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Creative Writing Share your fan fiction, stories, poems, essays, editorials, song lyrics, or any other related written work. All written must be your creation. Start a new thread, and keep replying to that thread as you add on more chapters. Anyone can join in at anytime.


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  #1486  
Old 05-10-2011, 01:31 PM
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Default Re: Team StormRiders [PG-13] [Gold; Best Pokemon Author; MotY'10]

Quote:
Originally Posted by Kumori Gem View Post
Well, yeah, kinda. And I get what you're saying. But I don't have to use a semi-colon or whatever in every instance like that. I think it depends on the person/editor for books. What I've seen is in some books a person will use a semi-colon/dash etc. and others won't. Personal preference, I guess. xD
Well for sentences that aren't connected with a word like 'and' or 'as' or 'so' or 'but' or whatever which have commas generally are two separate sentence, and in that instance the correct grammatical device would be a semicolon. Something like:

Quote:
I don't think that's a good idea, we should go to the cheese factory.
Something like that needs a semicolon or a joining word, because both sides of the commas are sentences that can stand on their own. Only when both sides of the comma don't stand on their own should the comma be correct, such as:

Quote:
Because not all the trees and shrubs meet up, there shall be no pie.
That's a bad example. But at least the first half of the sentence can't stand on its own and make sense.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Kumori Gem View Post
Yup, I know, I got it. It's just that in my view I think I would use the word dog. Considering they are dog-like creatures. I'm giving my Pokemon knowledge to know what animals are. xD There are regular bugs and stuff in Talzere, too.
But do you think that, if dogs existed alongside pokemon, people would compare pokemon with dogs anyway? Wouldn't they refer to dogs as 'glaceon-like' instead of the other way around, or both ways? I just wouldn't expect them to know what dogs are in order to compare them, or to think to compare them with something similar, since pokemon would have come first to them, like how animals came first to us. o.o I'd think they'd compare animals to pokemon.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Kumori Gem View Post
Nope, it's okay. Did I miss that part? xD Sorry.
I'm just repeating myself anyway. xD

Quote:
Originally Posted by Kumori Gem View Post
So much stuff to do and writing has to come second. *sigh* ;_____;
It sucks, doesn't it? D:
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  #1487  
Old 05-28-2011, 07:02 AM
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Default Re: Pokemon: Team StormRiders [PG-13] [Gold; Best Pokemon Author; MotY'10]

Lol. Double post.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kumori Gem View Post
His mother drew forward and cupped a hand under his chin, lifting his face to meet hers.
Elekid don't have chins...their head and bodies are connected. o.o

Second post:

Quote:
Originally Posted by Kumori Gem View Post
Tali closed her eyes with sorrow, not wishing for the Weavile to see the tears that slipped down her fur as he walked off with her thrown over his shoulder. Rakai, what have you become?
Was that last part supposed to be in italics (thoughts)?

There were many other errors I could have pointed out, but I decided not to since I didn't think you'd be interested. x3

There are a few things that concern me... Was Ameli a figment of Rye's imagination? She seemed too real to be. She answered his questions and provided him with comfort; I doubt he could have created that from his own mind, so I'm thinking these dream characters are partly real, somehow.

Second, how did Zanna guess it was Virok so easily? I can't remember if Rye told her about the dark pokemon that were there when he was a child, or if that part was when he had just arrived in the dream world place. I wouldn't think Zanna could be so suspicious of him based on almost nothing, especially if she had no idea about how he's training dark pokemon. I might have forgotten some key thing here. xD

When Rakai slung Tali over his shoulder, why didn't she struggle or do anything? She seemed to just sit there (and also let herself be taken). Yet she wasn't too injured or something (and thus was unable to resist), so I'm kind of confused as to how he managed to take her away without a struggle.

But yeah... I really wonder where Jarre and co. are. o: And we haven't seen Scythe or Raze or any of them in ages! I wonder what they're up to these days? xD And same with Jirachi and Sierra. Sierra? I think that was it. xD And that alakazam with a cane...that he used to whack Jirachi on the head. xD LOL.

Butcha. :P I hope Lani doesn't get injured by those weird red-eyed pokemon. D: She's kind of...unconscious...and unable to protect herself. xD Let's hope Codan and the others arrive to protect her! And I wonder what Rakai was hoping to achieve by shoving Tali into a cage. xD I'm kind of annoyed at Tali for leaving Lani alone... She's a bit irresponsible. And I know that nothing good can come of Virok and his caging Zanna.

~GS.
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Last edited by Graceful_Suicune; 05-28-2011 at 07:07 AM.
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  #1488  
Old 05-28-2011, 01:20 PM
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Default Re: Pokemon: Team StormRiders [PG-13] [Gold; Best Pokemon Author; MotY'10]

Quote:
Originally Posted by Graceful_Suicune View Post
Lol. Double post.


Elekid don't have chins...their head and bodies are connected. o.o

Second post:



Was that last part supposed to be in italics (thoughts)?

There were many other errors I could have pointed out, but I decided not to since I didn't think you'd be interested. x3

There are a few things that concern me... Was Ameli a figment of Rye's imagination? She seemed too real to be. She answered his questions and provided him with comfort; I doubt he could have created that from his own mind, so I'm thinking these dream characters are partly real, somehow.

Second, how did Zanna guess it was Virok so easily? I can't remember if Rye told her about the dark pokemon that were there when he was a child, or if that part was when he had just arrived in the dream world place. I wouldn't think Zanna could be so suspicious of him based on almost nothing, especially if she had no idea about how he's training dark pokemon. I might have forgotten some key thing here. xD

When Rakai slung Tali over his shoulder, why didn't she struggle or do anything? She seemed to just sit there (and also let herself be taken). Yet she wasn't too injured or something (and thus was unable to resist), so I'm kind of confused as to how he managed to take her away without a struggle.

But yeah... I really wonder where Jarre and co. are. o: And we haven't seen Scythe or Raze or any of them in ages! I wonder what they're up to these days? xD And same with Jirachi and Sierra. Sierra? I think that was it. xD And that alakazam with a cane...that he used to whack Jirachi on the head. xD LOL.

