come!

Random Kid: hey u i chalng u 2 a batl

Kenta: Huh? Oh, someone wants your attention, Mary-Sue.

Random Kid: no i chaleng u!!!! i no abot marysu alredy

Mary-Sue: u shod fite him ketna b4 ur jim batl

Kenta: (How'd he know who Mary-Sue was? No, don't ask questions.) Alright, I don't know who you are, or why you just randomly decided to challenge me . . . well, wait, if you're a random kid, it's only natural you'd do stuff randomly.

Random Kid: hury up go zigzoon *Tosses out a Zigzagoon*

Kenta: . . . are you serious? That thing's maybe level 3. This isn't even worth it.

Random Kid: hury up

Kenta: Alright, fine! I'll humor you. Daisuke, go get that Zigzagoon with Fury Swipes, and try not to kill it by accident.

Random Kid: doge it n us body slm

*Zigzagoon darts out of the way as the Ninjask shoots at it at 150-some mph. Then in the blink of an eye, it slams Daisuke to the ground*

Random Kid: yawn borning

Kenta: . . . . no @#$%ing way. That's not fair!

Random Kid: sedn out ur nex pokmon

Kenta: You've got The Voice! That's how you're doing it . . . you're cheating!

Random Kid: hury up

Mary-Sue: cmon ketna u can do it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

Kenta: (Little bastard . . . I'm gonna rip his face off . . .) Combusken, it's all you! Double Kick! Mae geiri chudan, miwosho geiri jodan!

Mary-Sue: wtf

Kenta: (It's Japanese.)

Random Kid: doge n us mega pucnh

*Zigzagoon jumps over Combusken's first kick, but then the second kick comes down and plows its face into the ground*

Kenta: YES! If we can get around this stupid "dodge" thing, we'll get him just like we got the Aquas!

Random Kid: rrrrrr zigoon us hiper beem!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

*Zigzagoon straightens up, looking completely replenished, then fires a Hyper Beam attack at Combusken that sends him flying all the way back into Rustboro Forest*

Random Kid: lol tht was ez

Kenta: . . . . . no . . . . not after all that training we did . . . not after all the crap I've gone through . . . I will NOT lose to you!

Random Kid: lol u r god traner but im beter *Zigzagoon growls at Kenta*

Kenta: *Getting an idea* Heh . . . you'd like to think that, wouldn't you? But there's one thing you overlooked.

Random Kid: o ya

Kenta: Dark! Finish the job! *Sends out Shedinja*

Random Kid: lol shednja oly has 1 hp ur gon donw

Kenta: Oh, I beg to differ. A Poke'Mon can only have a maximum of four moves, and you just gave Body Slam, Mega Punch, Hyper Beam, and Growl. You let that last one slip when you allowed Zigzagoon to growl at me.

Random Kid: so wat zigzoon hiper beem

Kenta: That's not going to work. *Hyper Beam shoots straight through Shedinja and blasts Kenta instead*

*End Flashback*

I woke up later in the Petalburg hospital to find out that I'd won the match. The kid, as utterly unbeatable as his Zigzagoon was, couldn't think up any moves other than Normal-type ones to use. I mean, don't get me wrong, he tried hitting Shedinja with everything from Tackle to Double-Edge, but due to both Shedinja being a Ghost-type and the effects of Wonder Guard, nothing he did worked. Mary-Sue told me she'd taken over for me while two medics ran me to the hospital on a stretcher (where'd they come from, I wonder?), but technically, since it was my Poke'Mon, it was my win. The Random Kid was in total denial of losing, and kept screaming that even though Zigzagoon was his only Poke'Mon, he was the real winner since he took down two of mine whereas I only took down his one. People these days . . .

*Flashback*

Mary-Sue: how r u feelin ketna

Kenta: *In the hospital bed, covered in wraps* Well . . . I can't feel my legs, I can't feel my arms, and I can't feel my face. I guess that's a good thing, because it'd probably hurt like hell if I could.

Brendan: *Banging in through the door to Kenta's room* Hey, Kenta! I had a bunch of people hired to take you down as soon as you set foot in Norman's gym, but as it turns out, they thought I was you instead . . . (I knew I should've met with them in person beforehand . . .) Whatever, point is, you would have ended up looking like that anyway.

Kenta: Aww, thanks asswipe. Would you be so kind as to stand there for a couple seconds longer so that I can reach this flowerpot and chuck it at your head?

Brendan: Tidings of love and joy to you, too. Oh, by the way, I beat Norman and now have my fifth badge, so I've pulled ahead of ya, dude. But don't worry, I didn't just come here to laugh at your injuries and thumb my nose at you . . .

