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Creative Writing Share your fan fiction, stories, poems, essays, editorials, song lyrics, or any other related written work. All written must be your creation. Start a new thread, and keep replying to that thread as you add on more chapters. Anyone can join in at anytime.

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Old 04-23-2004, 10:20 PM
Berserk Murkrow Offline
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Post An Untitled Journey

((A few things. Yes, it is supposed to be called An Untitled Journey. Yes, this is a journey fiction and it takes place in my own land known as Ljito. Also, I think this is my best, if not longest, chapter I have ever written.))

Chapter One

For a while now, I have admired one person: Lauren, the current Pokemon champion. Her most powerful Pokemon Milotic had defeated the entire Elite Four by itself. The invulnerable titan even managed to defeat the Electric Master Carson.

I looked up from my bed at her poster. She stood there, blonde pigtails flailing in the air and arm outstretched as she gave the peace sign. Her various Water Pokemon were pictured along with her: Milotic, Whiscash, Lanturn, Lapras, Ludicolo, and Gyarados.

I then sat up on my bed, looking out of the window next to my bed.

My dad, Gordon, was outside, giving his Zangoose and Arcanine a bath. My dad stood 6’04” or 6’05”, brown and short hair, vibrant blue eyes, and a typical middle age man’s body.

I got off my bed and walked to the mirror in my room. My hair was unkempt and blonde, running down to my ears. My eyes were glassy green, large and round. I wore a short sleeved hoodie with a plain yellow tee shirt beneath it, jean shorts that ran past my knees, and usually went barefooted.

I awoke the next morning with the blazing noise of my Dad’s Arcanine’s howl. I pulled on a tee shirt and crawled down the stairs to our dining room. My breakfast was set on our counter, the scrambled eggs steaming.

My movements were quick to the plate, picking it up and running to a stool. I quickly stuffed the eggs in my mouth as if I have never eating before.

“Joe, slow down or you’ll choke,” a piping female voice said. I turned to see my dad’s girlfriend Yvonne standing in the doorway of the dining room. I waved and continued to eat. “So, are you going to school today?”

“Nah, school gowf ouf earlsh so they cauld startsh remodeling the school,” I answered with my mouth full of eggs. She just giggled and placed the bags she was carrying on the table next to me. Then, my dad appeared behind Yvonne, grasping her arms together.

“Hey sweetie,” my dad said, kissing her on the cheek. I made fake puking noises, letting the chewed eggs fall to the plate. The lovebirds just laughed and disappeared into the kitchen.

Then, the phone began to ring. I jumped from my chair, and answered it.

“JOE!” It was my friend Marissa.

“Whoa! Calm down! What’s up?” I answered.

“You haven’t heard? The Pokemon Center is giving away abandoned Pokemon for adoption. I just went down there and got a Makuhita,” she answered.

“Wha-wha-wha!” I stuttered. For a long time I have wanted to get a Pokemon. “Well, do they still have Pokemon?”

“They’re going fast so you better hurry,” Marissa said. Then, in the background, I heard her Makuhita chanting it’s name. Marissa then giggled and returned to the phone. “Well, I have to go start training my Makuhita. I’m thinking of leaving school to start a journey.”

“Ok, bye. I think I’m going to the PokeCenter right now,” I answered. I hung the phone up and ran into the kitchen, placing my half full plate on the counter.

“Hey, why you moving so fast Joe?” my dad asked. He continued to grasp Yvonne who had already started dinner.

“Well, Marissa just called me. She said they’re giving out abandoned Pokemon for adoption,” I answered. “I wanted to run down there real quick and see if there is any Pokemon worth adopting.”

My dad’s smile disappeared. “Aren’t you a little young to be getting a Pokemon. I didn’t get my Growlithe until I was 16.”

“Dad, I’m 12 now. Most of my friends have already left on their journeys. I think I’m ready,” I answered with my normal angst.

“Oh Gordon. Let him go. I got my first Pokemon when I was 10,” Yvonne said, defending me.

My dad sighed and looked at me. “Fine, but I want you to come back home before you leave. You understand me young man.” He said with a stern face. I smiled and ran up to my dad, hugging him. I then ran to Yvonne and hugged her and said thank. I then quickly sprinted up the stairs, throwing on the nearest clothes. I tossed on some flip-flops and a hat.

Soon, I was out of the house into the blazing sun. It must of been at least 80 degrees outside. The trees waxy leaves shined in the intense violet rays. The tiny Taillow and Sentret scurried past me, disappearing into someone’s yard. Coming up soon was the Pokemon Center, just a quarter of a mile from where I was. As I started my climb up the small hill that the Center was built on, I heard a flurry of loud talking and yells.

Extending from the entrance of the PokeCenter was a long line of my classmates, some carrying empty PokeBalls and other accompanied by their parents.

“Oh man. I hope there will be a Pokemon left for me,” I said. I got behind my classmate Peggy, a pudgy girl wearing a pink shirt and some capris.

One after another, another one of my classmates went in and out of the Center holding various Pokemon: Oddish, Mareep, Treecko, Dunsparce, and Totodiles.

After thirty minutes of waiting, I was very close to the Tiny Rose Town Center door. Then, Peggy went inside, her pudgy face stuck with a large smile. I sat there waiting, tapping my foot on the dirt path. It seemed like forever before Peggy came out, a Sudowoodo walking behind her. Then, Nurse Joy came to the door and waved me in. I smiled and walked to the automatic door, which opened when I got close.