Butcha. :P I hope Lani doesn't get injured by those weird red-eyed pokemon. D: She's kind of...unconscious...and unable to protect herself. xD Let's hope Codan and the others arrive to protect her! And I wonder what Rakai was hoping to achieve by shoving Tali into a cage. xD I'm kind of annoyed at Tali for leaving Lani alone... She's a bit irresponsible. And I know that nothing good can come of Virok and his caging Zanna.

~GS.
Well technically, no, they don't have chins. xD But it seems odd to like, not have a chin or something. I don't know, I guess I still write about them like they're sorta human. x3

Yes, that was meant to be in italics. xD I thought I'd changed it but I guess not.

What Rye saw was his mother summoned from his subconscious, yes, like the other figments from his past. But more than that, because Darkrai is controlling (partly) his nightmare, he can create illusions that are more real. However, if Rye's will is strong enough he can override Darkrai's illusions so they can be seen in a positive light...I don't even think that makes sense to you. XD Oh well, I tried.

Rye told Zanna a while ago (in the letter and beforehand, I think) that his father was creating an army of dark Pokemon, hence Zanna already had suspicions he had something to do with it. I mean, it was just a guess she threw at Virok, but it was right because he ended up telling her it was him anyway. xD

Tali's a little distraught by the whole thing. She was too mentally unstable to do much. I'll clear this up later on, but the Buizel has a lot on her mind right now. Just that she was too weak to fight back. And I don't mean physically, I mean mentally.

I loved Alakazam. xD The old guy with the cane, haha. And yeah, they'll come back later. There's too many things for me to fit into this story, so perhaps in the sequel. Or perhaps I should write less complex stories. XD Maybe.

Lani's a tough one, she ought to be okay...when she comes to. =x You'll see the others soon enough as well. Tali isn't the best Pokemon to have around, no. I kind of hate her to be honest. xD I love that I can create characters I hate as well as like. She's really quite stubborn. Then again, she and Zanna have that in common. x3
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  #1489  
Old 05-29-2011, 12:47 AM
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Default Re: Pokemon: Team StormRiders [PG-13] [Gold; Best Pokemon Author; MotY'10]

Wow, you replied to nearly everything. xD
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kumori Gem View Post
Well technically, no, they don't have chins. xD But it seems odd to like, not have a chin or something. I don't know, I guess I still write about them like they're sorta human. x3

Yes, that was meant to be in italics. xD I thought I'd changed it but I guess not.

What Rye saw was his mother summoned from his subconscious, yes, like the other figments from his past. But more than that, because Darkrai is controlling (partly) his nightmare, he can create illusions that are more real. However, if Rye's will is strong enough he can override Darkrai's illusions so they can be seen in a positive light...I don't even think that makes sense to you. XD Oh well, I tried.
xD That's what I was saying. But, however, I could imagine her placing a paw on his skin under his mouth. Uhh, yeah. Definitely human-like. x3 Which is why you need to keep in mind that these are definitely not human--they're pokemon.

Ahh, right, I see. Was that explained, or was it more ambiguous? Well, of course I understand it now, since you just explained it, but I had no idea before.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Kumori Gem View Post
Rye told Zanna a while ago (in the letter and beforehand, I think) that his father was creating an army of dark Pokemon, hence Zanna already had suspicions he had something to do with it. I mean, it was just a guess she threw at Virok, but it was right because he ended up telling her it was him anyway. xD

Tali's a little distraught by the whole thing. She was too mentally unstable to do much. I'll clear this up later on, but the Buizel has a lot on her mind right now. Just that she was too weak to fight back. And I don't mean physically, I mean mentally.
Ahh, right. I see. Makes more sense now. The reason I keep questioning things is just to clear it up, not to prove you wrong or be like "You suck!" or anything. xDDD

I think you could have gotten that across more clearly; although she did seem to have some sort of a breakdown, it wasn't entirely clear that her emotions were the reason she was taken so easily. Yeah, I know. xD

Quote:
Originally Posted by Kumori Gem View Post
I loved Alakazam. xD The old guy with the cane, haha. And yeah, they'll come back later. There's too many things for me to fit into this story, so perhaps in the sequel. Or perhaps I should write less complex stories. XD Maybe.

Lani's a tough one, she ought to be okay...when she comes to. =x You'll see the others soon enough as well. Tali isn't the best Pokemon to have around, no. I kind of hate her to be honest. xD I love that I can create characters I hate as well as like. She's really quite stubborn. Then again, she and Zanna have that in common. x3
Ahaha, yeah, he was great. Pretty much. :P I just remember him whacking Jirachi on the head. xD Just wondering. ;3 Well it depends how long you think you can make it. xD No, writing less complex stories is definitely not the answer. Not that you were seriously considering it, but yeah. A sequel, hey?

Yeah. :3 Go Lani. Well, in all fairness she was preoccupied, but she also didn't seem to care much about Lani and put her personal troubles before the safety of others... I don't hate her. I don't hate anyone so far. xD Oh, really? I've never hated any of my characters... I figure that if I let my emotion get in the way of my writing, then I might not portray them correctly. I dunno; I like all my characters, no matter how they are. xD Yes, yes they do.

~GS
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  #1490  
Old 05-29-2011, 02:00 AM
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Default Re: Pokemon: Team StormRiders [PG-13] [Gold; Best Pokemon Author; MotY'10]

Quote:
Originally Posted by Graceful_Suicune View Post
Wow, you replied to nearly everything. xD


xD That's what I was saying. But, however, I could imagine her placing a paw on his skin under his mouth. Uhh, yeah. Definitely human-like. x3 Which is why you need to keep in mind that these are definitely not human--they're pokemon.

Ahh, right, I see. Was that explained, or was it more ambiguous? Well, of course I understand it now, since you just explained it, but I had no idea before.



Ahh, right. I see. Makes more sense now. The reason I keep questioning things is just to clear it up, not to prove you wrong or be like "You suck!" or anything. xDDD

I think you could have gotten that across more clearly; although she did seem to have some sort of a breakdown, it wasn't entirely clear that her emotions were the reason she was taken so easily. Yeah, I know. xD



Ahaha, yeah, he was great. Pretty much. :P I just remember him whacking Jirachi on the head. xD Just wondering. ;3 Well it depends how long you think you can make it. xD No, writing less complex stories is definitely not the answer. Not that you were seriously considering it, but yeah. A sequel, hey?