Kenta: (Ah, he's so thoughtful. I can almost reach that flowerpot, just a couple more inches . . .)

Brendan: I also came to let you have this HM03, Surf. Wally's uncle gave it to me just for the hell of it, but now that I've made use of it, I don't feel like hauling it around. If you want it, I'll give it to you if you turn around three times and say "Pikachu."

Kenta: You totally stole that from the T.V. show!

Brendan: So? I've always wanted to say that. I guess you don't want-

Mary-Sue: *Completing the third turn* pikchu

*End Flashback*

As you might imagine, it took me a couple of days to write this entry in, but hey, it was well worth it. Technically, I beat a person with The Voice, and more importantly, I lived through a Hyper Beam attack. When was the last time you did that? Anyway! I'm going to face Norman tomorrow, and hopefully this time around he'll be the one getting served.

Until the next entry,
-Kenta
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  #19  
Old 04-04-2007, 11:51 PM
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Default Re: Hoenn Insane: The Version of R/S/E You Didn't See

didnt you right this story on pkmn crater as well
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  #20  
Old 04-06-2007, 07:25 AM
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Default Re: Hoenn Insane: The Version of R/S/E You Didn't See

Kenta... this is WAY too funny XD every time I read one of thse I laugh my guts off and also

Kenta: . . . “Peeko”?

Britany: Yeah, I decided on her name after she peed on my Treecko.

Mary-Sue: dat maks sens

Kenta: For once, it actually does. In a very disturbing way.

if anyone didn't laugh at that, they know nothing of funny (yes, I know how to quote, didn't feel like it )
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  #21  
Old 04-08-2007, 11:56 PM
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Default Re: Hoenn Insane: The Version of R/S/E You Didn't See

Now I've seen everything when you step in the dog doo and the TOrchic is snickering at you! Nice little 'shot' at a certain politician.
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  #22  
Old 04-09-2007, 04:33 PM
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Default Re: Hoenn Insane: The Version of R/S/E You Didn't See

Heh, I'm not done with that certain politician yet . . . not nearly.

Quote:
didnt you right this story on pkmn crater as well
Yes, but I thought I'd repost it here for the people who don't go there to enjoy. And perhaps spread the concept of The Voice around a bit more. Uh . . . for the record, are you just pretending to speak in The Voice right now, or do you really ignore grammar all the time-?

This is one of my favorite chapters here, and it says a lot about the Poke'Mon television show.

************************************************** ************************

*** Chapter 12: Hey Ur Ash ***

Dear Diary,

Hey, it's me again (what, you were expecting Harry Armpet?), and today something really weird happened. Um, weird-ER. Than usual. It was the day of my gym battle with Norman, and I was all pumped to kick his butt, and then an unfortunate event went and screwed everything up. We'd just arrived at the gym . . .

*Flashback*

Kenta: All right, Norman, prepare to- *Bangs into someone* owwww!

Ash: hey watr u doig wach wer ur goin

Kenta: Ohhhh . . . WHA-?!

Mary-Sue: hey ur ash

Ash: ya i am hi marysu

Kenta: *Looking back and forth from Mary-Sue to Ash* What? What? What?

Film Crew Guy: Hey, kid! You're in the way! Now we've gotta re-do this scene!

Brock, Max, May: Awwwww!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Kenta: Uh . . . wait, so you're a real person, Ash?

Ash: duh

Kenta: . . . you're not Ash. You don't sound anything like him.

Film Crew Guy: That's because right now, his voice-actor is out, busy putting on her make-up . . . for the seventh time this hour. I swear, one of these days we're going to fire her, and then replace her with an even WORSE voice actor like the smart people we are!

Kenta: Wait, you mean to tell me Ash lip-syncs to some lady reading a script when the camera's rolling, rather than just using his own voice? . . . WHY?

Film Crew Guy: Well, uh . . . when we found out he had The Voice, we thought it might annoy the audience, so we just had him move his mouth while someone else spoke his lines, whenever we were producing the show.

Kenta: Oh my god . . . YOU'RE the moro- er- people who run Poke'Mon Company?!

Film Crew Guy: Yeah, and everything was going peachy-keen until you had to show up and slam into our star. Now we have to re-do the whole scene over again! *To the rest of the film crew* Okay everyone, take twenty! *Immediately twenty boxes of doughnuts are pulled out*

Brock: *As the film crew starts chomping away* Your name's Kenta?

Kenta: How'd you know?

Brock: *Points up* Script.

Kenta: I really need to get used to that. Anyway, yeah . . . you sound okay.