When I got inside, numerous cages littered the normally clean Pokemon Center. I saw Girafarig, Marril, Hoppip, Remoraid, Seviper, Yanma, and other Pokemon. I wasn’t interested in any of them, walking along the cages. I saw the empty cage that Marissa’s Makuhita had been in. A Smeargle cage was next to it, followed by numerous Wurmple, Silcoon, and Cascoon in a cage. I liked those Pokemon, but not as a starting Pokemon.

I saw one boy named Jeremy jumping up and down outside of a Torkoal’s cage. I said hi and walked by.

My emotions were quickly going downhill as I didn’t see any Pokemon I liked. Then I noticed some cages stuffed into a corner. I walked over to them and peeked inside. There, nestled in the corner of the cage were some Nidorans, both female and male. That’s the Pokemon I wanted, a Nidoran!

I looked for one I think I could get along with the best. Most were timid and quiet, sleeping or eating.

I looked to the other side of the cage to one particular male Nidoran. He was clawing and nibbling at the side of the cage. I smiled. This one seemed quite energetic and outgoing, and wanting to get out of the cage.

“Nurse Joy! Hey, Nurse Joy!” I yelled. Quickly, Nurse Joy scurried over to me, holding two Swablu in her arms.

“Hi, can I help you?” She seemed to be out of breath and having a hard time holding the mischievous Swablu.

“Yes, I was wondering if I could take one of these Nidoran,” I asked.

“Oh, those poor Nidoran. We found them abandoned and sick in a tree burrow. Now, which one would you like?” she said, handing off the Swablu to a Chansey. I leaned over, pointing at the Nidoran who was still clawing at the cage wall. “Well, he’s quite the energetic one.” She opened the cage top and carefully picked up the Nidoran, trying not to touch the poison barbs.

I followed her to the main desk as she placed the Nidoran on the counter. I began to pet the Nidoran softly as she typed furiously in the computer.

“Ok, are you a registered as a trainer yet?” she asked.

“Uhh... no,” I said, looking up from the Nidoran.

Joy smiled, “Well, in order to have a Pokemon, you have to register.” Again, she began to type furiously on the computer. Nidoran had walked away from me, curiously staring at the computer. He poked at the keyboard gently with his toxic horn. Joy pushed him away with a giggle. I grabbed him and pulled him closer to me.

“Now, I need to take your picture. So, stand still,” she said. A digital camera appeared from beneath the counter. I gave my best smiled as the camera flashed.

She typed a few more times and then the computer made a noise.

Soon, the printer next to the computer began to make noise and a license was soon printed. I grabbed the laminated paper quickly, placing it in my big pockets. “Now, Mr. Martin, I’m ordering you a PokeDex. It should be in your mailbox tomorrow.”

“Thanks,” I said. She then handed me a PokeBall for Nidoran. “Well, I’m going.” She waved to me and then immediately ran to another classmate.

Nidoran was running alongside me on my way home. The sun was still blazing, right at the noon position.

“Well Nidoran, I think my dad will be a little surprised by my choice of Pokemon. Poison Pokemon are definitely not his favorite,” I said to Nidoran. “But, I know if you behave, he’ll like you.”

Then we continued home, and soon we were inside. Dad was the first person I saw when I got inside.

“You got a Poison Pokemon? You know how I feel about them,” he said, wearily eying the Poison Pin Pokemon. Nidoran walked up to Dad and began to rub against his trunk of legs with his sensitive ears.

“Well, I guess he’s ok. C’mon, Yvonne finished dinner,” Dad said. I followed him into the dining room to eat another one of Yvonne’s masterpieces. There were potatoes, chicken, peas, and salads.

I sat down in my usual chair next to Dad and his two Pokemon. Yvonne sat to my other side and began to serve dinner. Nidoran then leaped up on my lap, and tried to get into my food. I slapped his nose gently.

Then, a pain shot throughout my body. I looked at my dad and tried to say something, but my jaw felt weak. My vision became blurry and my muscles started to tense up. I felt my back giving way and then my head began it’s descent to the table. I blacked out just before my head hit the table.

Praetor of Murkrows...

Also known as The King of Water Pokemon on other Forums.

The Greediest of all Murkrows!
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Old 04-23-2004, 11:54 PM
Phoenix004 Offline
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Default Re: An Untitled Journey

Great start Murkrow, I love the suspense at the end. The story is looking very good so far, it'd be interesting to see what happens next. I wonder what's going to happen to Joe?

"Remember, battles may be won or lost but if the battlers do not learn, the battle served no purpose."
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Old 04-24-2004, 08:03 AM
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Dr Skottie Offline
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Default Re: An Untitled Journey

Originally Posted by Phoenix004
Great start Murkrow, I love the suspense at the end. The story is looking very good so far, it'd be interesting to see what happens next. I wonder what's going to happen to Joe?
Hey, I agree with Phoenix, this is a very good start, i love it so far. Very well written, I'll be watching this one closely...
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Old 04-24-2004, 05:40 PM
KCash Offline
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Default Re: An Untitled Journey

That was a great start! Not many fics will start off like this, usually its just 'go to Professor (Tree)'s house and get a pokemon and off you go' but this was nothing like it, very unorginal.. really caught my attention.

I hate the cliffhanger though... I want to know what happened! Great job!

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Old 04-29-2004, 01:15 AM
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Cody Offline
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Default Re: An Untitled Journey

Can you start doing more? This thread is getting old...

BEGINNER'S TRINITY (coming not so soon to a fanfic section near you)


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Old 04-29-2004, 04:07 AM
HondoomMaster Offline
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Default Re: An Untitled Journey

Great start man. I have an idea what happened, well Nidoran was abused by another trainer. The trainer that abanded him, than Joe smacked Nidoran, it acted upon hatred to his original owner and thought his new trainer was going to abuse and abanden him also. So he poked him with his poison barb, am I good?
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