Yeah. :3 Go Lani. Well, in all fairness she was preoccupied, but she also didn't seem to care much about Lani and put her personal troubles before the safety of others... I don't hate her. I don't hate anyone so far. xD Oh, really? I've never hated any of my characters... I figure that if I let my emotion get in the way of my writing, then I might not portray them correctly. I dunno; I like all my characters, no matter how they are. xD Yes, yes they do.

~GS
Yeah, I know. I'm really bad for that kinda thing. xD I don't really 'think' when I write, so much as imagine things in my mind. I could say 'under his mouth' or something, I kinda forgot Elekid's didn't have chins. XD *scratches head* Now that I imagine it, if she lifts up his chin his whole body might follow. XDDDDDDDD

And no, it wasn't explained anywhere, because it hasn't been explained yet. xD I like keeping readers in the dark about a few things until it's the right time to explain it. I was planning to explain the whole thing a little further in. xD

Nah, it's fine. It's been so long I think most people have forgotten. xD It's good to clear some things up.

Yeah. I could re-write it later to convey that part more clearly. Again, some things I have to say later will clear that up. xD

Nope, definitely not writing less complex stories. I couldn't if I tried, anyway. xD And yeah, a sequel. I have the end of this one planned out, and little things in between, but they're all subject to change. And the main purpose of the sequel I have in my head. If anything, I'd love for this arc to be like a trilogy, but I just won't have time to write it all. I'm a little slow. xD So it would take me like 10 years just to write them all. XD But aw well.

Well maybe hate is the wrong word. I can still portray everyone effectively; my opinion doesn't affect that. But they feel so alive now. If Tali was here I'll probably just flick her on the nose and tell her to stop being such a bossy little thing. XD But I know what she's like (cause I created her) and soon everyone else can read up on her, too. Next chapter, I think it is, or the one after, explains a lot about her. So yeah. xD
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  #1491  
Old 06-10-2011, 06:09 PM
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Default Re: Team StormRiders [PG-13] [Gold; Best Pokemon Author; MotY'10]

Hooray for late reading. XP

But the beginning stuck out to me more. Rye's part was so sad, especially when his mother faded away, so sad.

All I can say about Zanna is that she screwed up bad. Let's see how she's going to get out of this little problem.

Taliana, nice name. :3 Does this mean Tali's going to lose some of that tough-girl act she had going? XD
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  #1492  
Old 06-12-2011, 05:19 AM
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Default Re: Team StormRiders [PG-13] [Gold; Best Pokemon Author; MotY'10]

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Originally Posted by FrozenPika View Post
Hooray for late reading. XP

But the beginning stuck out to me more. Rye's part was so sad, especially when his mother faded away, so sad.

All I can say about Zanna is that she screwed up bad. Let's see how she's going to get out of this little problem.

Taliana, nice name. :3 Does this mean Tali's going to lose some of that tough-girl act she had going? XD
At the beginning I had inspiration. xD I kind of lost it towards the end and no matter how long I waited (which was ages) I couldn't find it again. So I just had to put it up as it was to move onto the next chapter. But yeah, the first time the poor guy gets to see his mother in so long and she had to leave him again. D: How hard would that be...

Yes, Zanna did screw up bad. xD But hopefully she's learning! She just wanted to prove that she could handle things, but by trying to do that she just ended up putting everyone else in danger, too. Silly girl!

Tali's name is actually quite sweet. x3 I adore it. And I dunno. Maybe, maybe not. You shall see in the next chapter! ...Which I should probably get to soon. xD

Thank you for reading~ <3
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  #1493  
Old 06-12-2011, 09:27 AM
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Default Re: Team StormRiders [PG-13] [Gold; Best Pokemon Author; MotY'10]

Quote:
Originally Posted by Kumori Gem View Post
At the beginning I had inspiration. xD I kind of lost it towards the end and no matter how long I waited (which was ages) I couldn't find it again. So I just had to put it up as it was to move onto the next chapter. But yeah, the first time the poor guy gets to see his mother in so long and she had to leave him again. D: How hard would that be...

Yes, Zanna did screw up bad. xD But hopefully she's learning! She just wanted to prove that she could handle things, but by trying to do that she just ended up putting everyone else in danger, too. Silly girl!

Tali's name is actually quite sweet. x3 I adore it. And I dunno. Maybe, maybe not. You shall see in the next chapter! ...Which I should probably get to soon. xD

Thank you for reading~ <3
Oh it happens to the best of us, no worries. X3

I can kind of imagine that, maybe that's why it hit me so hard.

She made a bad call and well, has to live with it now. XD

Cool. :3

No problem, loving the story. :D
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  #1494  
Old 06-22-2011, 04:25 AM
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Default Re: Team StormRiders [PG-13] [Gold; Best Pokemon Author; MotY'10]

----------

Chapter 34;
..............captured


----------

My feet and paws scuffled uncomfortably next to my side. They were bound tightly with first-class ropes so I could not move an inch. The mouth of Nadal the Persian quivered ever so slightly as I wriggled within, but it always kept a firm hold of my all-too-fragile body. She uttered not a sound, nor did she question Virok’s command when he had told her to take me to the holding cells.

From the look of the dilapidated halls I could tell we were travelling further underground. There were no windows carved within the stone, only oddly shaped lanterns that hung from the ceiling. The light they gave was low and dim, but it was sufficient for anyone traversing the corridors.

I had soon found it was useless to struggle, as every time I tried several pairs of sharp fangs indented themselves into my body. It seemed my wounds would never heal at this stage, if I kept running into trouble like I had been.

As Nadal’s footsteps died down my ears picked up the faint sound of whimpering and the scent of blood rose to crinkle my nose. I now recognised the smell all too well, for someone who had once never been acquainted with it.

Within a moment the Persian rounded a corner and stepped into a large room laden with cells, all with the same grey bars. From what I could glance as Nadal steered me past the cells, each only contained a single window. There was nothing to sit on, albeit the moss that grew from between the stone cracks. The only light came from a tiny, flickering lantern housed within a single cell to the far right. The closer we came to the light, the stronger the scent of blood grew. It was then that I recognised who’s it was.