Brock: Eh, heh-heh-heh-heh . . . yeah, that phenomenon didn't affect me. But when Ash showed up in my gym and beat me in our second match using his weird god-powers, I just had to join him! It's not everyday you get a chance to be a T.V. star! They accepted me too . . . they must have liked my talent. Of being able to see where I'm going even with my eyes closed all the time.

Kenta: And you were okay with walking around with a film crew constantly buzzing around you, and Ash being a total nitwit all the time? And . . . *shudder* . . . Misty always running her mouth?

Brock: I didn't mind their arguing . . . back then, The Voice was totally new, and I just wanted to check it out. If a person could be affected by something that powerful, imagine if a Poke'Mon had the same thing . . . as a Poke'Mon breeder, naturally that interested me. I wanted to learn more. You, Kenta, you don't seem to mind following someone with The Voice around.

Kenta: Hey, Mary-Sue follows ME.

*End flashback*

I couldn't believe it. Ash Ketchum, whom I'd always thought was just an animation character, was an actual REAL person! And he had The Voice! I guess I should've seen that one coming though, especially after all those times he beat gym leaders using completely illogical tactics. The time his Pikachu beat Blaine's Rhydon with a Thunderbolt to the horn comes to mind. Now that I think about it, it makes total sense.

Anyway, there we were, in Norman's gym, with Ash, his friends, and all those film crew people from Poke'Mon Company. I thought I smelled burning tires in the air, and the scent appeared to be coming from a guy with a strange smoking pipe of some sort in his mouth. He had the tag "producer" on his shirt, and he looked kind of dazed. I mean, he wasn't surprised or anything, just . . . spaced out. In his own little world.

*Flashback*

Kenta: Hey, what's that guy smoking?

Max: I'm not sure what's in there, but it certainly takes its effect on him. But hey, we just do what they tell us. They're the bosses.

Kenta: So they tried to cover up Ash's having The Voice by having a bad voice actor speak for him?

May: ya thats wat we sed my voic acter is bizy rite now

Brock: I suppose they were trying to motivate their viewers by suggesting anything was possible for any normal person, if you tried hard enough.

Kenta: It doesn't count if you have a handicap.

Max: Hey, these guys PAY us. If they didn't finance our journeying, do you think we could really afford all that food, when none of us have a day job? Look, as long as we keep our dirty little secret covered up, we can keep on winning and entertaining the audience . . . and not starving.

Kenta: Don't you think it becomes a little obvious to the viewers that something's wrong, when Jasmine's Steelix loses to Ash's pipsqueak little Cyndaquil?

Brock: Yes, and that's why Ash loses every now and then . . . the producers bribe people like Gym Leader Brawly and Drake of the Elite Four to stage a victory against him. Who wouldn't accept a bribe like that? To win on television . . . and be PAID for it! Nobody would think he's really an invincible godmod. Uh, I mean, trainer.

Kenta: That's dishonest and deceitfull!

Film Crew Guy: "Dishonest and deceitful" . . . double d's. I like it! Corny, yet catchy! Let's use that for the next Team Rocket incident, which oughta be . . . hey Larry, which one are we on now?

Larry: Let's see, uh . . . Rocket Encounter #3,298,572.

Producer: Ho-ho-ho-ho! I just love those Rocket encounters! I can never get enough of it! Just like this weed! Put in more, MORE I say!

Film Crew Guy: More Rocket encounters, or more weed, sir?

Producer: Both! *Huuuuufffffffff!*

Kenta: So . . . if I were to tell the world about Ash's true self . . .

Brock: Who would listen to you? We've got most of the Poke'Mon fans convinced that all of Ash's battles are totally fair and square. Even the "School of Hard Knocks" Cubone battle, and we went WAY overboard on that one.

Kenta: *Getting an idea* Heh . . . hey, film crew guy, I've just thought up a new episode for you.

Film Crew Guy: So? That's no great charity. We only spend about 40 seconds of planning and thinking out our episodes anyway.

Kenta: (He's probably right . . .) But what would you guys say to having an actual GOOD episode for once?

Entire Film Crew: *Muttering amongst themselves* "A good episode, eh . . . it's been ages since we last had a good episode . . . it would sure be nice for our audience if they got an actual decent show once in a while . . . maybe we should give it a shot . . .

Kenta: Alright then! Hey, Mary-Sue!

Mary-Sue: *Who's been chatting with Ash the entire time* wat

Kenta: You've got Poke'Mon that defy the logic of this world. But Ash here has the ability to manipulate reality to turn the match in his favor. Whadda ya say? How about we stage a match between the two greatest trainers with The Voice ever to exist, right here and now?

May: but i dont batl i win pokmn constest

Kenta: I'M TALKING ABOUT MARY-SUE!

