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Stories Write a story to catch Pokemon. A Grader will then decide if it catches or not.


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  #1  
Old 01-27-2007, 03:12 AM
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Default Lake o' Trash

Lake o' Trash



I had spent many a days fishing off of the Lake of Rage for the fascinating fish that dwelled in it’s light brown murky water. The parts where the land met the water were all covered with well rounded rocks that were created by the water that crashing up against them. It was hard to imagine what the lake had first looked like because over one hundred years of industry settling in the area, pollution was really starting to kick in. The near Pokeball factory had black smoke in big stacks pouring out it constantly, as if it were battling to see how much it could make.

It also seemed that the people were getting lazier and just throwing their trash any old place that was around them. There were trash cans, but it seemed nobody could see them out in the open. Very strange this was. I could understand why the wonderful red scale fish weren’t biting now. Pollution and trash, who would want to live there.

It made me ponder on how fish could move. Did they use their evolutionary skills to simply grow little legs and walk off. At that moment, I pictured a round Magikarp with little legs at the bottom of it. It actually reminded me of a Sushi vendor dressed up in a fish suit. Fish need water to breathe, so the karp with legs was blown out of the water, literally.

Maybe there were underground tunnels that linked from one rive, lake, or ocean to another. It was very possible and maybe one day, someone will find one. I reeled my line back in and baited it with another piece of oddly square cabbage full with chalk white at t left hand corner and settled down into a light green at the other three corners. I grasped the cork handled rod and winged the light white fishing line out into the deep dark water.

Within in a few minutes my line had sunk a good bit under the water. I felt like I was wasting my time, but I had nothing better to do. I looked at the water and it seemed as if my line were moving slightly. Maybe I was seeing things, but it stopped as soon as it came. Once again, my line was pulled a little bit.

This puzzled me to extremes. The line seemed to be zig zagging and doing the tango in the water. I couldn’t help but to laugh to myself. I jerked on the rod and started reeling in like a mad man. My hand was frantically spinning in circles in excitement. Finally, it came to the jagged shore and jumped out of the water. I couldn’t believe it, but I had indeed caught a Magikarp on a fishing rod that is but though.

I threw the pole down and the round red fish with gold look alike stingers around it’s mouth flopped around on shore constantly shouting “Karp, Karp, Karp Karp Karp!”. I unfastened the Pokeball which held the hand bladed green bug, Scyther. I tossed it to the ground and out it came in a blink of an eye. It stared at the fish that was mindlessly wiggling on shore and turned back to me.

“Scy!?” It said this in a confused manner. It raised it’s winged arms up saying it’s confused with body language.

“Just hold it for me, knock it out, or do something with it.” Scyther unhooked the fish from the fishing pole, somehow or another and picked it up. It was about ready to toss it back into the lake when I tossed a Lure Ball at it. A red lighting bolt shot out and grabbed the fish taking it back into the ball with it. Scyther stood there confused but the ball jiggled once, twice,…….
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Old 01-27-2007, 03:17 AM
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Default Re: Lake o' Trash(Needs Grading)

Introduction, Length, & Plot: The background was interesting, the character was delightfully mysterious- We don't even find out if it's a boy or a girl- and for a Magikarp, the simple plot and small length were sufficient.

Other: Scyther's confusion at what to do with the 'karp was cute, and as Magikarp can't really fight, that was fine for a battle against one. All in all, a neat little story, very nice and compact. ;) Though, more complicated pokemon would require a bit of a more complex plot than fishing, finding a pokemon by fishing, then catching it.

There's really not much to say as Magikarp stories don't have to be very long, but overall, it was good. ^__^ Very nice for a first story, too- Most people have terrible grammar the first time around!

Magikarp Captured.
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Old 01-27-2007, 03:22 AM
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Default Re: Lake o' Trash(Needs Grading)

Thanks for the grading. The next story I choose to write we shall find out about the character...or maybe we won't. It shall be better but though.

-O
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