Nadal halted by the cell and opened her jaw to release me. Being unable to break my fall, I crashed to the ground in a heap and rolled until my face hit the bleak metal bars, a sharp cry emitting from my mouth. I cringed and opened my eyes, a familiar sight slowly blurring into focus. But it was none I was too happy to see, and my stomach lurched in response. Tali.
The Buizel was covered in cuts and bruises, the dried blood she’d neglected to clean staining her once bright orange fur. She didn’t even glance up at our approach, but remained huddled in a far corner of the cell, knees drawn up to her chin. I had never seen her as vulnerable as she was at this moment. Tali was usually full of fire, but now…she seemed almost lost.

I thought it would be worth calling out to her, maybe I could do something, anything. “He-” But just as I opened my mouth Nadal’s paw crunched down on my tail, silencing any words I had been about to utter. I winced at the pain but didn’t give the Persian the satisfaction of hearing me cry out, instead biting my tongue between my teeth. It didn’t help that the part she hit had been exactly where Rye had broken it, and it still wasn’t properly healed.

Tali raised her head at the sound, finally glancing in my direction. Her eyes were hollow and glazed, almost as if she’d been stripped of any free will. She blinked once and, within a moment, returned to her meditations, not giving any of us a second glance.

Nadal casually raised the paw that was not crushing my tail towards the bars. Using a claw, she inserted it into the lock and turned until a soft click was heard. The door then swung inwards, the Persian releasing her hold on my tail and nudging me none-too-gently within the confines of the cell. Again I rolled uncomfortably until a rock barred my way. My eyes found the back of the Persian as she was retreating.

“You can’t just do whatever Virok says!” I cried out after her. “Don’t you have any pride?!” But Nadal merely continued walking as if she hadn’t heard me at all, or was just accounting my voice as the wind. I sighed and returned to wriggling. The ropes that bound me were very uncomfortable and I was sure would leave bruises. Not that a few more would matter.

A swift, silver flash blurred past my eyes and I flinched, my heart skipping a beat. Before I had any time to register what it had been, the ropes that bound me fell to the ground in a matted heap. When I had the time to gather my wits, I raised my head to see Tali holding out a claw, a piece of the rope still attached to it. She lowered it and the brown clump fell to the others. The Buizel stared at me blankly.

“I lost Lani.”

My mind buzzed at the words she said, the first that came from her mouth. Her voice was hoarse and dry; no hint of feeling could be traced. Had Rakai gotten to her? What had the Weavile done? I shook my head slowly in her direction.

“It…it doesn’t matter now. It was all my fault to begin with, I should have stayed away.”

“Yeah, you got that right,” she muttered in response, her eyes shifting to meet mine.

I narrowed my own. I was trying to be sympathetic but she sure wasn’t making it easy on me. “Look, I’ll get us out of this. Jarre and the others should be here soon. If Dash is as smart as you say he is, he’ll pick up on the hostility around the Missionary and avoid it. I know they won’t get caught.”

Tali merely blinked at me. “Maybe you’re right.”

I sighed. This wasn’t the direction I wanted to take the conversation in, and it clearly wasn’t helping any. “What happened to you?” I asked slowly. I wasn’t sure how she’d take it. But she simply shook her head.

“Rakai happened. That’s what.”

So she had encountered Rakai. I didn’t know what was going on, but it was clear the two of them had some kind of history. I hesitated; this wasn’t something you touched on lightly with a friend, let alone an acquaintance you just met. “Tali?”

The Buizel cocked head to the side at my call. She was listening.

“Why…I mean, you and Rakai…” I had no idea how to ask the question and my resolve wavered.

A hoarse cry issued from Tali’s mouth. “You want to know how I know Rakai. You want to know what I have to do with him?” She watched me warily as I nodded. It was a time before she spoke again, but when she did the whole room grew silent, the only sound being Tali’s voice echoing through the walls.

“It was years ago. We grew up as kids right here in the Marble City.” She sighed then with such happiness that I couldn’t be sure she was the same Buizel I was now trapped with. “Rakai and I went to school together. Neither of us liked school much; we weren’t into learning. Heh, the teachers certainly didn’t like me – I was always such a troublemaker, causing havoc everywhere I went. It was shortly after that we decided maybe we would be better suited as soldiers. As you can imagine, they were more than happy when I left for the Missionary. My parents were, too, as a matter of fact. Yes,” she answered my quizzical gaze, “I do have parents. They’re probably still alive here somewhere. I don’t keep track of them.” She waved a paw dismissively.

“So Rakai and I trained to be soldiers within the Missionary. It was here that I met Dash and Rye. They were both around my age and were training as well. But it’s strange around here; we don’t pick which unit we go into. A series of training sessions are undertaken to see which unit best suits us; where our talents lie, I suppose you could say. Rye, of course, was born and bred to be a soldier. It runs in his family line. Rakai was chosen for a band they called the Hunters. At the time, it was nothing more than an experimental group Virok’s father had come up with. The Hunters, as the name implied, were in charge of hunting down those who had gone rogue. It was a very serious job here in the city. To have someone with the kind of information you gather around here go rogue was a very bad thing. So they were in charge of eliminating them.

“Dash, being the quick witted fool he is,” she laughed airily, “was trained to be an agent. As it happened, I was also destined to become an agent. The idea hadn’t struck me as a great one, at first, but it soon became apparent that I had skills of immense use for this unit. Agents are adept at slinking around quietly and gathering information where others can’t. I guess you could say in a way we’re like assassins of the Missionary, only we don’t go around killing blindly. At first I was rather depressed that Rakai and I weren’t in the same unit. For ages I rebelled against my teachings – just as I had at school – but when I suddenly found out that I had skills others didn’t, I was amazed. So were the teachers. They praised me. It was the first time someone had ever said something good about me that didn’t involve someone else’s doing. I took to praise like a Combee to honey,” she muttered none too proudly.

“And I know I shouldn’t have let it go to my head, but no one had ever praised me. Dash was jealous before too long and it became awfully tough to handle when we were paired into partners. Each squad works in two-Pokemon unit. The pairs are chosen based on skills that compliment the other.” She paused. “Type advantages aren’t taken into much account at the Missionary. I guess, through training, you’re expected to overcome the weaknesses of battle. We were trained to face every type – not just those that we happened to be strong against, but also those that were weakest. For instance, if I ever got into a fight with you, Pikachu, I could undoubtedly hold my own and much more.” Tali’s eyes narrowed. “I know your weaknesses perhaps even better than you, yourself, and I can play that to my advantage.”