May: o

Mary-Sue: u watn 2 batl ash

Ash: ya!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1 r u redy pikchu

Pikachu: Pi-ka!

Kenta: (Oh my god . . . there it is . . . the infamous beast that destroyed our Poke'fan reputation, standing right in front of me! For so long, I've dreamed of killing it, and I've never been so close as I am now! This could be my only chance! I've got a sword, I could probably stab the little rat and get away before anyone can react quick enough. I must do it. I must! I-)

Max: Huh? Look, Brock, Kenta's twitching for some reason. And he's got a strange look in his eye . . . a lot like the one our producer has, only more sober!

Brock: I can't deny I'm worried . . .

Kenta: (Oh no! They're on to me. But . . . maybe, with luck, Mary-Sue will be able to destroy that foul monster during the match! Yes, I'll wait. When Pikachu's gotten weak, that's when I'll do it . . . *insane giggle* he-he-he-he-he-he-! . . . that's when I'll move in for the kill . . .)

Camera Guy: Okay, film crew, get ready! We're rolling in five, four, three . . .

Brock: Woah! I'd better grab my flags to referee this match!

Ash's Voice Actor: Hey! Don't start without me! Whew . . . I made it!

Camera Guy: Okay, rolling!

Ash's Voice Actor: So, Mary-Sue, at last we can battle! I hope you realize, I'm not going to hold back!

Mary-Sue: ya me nether go espon

Ash's Voice Actor: (As Ash throws his Poke'Ball) Get 'em Corphish!

Brock: The first match! Corphish versus Espeon!

Kenta: (Thanks for stating the obvious-)

Film Crew Guy: (Shhhhhh-uddup!)

Brock: Begin!

*Five minutes later*

Ash's Voice Actor: Uhhhh-ugghhhh . . . grrrrr . . .

Kenta: (Sounds like she's constipated, hehehe-)

Film Crew Guy: (Dammit, will you please be quiet?!)

Brock: Ash is down to one Poke'Mon left! Meanwhile, Mary-Sue still has all of hers in top shape, with Espeon still out on the field!

Camera Guy: (This isn't turning out to be much of an episode, boss . . .)

Producer: (That's all right, let's just do what we always do and have Team Rocket come in now and take up like 70% of the episode's time!)

Camera Guy: (Roger that. Hey, Charlie, tell Jessie and James to get ready!)

Ash's Voice Actor: It's all up to you Pikachu! I believe in you, buddy! No matter how bad the odds get, we'll never give up until we win! Someday, I'm gonna be a Poke'Mon master, and uh . . . and do Poke'Mon master stuff! So go and make me proud!

Pikachu: Pika-chu!

Kenta: Go Mary-Sue! Take no prisoners! You promised Ash you wouldn't hold back, so seriously, DON'T hold back.

May: hey u shodnt cher 4 her we gota root 4 teh uderdog go ash!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111

Kenta: Pfft. This should take about five seconds.

*Five minutes later*

Kenta: Hey, I said seconds! What's going on here?!

Brock: With Espeon, Raichu, Articuno and Suicune all knocked out, Mary-Sue's now down to HER last Poke'Mon!

Kenta: Wait, she had another one?

Pikachu: Pi . . . . ka . . . . pi . . . . *gasping for breath*

Camera Guy: (Uh-oh, this isn't looking good, man . . . Ash is about to lose, and for the first time, for real! He might have a total breakdown if that were to happen . . . where the hell are Jessie and James?!)

Film Crew Guy: (They just got here this minute. They're warming up that mechanical hand of theirs to grab Pikachu, just have him hang in there a little bit longer until they can grab him. Then the match will be declared indecisive, and we can halfass our way out of this!)

Mary-Sue: okay its my las chanc.....go pika!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!

*Kenta falls over*

Brock: And! The final match . . . Pikachu versus Pikachu!

Kenta: (What the @#$% kind of a name is "Pika" for a Pikachu?!)

Film Crew Guy: (Do I need to gag you?)

Mary-Sue: go pika us tunderbolt!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ash's Voice Actor: You can do it Pikachu! Go, Quick Attack!

Camera Guy: (Do it! Now!)

*A mechanical hand flies in through the window of Norman's gym and snags Pikachu, then begins to pull it away*

Producer: (Idiots! They grabbed the wrong Pikachu!)

Kenta: (Actually though, to be honest they probably got the stronger one anyway.)

Mary-Sue: o no pika fite bak!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

*Pika somehow roots herself to the floor and gives the hand-contraption a mighty yank, pulling the villains on the other end into the picture*

Ash's Voice Actor: It's Team-!

Kenta: -Aqua!

Leros: grr foild agan

Kaira: o wel well stil steel all ther pokmon

Ash: huh who r u

Producer: *Thrown into panic* Oh no! He spoke! Cut the film, cut the film, for @#$% sakes, CUT THE FILM!

Leros: wer teem aqwa

Kaira: ya giv us all ur pokmon

Norman: *Coming into the gym* Ah, nothing like a nice cup of coffee to- *Stops* What the hell? Ugh . . . May, I TOLD you this sort of stuff would happen if you hung around with these people . . .

*End Flashback*

When I started writing this entry, I had a full-lengthed pencil. Now I'm down to a stub, right next to the eraser. Just to be a bastard, I'm gonna end it right here and now, and continue sometime later. Heh, luckily this is only a diary, and nobody's actually reading it. Otherwise, they'd be extraordinarily pissed off right about now.

Until the next entry,
-Kenta

Last edited by Kenta147; 04-09-2007 at 06:26 PM.
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  #23  
Old 04-09-2007, 09:00 PM
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Default Re: Hoenn Insane: The Version of R/S/E You Didn't See

Getting pretty violent. Poor Pikachus...
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  #24  
Old 04-10-2007, 02:04 AM
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Default Re: Hoenn Insane: The Version of R/S/E You Didn't See

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Originally Posted by Piplup123 View Post
THE VCE !!!!!! THE VCE !!!!!!! JON US!!!!!!
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Originally Posted by Piplup123 View Post
ths stry is ttly awsom!!!!
dubl pst dubl pst
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Old 04-11-2007, 06:32 PM
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Default Re: Hoenn Insane: The Version of R/S/E You Didn't See

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sorry.
anyway,this story......RRROOOCCCCCKKKKKKKKKSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!

sorry...again
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The question is...are you? Ryan

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Old 04-11-2007, 07:48 PM
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Default Re: Hoenn Insane: The Version of R/S/E You Didn't See

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Originally Posted by Piplup123 View Post
anyway,this story......RRROOOCCCCCKKKKKKKKKSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!

sorry...again
Wait, did you delete your double post making it look like I was the double poster?
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Old 04-11-2007, 10:42 PM
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Default Re: Hoenn Insane: The Version of R/S/E You Didn't See

Please . . . don't spam in here. Again, thanks for compliments. And now, for the thrilling conclusion!

***

*** Chapter 13: Screw What The Viewers Want ***
Dear Diary,

Hey, it's me again (what, you were expecting Richard Nixon?), and now that I've got a new pencil and my hand isn't cramping up anymore, we can pick up where we left off. Uh . . . where was that? Oh right, we were in Norman's gym, and everything was happening at once.

*Flashback*

Ash: hey u r tos tem aqa peeps ur bad

Producer: What the @#$% are you doing here? You're not supposed to appear again for another twenty or so episodes! God, I'm so stressed . . . where's my crack-pipe? I want my crack-pipe!

Kenta: Leros and Kaira? Okay, if you guys were the ones at the end of the mechanical hand, then where's Team Rocket?

*Scene shifts to Jessie, James, and Meowth, who are bound and gagged, and tied to a tree. Cassidy and Butch, who happen to be passing through the area at the time (on their way to pose as villains for the current Poke'Mon Chronicles episode) stop to laugh at them. "So, all dressed up and nowhere to go, eh?"*

May: ther notso bad then

Kenta: Oh, right, getting rid of a couple of rats by using poisonous snakes is a REAL good method. We're so much better off now.

Brock: This is bad! The Aquas have The Voice, and right now the only goodguys with The Voice are down to just one Poke'Mon left!

Leros/Kaira: hahahahahahahahahahahahaha

Norman: Um . . . has everyone forgotten I'm here?

Kenta: Shuddup Norman, we're kind of in the middle of a crisis here!

Leros: u beter surender now or wel beet u al up wit r pokmon

Kaira: ya go cradant

Leros: go mityena

Camera Guy: I stopped the film, boss. Should I rev 'er back up again?

Producer: *All the way on the other side of the gym with the rest of the film crew* Oh! Uh, sure! Go ahead, if you need us we'll all be back here where godmod Poke'Mon can't mangle us up.

*Mary-Sue, Ash, the Aquas, and May all simultaneously twitch*

Kenta: (What was that all about?)

Ash's Voice Actor: Um . . . (shoot, Pikachu's weak, I'd better get him back up to full strength again.) Pikachu! You can do it, buddy! I believe in you! Let's beat those no-good thieves!

Pikachu: *Miraculously replenished* Pika-CHU!