Ignoring her stern gaze upon me, I asked a question that had been nagging me for quite some time. “If you and Dash were part of the Missionary, how come they don’t treat you like soldiers now? Shouldn’t you be in their quarters, not here?”

The expression on the Buizel’s face became unreadable. “During the training I had here at the Missionary to become an agent, I often sneaked out of classes to see Rakai. He had free time when my classes were on and I always wanted to see him. For a time, he was glad to see me, too. We grew closer as friends; laughed, ran off into the city and sometimes went on missions – just the two of us – behind the Missionary’s back. They never found out what we were up to. But one day, when I went to visit Rakai, I noticed something different about him. He’d just come back from a mission with the Hunters. The Commander at the time, Virok’s father, had overseen the mission himself. I gathered it must have been very important for him to be involved, for the Commander hardly ever went on missions with other units.

“Well Rakai seemed distant, almost disturbed. I asked him what the mission was about but he said it was “classified; top secret information”.” She snorted at the words. “Rakai had always told me everything, even secrets. For him to not tell me this, well, I grew suspicious. From that day on I changed my ways. I shortened my visits to Rakai during classes until I just gave up going altogether. He would no longer talk to me about many things and I was beginning to feel like an outcast. I had more time to focus and grew much better at my training, accelerating in skill. It wasn’t soon before Dash and I had been chosen to go on our first solo mission as fully-fledged agents. With our skills, the general in charge assured us that it would be no problem.

“It was a covert mission and we were to keep to the shadows. There were rumours that Deoxys had pulled together a band of followers far larger than we had thought possible. It was our job to check it out. Pokemon from around the Missionary seemed to be disappearing – and not just rogues. Our own soldiers disappeared without a trace. Everyone thought that Deoxys had to be the one involved.”

“But that was true, wasn’t it?” I asked Tali. “No one else could have been taking Missionary soldiers like that other than Deoxys.” There was silence and a grinding sound. “Tali?”

“It wasn’t Deoxys,” she said flatly. “Dash and I found the entrance to a secret part of the Missionary. It was around the side where it was forbidden to enter. The Forbidden Room they called it. I know that even the lord’s son had been reprimanded for trying to access that room. When he came out he was never the same,” she shrugged. “Dash and I followed the tunnel to access the room. We heard voices; loud and irritable. There was a lot of growling, but we figured it was just someone fighting. We weren’t the most polite Pokemon, being soldiers, so there were always such fights going on. But when I peered through a hole at the end of the tunnel, I saw something I had never expected to see. The Hunters – mostly bred Sneasel and Weavile – were gathered around these dark beings. They were Pokemon as far as I could tell, but they were dusky grey, sometimes fully black. Almost as dark as the black of night itself.” She shuddered.

“One of these beings – I couldn’t see what Pokemon it was – took it in turn to slash each of the Hunters’ in the chest, just above their heart. Rakai was a Sneasel back in those days. My eyes instantly found him and I was terrified as the Pokemon struck him. I wanted to scream and yell out to him, even though he’d been so cold to me over the past few months, but Dash stretched a claw across my mouth and held me back. So I watched in silence as the night grew darker still and all the Sneasel and Weavile began to shudder. They fell to the floor and convulsed, crying out in agony. The Commander’s son, Virok, was with them. He was by the dark Pokémon’s side and merely watched the writhing on the ground. He didn’t help those Pokemon. I had no idea what was going on until the writhing stopped.

“One by one they rose, and their fur started to change hue. At first it was as if the colour was being drained from them. They each turned a dusky grey, their eyes becoming crimson and blank. I thought they were going to become dark Pokemon, like the one already in the room, and I bit Dash with all my might to try to save them, but he held me. Dash was such a kind soul. He held me back even though I had bitten him so fiercely. But Rakai’s fur didn’t stay that dark hue for long. In a few minutes he had regained his colour. His eyes were still crimson and dazed, but he wasn’t dark. I wondered what was going on. I wanted to go to him then, as they retreated from the room, but I knew I couldn’t. My career would be over if Virok spotted us. It took all the strength Dash had to convince me to retire to our quarters that night. I followed him, but I didn’t sleep. I couldn’t, thinking of what they had done to Rakai. I told myself I would confront him and ask what had happened.

“When I found Rakai the next day he was by the cliff overhanging the lake outside the Missionary. I went up to him and he welcomed me gruffly, as was his custom these days. I asked if he’d been on any particularly dangerous missions lately. He told me he hadn’t. Nothing out of the ordinary. I noted his eyes were still the crimson hue I saw last night and I shuddered. Rakai caught the movement and raised an eyebrow. He asked if I was afraid of anything, and to tell him whatever it was that was disturbing me. That was the kindest thing he’d said to me in so long, I just… I just cried. I cried and I screamed everything at him, saying he should have told me what went on last night.

“Rakai was surprised I knew about that. I said I’d been on a mission to discover why our own forces were disappearing and I’d come across him, the Hunters and the Commander’s son all in the Forbidden Room. His eyes narrowed and he said that they had been given a special power that would help rid the world of Deoxys. He said that the Commander was blind to everything Deoxys was doing and that his son, Virok, was the only chance we had left at defeating Deoxys, if at all. I was shocked! Not only had he been granted some mysterious power, but he was calmly mocking the Commander behind his back! It was no way to treat one of such high-stature, and the leader of the Marble City himself!

“That proved right there that he was no longer the Rakai I had known. Before all this he was always nice. He had time for others and their problems, even when he created half of them.” Tali laughed briefly but was soon drawn back to the present. “He was gone, distant. But he was still my Rakai, even then. Until…” She paused and gulped air slowly.

“Until what?”

Tali cast her eyes to the ground forlornly. “Right up until he murdered Virok’s father.”

It was like a sudden blow to my chest. The wind had been knocked clean and my mind sent reeling. “He…he what?” I asked, sure Tali hadn’t said the words I thought I’d heard. It must have been a mistake.

“Rakai murdered Virok’s father, the standing Commander at the time,” Tali repeated hoarsely. “However did you think Virok had taken over the Missionary so soon, if both Dash and I worked under his father’s reign?”

That thought hadn’t occurred to me and I was now too ashamed to admit it and risk looking like a fool.