Mary-Sue: getem pika!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Pika: Pikachu! *Breaks free of mechanical hand*

Leros: uh oh um go tyrantar

Kaira: wer in trobl go gardos

Norman: *As Tyranitar and Gyarados appear beside Mightyena and Crawdaunt* Four against two, that's cheating! Come on, Kenta, let's even the odds!

Kenta: *Lowering Norman's arm* Ummmm . . . relax, dude, that won't be necessary.

Norman: What do you mean?

Mary-Sue/Ash: DOBL PIKCHU TUNDRBLT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1111111111111!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1 *Both Pikachu gather electrical energy, then blow the entire side out of Norman's gym, obviously sending the Aquas and the Rockets flying off into the distance. Insert "ding" star.*

Everyone (except Kenta) : Yay! They did it!

Norman: But who's going to pay for the thousands of dollars of damage done to my gym?

Kenta: Tsk . . . that was anticlimactic. The Aquas were beaten so fast, why'd they even bother coming?

Producer: *Now that it's safe to come out* Hey, we do that all the time, kid. We put Team Rocket into the episode, if only to show that they're still alive, then blow them away even if they've done nothing wrong that particular episode. *huffffffff!* I'm so smart I scare myself sometimes.

Kenta: . . . you're a freak.

Ash's Voice Actor: So . . . uh . . . does this episode count? And more importantly, do I get paid for it?

Film Crew Guy: We can't afford to air this crap as an episode! Ash spoke in his own voice WAY too much, and Pikachu pulled the miraculous-revival-from-pep-talk stunt five times in a row.

Mary-Sue: o cmon

Kenta: Yeah, cut us some slack! Except for overdoing the stuff you usually try, this ought to be good enough. What about the time Charizard broke his wings when fighting Falkner's Pidgeot, and then was STILL able to fly? That was intolerable!

Producer: No, what's intolerable was the banned Dratini Safari Zone episode, where the warden pulled a gun on Ash.

Kenta: Right, because missile launchers and flamethrowers, exposure to children of James's obvious gayness, and the episodes zooming in on Lorelei's enormous boobs are sooooo much more appropriate.

Producer: I stand by my decision. Screw what the viewers want, as long as we keep making good money off them. Pack up boys, we're goin' home!

Mary-Sue: wait cn we finsh r batl

Ash: no pikchus week now btu mabye wel batle agn somday

Pikachu: Kaaa . . . *suddenly battered up*

Kenta: (Now . . . I'm gonna do it now!)

Ash: by marysu i stil lov u

Mary-Sue: i lov u 2 ash

Kenta:

Max: WHAT did you just say?!

Brock: Ash! Was that what you were talking with Mary-Sue about the whole time?

Ash: ye-

Kenta: I can't hear you! I can't hear you! *Holds hands to ears* La-la-la-la-la-la-la!

Camera Guy: Aww, that's sweet . . . and totally disasterous for our show. *Grabs Ash by the leg and drags him out of the gym* Goodbye everybody! I hope you all drop dead!

Kenta: . . . nice people . . .

Norman: My gym's ruined . . .

*Five minutes later*

Kenta: Okay . . . that's an incident I'm going to regret having for the rest of my life. But getting back to business at hand, how about a battle, Norman?

Norman: Are you serious? My wall's in shambles, I just found out my kids were traveling with a bunch of psychotic morons, my wife is going to kill me, and to sum it all up, I spilled coffee down the front of my shirt.

Kenta: So that's a yes?

Norman: *Sigh* Oh, why not? My day can't possibly get any worse.

*Five minutes later*

Mary-Sue: i tink ur da just got wors

*Combusken has Slaking in a headlock (and is giving him a wet willy,) and Gardevoir is meditating on top of a flattened-out Vigoroth*

Kenta: Ready to quit? Or ya thirsty for more?

Norman: You cheated.

Kenta: No I didn't.

Norman: Your Combusken hit Slaking in the eye with one of the film crew's microphone poles!

Kenta: All's fair in the love and war! Now gimme a badge!

Norman: Tsk . . . I hate kids. I never should have allowed myself to be lumped with them.

Kenta: *Pushing Mary-Sue out in front of him* You still have one to go!

Norman: Screw this, just take the badge. Take the whole damn shoe box of badges if you want!

Mary-Sue: wow ty

Kenta: No "ty." We got what we came here for, now let's celebrate and go out for root beers! And NEVER mention you loving Ash again.

Mary-Sue: but its t-

Kenta: *Singing loudly, hands on ears* I know a song that gets on everybody's nerves . . .

*End flashback*

Something bugs me about what happened earlier, before everyone left as fast as they came . . . what was with that sudden odd behavior from those guys earlier?