Tali shook her head. “It doesn’t matter how he did it; I’m not going into details. But I knew after that moment Rakai was dead to the world. Dead to me.” There was a slight silence where I heard chirrups in the air, through the barred windows of the cell that held us, before Tali resumed speaking. “It was also at that moment I realised Rakai meant more to me…more than just a friend. I had never dwelled on it before but it was so clear. As clear as day and he had known it. I loved him.”

A gentle sob escaped her mouth as the Buizel wept. Her guard was down, hostility removed. This was an entirely different Tali from the one I knew, who was always cold and stubborn. Right now she was just as weak and vulnerable as the rest of us. Right now she reminded me more of myself than I thought was possible. She, too, had loved someone who had been taken from her – almost in the exact same way Rye had been taken from me. It was when we had split – that Rye and I had parted – I realised how much I depended on him. I began to grow sour and soon hated myself for it. All the anger I had within needed to be vented. And that vent would come in the form of Deoxys or Virok. Whichever I could crush within my paws first. Rakai, I would leave to Tali. That was her battle.

As the Buizel silently wept, I tried on a happier note, lowering my eyes sadly. “You know, I too have someone I can’t be with because he’s not himself. It’s very…” – I searched for the right word but found none – “…hard, I guess. I can’t tell whether he’s alive o-or dead, but… I think it’s the not knowing that’s a lot harder.” I had no idea where I was going with this. “It’s good that you at least know that Rakai is alive and well, even if he isn’t exactly himself. Perhaps one day he’ll break free from the spell that he’s under and you can be with him again. Be happy, Tali. I feel that I’d rather know – whether he is in pain or not – because at least I have closure. Without that I’ll just be miserable for the rest of my life wondering if…” I trailed off. This wasn’t the direction I had wanted to take the conversation in. I had wanted to cheer Tali up, but I guess it wasn’t working. Suddenly I felt a sharp blow to my right shoulder.

“Ow! What did you do that for?!” I glared at the Buizel, but to my surprise I found her smiling.

“Thanks, Zanna.” Then she punched me again. “But don’t you DARE think that this makes us friends! Because in no way will I ever like you!”

She snorted and crossed her arms, turning away with her head held high. My shoulder hurt and I was still glaring, but on the inside I smiled. It was the first time she had called me by name.

[continued in next post]
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  #1495  
Old 06-22-2011, 04:32 AM
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Default Re: Team StormRiders [PG-13] [Gold; Best Pokemon Author; MotY'10]

“Hey, Zanna.” I cocked my head to the side at Tali’s call. Her smile had vanished, and she was peering at me intently. I watched as she reached deep within her fur retrieving two, small, black bands. Those bands. She glanced at them with a look that seemed full of longing and sorrow. “These bands were given to me by Rakai. They are meant to harness the darkness within a Pokemon and allow them to control it. In essence, any Pokemon can use the powers of a dark Pokemon without the fear of being dark themselves. They will still retain their sanity and be able to control what is within. I was trying…I was trying to use my dark side to reconnect with him, but Rakai is lost to me now.” The Buizel lowered her head sadly and tossed the bands to me. “Here, you can have them. I don’t want any reminders of what he is. I want to remember him for what he was. Maybe you can use them to defeat Deoxys, or somethin’.”

I stared wide-eyed at the bands Tali had given me. The bands which she’d put up such a fight before to keep away from me. It was obvious that her encounter with Rakai had made something shift gear within. She didn’t seem so cold. Maybe she had come to see the fact that she couldn’t save him at this point in time. There was nothing she could do. I felt guilt in my heart at her predicament, for it was almost the same as my own, granted Rye still had his sanity. For now. Whether or not I would see him again remained to be seen.

These bands were obviously powerful tools. If what Tali said was true, and I could learn to control the darkness within myself with these bands, it could very well give me an edge over Deoxys. However there was a strong feeling of uncertainty resting in the pit of my stomach. I was a Light Pokemon. I had no idea what would happen if I tried to use these bands. The two could very well react badly and reject the other, in which case it would probably try to tear me apart from the inside out. There was only one way I could gain an answer to my question. I was sure Altair would know. Perhaps if I slept, connected with him in my dreams, he might be able to answer it. Right now it was the only hope I had left of being strong enough to defeat the legendary Pokemon.

I had hoped to gain the Missionary’s support, but it looked as if that wouldn’t happen, at least while Virok was in charge. My main priority now was to escape and warn the others, if I could, before they too fell into the same trap. Once we were out, there was a hard task I had to do. From Tali’s tale it was clear that Virok was not the Pokemon, nor father, he once might have been. He was placing the whole of the Marble City in danger and had to be eliminated. What was worse, though, was the fact he was Rye’s father. Could I do away with someone who was so important to him? If he was important to him. I knew Rye wasn’t close to his father, but they were blood all the same. If he had already lost his mother, it would kill me to take another parent away from him. But there was no other option. With Virok in charge of the Missionary the experiments on Pokemon and Dark Pokemon alike would continue. He would grow more twisted in the hope of defeating Deoxys, probably only destroying himself in the process. He had to be dealt with.

I sighed and clicked the bands onto my wrists before I turned to Tali with a sour note in my voice. “You know Virok can’t be allowed to do this anymore. You know he has to be dealt with, right? Him and Rakai.”

The Buizel inhaled deeply through gritted teeth, but her eyes told me she knew it had always been coming. “I don’t like either of them more than the next, but I wish there was something we could do. Rakai, he…And Rye, he lost his mother…”

“I know,” I replied, none too happily. “They don’t need to die, but they do need to be put in their place. They have to go. You’ll help me, won’t you?” I had never asked Tali for help before, nor did I want it, but this wasn’t something I could do alone. I needed everyone behind me, not just for strength, but the moral support to get me through. How in the name of Arceus I would face Rye after this I could not think.

The Buizel bowed her head gently, returning to stare at the bars of the cell. “I’ll do what I must. I owe the Missionary that much at least.”

~*~

Jarre hauled himself through a grate after Codan and Dash, the latter of which neglecting to help when he got stuck. He muttered irritably under his beak, but followed in silence none-the-less.

They had been in the Marble City for a few hours now, but had not yet made an appearance before Virok at the Missionary. At their moment of arrival Dash had drawn them aside. He had said he sensed something wrong within the confines of the Missionary, but could not fully determine what it was. When Jarre had questioned how he knew, the Sneasel merely replied that he had been with Tali for quite some time to know when she was in danger. He suggested they keep to the back alleys until dark and find a way in through one of the many underground passages.