*Mini-flashback*

Producer: *All the way on the other side of the gym with the rest of the film crew* Oh! Uh, sure! Go ahead, if you need us we'll all be back here where godmod Poke'Mon can't mangle us up.

*Mary-Sue, Ash, the Aquas, and May all simultaneously twitch*

Kenta: (What was that all about?)

*End mini-flashback*

No. Don't ask questions. Everything's better when you don't ask questions. Alright, moving swiftly along, we'll be surfing the waves tomorrow, and I just now remembered that Mary-Sue's got Suicune, so I don't need to use my Surf HM. Oh well . . . maybe I can sell it to someone. Anyway, we're gonna set out for that shipwreck place, and maybe we'll find sunken treasure! Or ghosts! Or more likely, absolutely nothing! Woo-hoo!

Oh, and in case you were wondering, the reason I'm so shocked at Ash liking Mary-Sue is because . . . well, if Ash exists, Misty apparently exists, and have you seen the size of her mallet? Wherever that mallet goes, pain and destruction follow, and I do NOT wanna be caught in the cross-fire. Come to think of it, I wonder if Mary-Sue has a mallet. Boy would that suck.

Forever last to know what's going on,
-Kenta
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  #28  
Old 04-13-2007, 07:54 PM
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Default Re: Hoenn Insane: The Version of R/S/E You Didn't See

Oh... My... GENGAR.... I think my lung just hit my ribgage and popped from all the laughing. Those last two chapters were so true. *sighs* Gosh, I miss the days of good theme songs, characters with personality, and Ash having a voice actor with a good-sounding voice and non-crappy lines.... And anyone who wants to complain about "Oh my Gengar", would you really expect anything less from the kid who's pathologically obsessed with Pokčmon? Well, can't wait for the next chapter, Kenta.
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  #29  
Old 04-15-2007, 12:05 AM
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Default Re: Hoenn Insane: The Version of R/S/E You Didn't See

"Oh my Aruseus" may conform closer to God, since Poke'Mon's gone pagan anymore. As if being existential (Mewtwo movie) wasn't enough. Okay, done ranting.

************************************************** ************************

*** Chapter 14: Is This Legal? ***

Dear Diary,

Hey, it's me again (what, you were expecting Puff the Magic Dragon? Because that's what the Director was doing- puffin' the magic dragon.) Anyway, he lives by the sea, and that's where I'll initiate today, I guess. I wonder if I can do that annoying narrator's voice . . . ahem: "Once again, we find our heroes out on their continued journey to one day become great Poke'Mon masters! Who knows what kind of exciting adventure awaits them today?"

*Flashback*

Kenta: God, I'm so BORED! There's nothing around us but sea, water, and more ocean. What genius decided we'd take the sea route??

Mary-Sue: u did

Kenta: I figured we'd run into people swimming way out here where they could drown and die if they got tired or experienced a cramp. But there's nobody anywhere!

Mary-Sue: mabye their smrt

Kenta: That doesn't sound like the world we live in. Hey, look, there's a guy swimming over there! I knew I was right!

Mary-Sue: ok sucun go 2 him

Random Guy: hi im a swimr i chaleng u 2 a batl

Kenta: No thanks.

Random Guy: wat????????????????????/ but i hav exclmatin makr over my hed

Kenta: But you also have The Voice. I'd rather keep my Poke'Mon alive long enough to get to the next city.

Random Guy: u hav 2 fit me

Kenta: Okay, you keep thinking that. Let's go, Mary-Sue.

Random Guy: o hi marysu

Mary-Sue: hi

Random Guy: u shur mov fast i thot i c u in suknen shp

Mary-Sue: wat?????? i dint go in der yet

Kenta: Sunken ship? Where? *Mary-Sue and Random Guy both point to the half-submerged wreck about twenty yards away* Oh. Well, that's not really a sunken ship, is it? It's only a crapped-up vessel that's only part-way waterlogged.

Mary-Sue: w/e lets go chek it ot

Kenta: Alright, we've got nothing better to do. I wonder why that random guy thought he saw you in the ship?

Random Guy: u wer in der and u guy nevr batld me!!!!!!!!!!!!!11111111111111111!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

*Five minutes later*

Kenta: What a dump! Nobody lives like this except college kids.

Mary-Sue: nobdy livs her

Tourist: Uh . . . y-yeah, nobody. I'm just visiting this ship. Really! That's why I'm a tourist!

Kenta: Riiiight . . . okay, I've got the feeling you've been here for a while, so would you mind telling me how dangerous this place is, on a scale from 1-10?

Tourist: I'll do better than that! There's a sign over there telling you all the places on the ship that are dangerous.

Kenta: "Welcome to the S.S. Sunken! (What a retarded name.) Here are some happy guidelines to follow so that you don't leave in a casket! Rule 1: No jumping on the deck, unless you want to poke yet ANOTHER hole in this wreck and fall through three floors below deck. Rule 2: No using Dive. Yes, there are wild Sharpedo further down there still devouring the last buttmunch to try it."

Mary-Sue: dos it rely say tht

Kenta: Word-for-word. "Rule 3: No breaking down the doors to locked rooms. Violators will be prosecuted. We don't know who's going to enforce this yet, if anyone, so please just behave. Rule 4: No visiting the ship's wine cellar." Hmm . . . looks like this one was added.

Tourist: *Hiding a jug behind his back* Aaaaah! W-wasn't me! But, uh . . . don't go down there! It's behind a locked door, and a vicious Sharpedo guards the entrance!

Mary-Sue: kool!!!!!!!!!!!!1

Kenta: Okay, you know what, let's just go below deck and barge into the rooms, like we would if this were a working ship. *Goofy grin* Maybe some of the guests left behind their wallets.

*Five minutes later*

Mary-Sue: ths dors lokd 2

Kenta: Grrr . . . *pulls out a hairpin* That does it, I'm picking the lock!

Mary-Sue: but teh ruls sed th-

Kenta: They said not to break down the doors. Well, I'm just gonna cheat it a little, and . . . presto! We're in!

Mary-Sue: y do u hav a harpin

Kenta: *Pointing to the back of his head* Long hair. Okay, let's raid the dressers . . . shoot, no panties! Someone beat me to them. Mary-Sue, check the closet and tell me if you find anything worthwhile.

Mary-Sue: is ths legl

Kenta: It's legal enough. Go, Combusken! *Flash!* You help, too. Seach under the beds, tell me if you find a gold watch or something.

Combusken: *Translation* I know I just saw a crab claw poke out from under there . . . YOU check!

Mary-Sue: hey ketna i fond a secrt paseg

Kenta: (That didn't sound like "wallet") . . . wait, what?

Mary-Sue: thers som stares goin donw

Kenta: COOL! I wonder if it leads to a room full of smuggled goods . . .

Mary-Sue: *As they start to walk down* mabye it gos 2 teh win celer war the garding sharpdo is

Kenta: Are you telling me you believed that drunkard? There's a reason he was here with no boat to get home, y'know. Hey, uh, it's getting dark, give us a little light, Combusken.

Mary-Sue: wer at botom of stares now war r we

Mysterious Voice: Welcome, Mary-Sue. I've been waiting for you. *Lights click on*

Kenta: WOAH! . . . this ship WAS illegally smuggling stuff! It's the banned Dratini episode, stacks and stacks of it! And here's the banned Porgyon episode, and this is the original Raikou movie, and here's some top-secret junk about Poke'Mon D/P, and-

Anti-Sue: Dammit Kenta, you completely ruined my dramatic entrance!

Mary-Sue: o no its antisu

Anti-Sue: (That's better.) Yes, Mary-Sue, it's been a while. I knew your curiosity would draw you down here.

Kenta: *In the background* 'Scuse me! Does anyone have a working T.V., a DVD player, and some batteries?

Anti-Sue: Kenta, will you shut up for a second?! Ahem . . . as I was saying, I knew your curiosity would draw you down here, and now I'm going to take you back to where you belong- the lab!

Mary-Sue: nevr!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ! go espon

Anti-Sue: Resistance is futile! Come out, Umbreon!

Kenta: *Holding the plug to a television he's found* I need to find an outlet-eon!

Mary-Sue/Anti-Sue: ATTACK!!

*End Flashback*

So, for the second time, we encountered Anti-Sue, and this time she was determined to take down Mary-Sue right then and there. If I wasn't so busy looking for the remote control, I would have been a bit more concerned about it. I don't know why there's a grudge between them, or why there's a laboratory involved in the matter, but for now, I'm just going to do what I always do and not ask questions. It's not like they ever get answered.

Until the next entry,
-Kenta

Last edited by Kenta147; 04-19-2007 at 09:16 PM.
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  #30  
Old 04-15-2007, 07:01 AM
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Default Re: Hoenn Insane: The Version of R/S/E You Didn't See

Wow, the discovery of Ash's voice being done by a woman, it reminds me of the Munsters when Eddie Munster saw for himself how they did that monster character with all the make up and such! I never forgot how Eddie exposed the guy and wrecked the set. I saw a rerun of Sabrina the Teenaged Witch where Sabrina was sent to a western era and a had a confrontation with 'anti-Sabrina.'
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