Dash was now to be their leader in the expedition, and Jarre was not happy about it at all. For one, he didn’t trust the Sneasel with a single feather in his body. Two, he couldn’t be sure if any of it was true, or if a trap was laying in wait for them as well. There was nothing for it but to follow Dash and hope that he would guide them safely. Jarre snorted as his eyes caught the back of the Sneasel. He would never place his trust in him after what he did. Likely the Sneasel would do the same.

“Hold it.” Dash stuck out a paw to the side and motioned for them to be quiet.
Guards no longer patrolled the underground tunnels of the city, or they weren’t meant to, but something was clearly coming their way. The Torchic strained his ears to hear what the Sneasel did. His feathers stood on end as a scraping sound grew closer, just around a corner to their left. The footsteps weren’t heavy; it was obviously a smaller Pokemon. But it was more trouble they didn’t need. And what was worse, there were no indents within the wall to hide; so the three were stuck in the centre of the tunnel. Wide open.

Jarre crouched low to the ground, Codan towering over him. If anything, at least the Dragonite could provide decent protection. Better to provide a counter-attack. Dash stood at point, claws arched, ready for a deft assault if need be. But as the footsteps seemed to be upon them, they stopped, barely inches from where they stood. Though whoever, or whatever, it was, was still hidden from view.

“Come out, Sneasel. I know your scent; I know you’re there.”

Jarre’s eyes widened in surprise. It was the voice of a female, rasp and cool sounding. Was she talking to Dash? She must have been for he was the only Sneasel here that he knew of.

In answer to the Pokémon’s call, Dash lowered his claws and hesitantly stepped forward, ignoring Codan as he reached out towards him. The Sneasel seemed surprised himself, as if he couldn’t be sure who it was that spoke to him. “What are you doing here?” he questioned, lowering his brow. “No one has seen you since…” The Sneasel trailed off and covered his mouth with a claw, speaking through it slowly. “I mean…you were announced dead. And you just show up now?”

The female Pokemon snorted in derision at his words. “’And I just show up now’”? What’s that supposed to mean? I’ve been hiding, trying to survive in secrecy, for mostly my entire life and that’s how you greet me? You haven’t changed at all, Dash. As arrogant as ever.”
Dash’s fur bristled. “Excuse me?!” he cried out to the Pokemon, taking a step forward. “I have actually been worried about you, as hard as that might be for your pea-sized brain to understand!”

“MY WHAT?” The female Pokemon rounded the corner and glared up at Dash with a blood-red gaze. She glanced around at the three Pokemon with contempt before her eyes swivelled back to Dash. “Who are these two? I don’t see your little orange girlfriend amongst them.”

Dash huffed and raised himself to his full height, thinking how glad he was Tali wasn’t with them right now. She would have cross-chopped the little Pokemon straight to the Farplane. “Tali is not my girlfriend, and these two are friends of the Light Pokemon.” The Sneasel lowered his voice, glancing around to be sure no one else was there before he spoke. “We’ve come with the Light Pokemon to gain the aide of the Missionary.”

The Pokemon before them was silent as she seemed to ponder this. After a few moments, however, the tunnel erupted loudly with laughter. “You’re kidding, right? Even if I believed this fabled Light Pokemon was with you, Virok would have her bound in chains before agreeing to help her. Maybe not even then. Don’t tell me you’ve been away so long you have forgotten what he’s like. What he…”

“No, no, I haven’t forgotten.” Dash intervened quickly.

“Then why did you allow the Light Pokemon to come here?” she questioned. “You know what he’s capable of, so why lead her directly into danger?”

“I couldn’t be sure!” Dash hissed. “She was so adamant to come, I just…”

The Pokemon sighed. “You let a pretty face walk over you again?”

“That is NOT it!” The Sneasel stomped a claw on the ground, turning his head away from her. “Besides, Tali and a Houndoom called Lani are with her. She’ll be alright.”

Again, silence passed throughout the stone walls of the tunnel. Dash turned his head back to the small Pokemon and frowned. “What aren’t you telling me?”

“Rakai is here.”

Every hair molecule within the Sneasel’s body shivered, as if laced with ice. He cursed that name; he hated that name. It was the very reason Tali acted how she was. “Tali, she’s…”

“In trouble.” Dash’s sentence was finished for him.

“I-I have to get to her at once.” The Sneasel turned to Jarre and Codan, both of whom wore puzzled expressions. “I’m sorry I don’t have time to explain everything to you. Just know that it is not safe for us right now. Remain hidden in the shadows until you reach the Missionary, and even then. Under no circumstances are you to confront Virok or anyone else. I have to find Tali. You two focus on finding Zanna. We can meet up after that.”

Jarre looked up at Dash with a glare on his face, clearly not buying any of the words he said. “I can’t trust you, Sneasel.”

“Look,” Dash sighed. “If there was one time in your life I needed you to trust me it’s now. If you don’t do as I say we could all end up dead – or worse. Now just go find Zanna.”

“Be aware,” the little Pokemon chipped in, glancing at the other two, “that there are also dark forces at work here. There will be Dark Pokemon. You two had best take care of yourselves.” She turned without waiting for a reply and raced off down a tunnel adjacent to the one they were now in.

Dash nodded his head brusquely and followed her at a steady pace. Before long the two had abruptly disappeared, swallowed by the shadows surrounding them.

Jarre looked up at Codan who blinked once in response. “Great, more Dark Pokemon. As if one erratic Elekid wasn’t enough.” Then he cursed himself and bit his tongue, changing the subject. “Codan, do you think Zanna is alright? Did she know?”

The Dragonite merely shook his head. “I don’t know how much she knew, but I’m certain she knew something was wrong. Always taking burdens by herself when she would be better off sharing them with others.” A slight smile graced his face. “Your friend is as stubborn as she is deadly. But there’s no time to waste here. We have to find her before anything happens. We can figure out where to go from there when everyone is safe.”

“Alright. Lead the way.” The Torchic took a deep breath and followed in Codan’s wake, thinking to himself. Whatever thoughts ran through his head right now were scrambled and unclear, but… “That Pokemon…I think we’ve met before.”

~*~

It was dark within the confines of the Missionary; much darker than it had been when she left. And it wasn’t just the absence of lights that caused the thought. She could almost sense the trouble rising as a sixth sense. She was always attuned to such things these days; she had to be if she was going to survive. In all her life there was but one memory she cursed, one memory she could never forget.

The green Pokemon shook her head lithely, sliding through a narrow hallway into the dungeon. This was where her worst fears had first come to fruition. The many Pokemon that had been housed within the holding cells had been great. All their cries came back to greet her as she slinked through the darkness towards the light at the end of the hall.

Left, right, but there was no one. It was only the eerie sounds that made her shudder. She was much too wary these days, spooked. It had caused her to do accidental harm to civilians. But she could hardly be blamed for that.

As the light grew closer, brighter, the green Pokemon picked up the sound of voices from the far holding cell. Female. Two. For a moment she closed her eyes, reaching out with her mind to sense the Pokemon. They were small, and she was sure one was the Light Pokemon she had been told was here. It was madness if Virok thought he could keep her cooped up. She didn’t belong here, she was meant to fight Deoxys! The old fool really had lost his senses.

With a last step she halted in front of the murky grey bars and stared within. Two dim silhouettes appeared before her, and both glanced up immediately at her arrival. One was a Buizel, the other a Pikachu. The Light Pokemon. However, she turned her gaze to the Buizel, a spark of recognition slowly lighting in her eyes. She never thought…

“Well, well. It’s been a long time, Tali.” She opened her mouth to greet the Pokemon gruffly.

The Pikachu glanced at the Buizel who warned with her eyes to keep silent, that she was not deadly. Not yet, at least. The slightest trace of a smile played about her lips as she spoke, though somewhat coldly.

“Eon.”
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  #1496  
Old 06-22-2011, 05:34 AM
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Default Re: Team StormRiders [PG-13] [Part Two; Chapter 34: Captured]

Wooow.

How many posts have you started like that?

Not that many... >.> Lots of information coming out in this one. Learned more about the Hunters and some more of the Missionary's past. Have more reasons to totally hate Virok. Sometimes there's villains you love to hate... He's not one of them.
Tali's past hasn't gotten any better, that's for sure. Looks like she and Zanna are bonding though, kinda. ^^' And what happened to Lani?
And omigosh! Eon just shows up!? I mean, I guess I was kinda expecting it at some point since there was never any indication that she was gone, but I wasn't it expecting it there. XD

Already told you what I caught. ^^
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Old 06-23-2011, 02:39 AM
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Default Re: Team StormRiders [PG-13] [Part Two; Chapter 34: Captured]

Quote:
Originally Posted by k_pop View Post
Wooow.

How many posts have you started like that?

Not that many... >.> Lots of information coming out in this one. Learned more about the Hunters and some more of the Missionary's past. Have more reasons to totally hate Virok. Sometimes there's villains you love to hate... He's not one of them.
Tali's past hasn't gotten any better, that's for sure. Looks like she and Zanna are bonding though, kinda. ^^' And what happened to Lani?
And omigosh! Eon just shows up!? I mean, I guess I was kinda expecting it at some point since there was never any indication that she was gone, but I wasn't it expecting it there. XD

Already told you what I caught. ^^
Thanks for catching the typo, Kris. xD I almost got them all.

And uh, not many? x3 Yeah, this chapter was learning all about Tali and Rakai, and the history of the Missionary. I thought I should put it in there because people would be wondering what it was really like. Well this is part of it! And poor Rye's grandfather. ;____;

Lani, uh...she'll be in the next chapter. xD Zanna and Tali never did get along, but at least the uptight Buizel's coming around. Zanna doesn't love the idea about working with her, but they both realise it has to be done if they ever want to get out of that horrid place.

Haha, Eon! =D She finally made an appearance. Mwahahaha. Now you'll have to wait and see what happens, how she plays out with the rest of the characters.

Coincidentally...I've noticed a lot of people who read my story don't post in this thread. Lots of guests but few members. Just saying that I love people who post comments in my story, I love feedback. So if you read this and don't post, feel free to do so cause I won't bite. xD
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  #1498  
Old 06-23-2011, 04:00 AM
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Default Re: Team StormRiders [PG-13] [Part Two; Chapter 34: Captured]

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Originally Posted by Kumori Gem View Post
Thanks for catching the typo, Kris. xD I almost got them all.

And uh, not many? x3 Yeah, this chapter was learning all about Tali and Rakai, and the history of the Missionary. I thought I should put it in there because people would be wondering what it was really like. Well this is part of it! And poor Rye's grandfather. ;____;

Lani, uh...she'll be in the next chapter. xD Zanna and Tali never did get along, but at least the uptight Buizel's coming around. Zanna doesn't love the idea about working with her, but they both realise it has to be done if they ever want to get out of that horrid place.

Haha, Eon! =D She finally made an appearance. Mwahahaha. Now you'll have to wait and see what happens, how she plays out with the rest of the characters.

Coincidentally...I've noticed a lot of people who read my story don't post in this thread. Lots of guests but few members. Just saying that I love people who post comments in my story, I love feedback. So if you read this and don't post, feel free to do so cause I won't bite. xD
As my dad always says, 'almost only counts in horseshoes and hand grenades.' *nods* Just kidding. You did better than I usually do. XD So hard to catch your own typos for some reason, huh? :/

Yeah, it was good to learn a bit more about the Missionary since it seems to be playing such a big part in the story. And I know! His poor grandpa! Does Rye even know? ;-;

Why do you seem to be laughing rather maniacally about Eon meeting the others? >.>

And yeah, she doesn't bite. ..... *whispers* Just watch out for the chainsaw. XD
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Old 06-23-2011, 11:14 AM
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Default Re: Team StormRiders [PG-13] [Part Two; Chapter 34: Captured]

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Originally Posted by k_pop View Post
As my dad always says, 'almost only counts in horseshoes and hand grenades.' *nods* Just kidding. You did better than I usually do. XD So hard to catch your own typos for some reason, huh? :/

Yeah, it was good to learn a bit more about the Missionary since it seems to be playing such a big part in the story. And I know! His poor grandpa! Does Rye even know? ;-;

Why do you seem to be laughing rather maniacally about Eon meeting the others? >.>

And yeah, she doesn't bite. ..... *whispers* Just watch out for the chainsaw. XD
xD I thought I did okay. For some reason you usually don't catch your own typos until it's posted or someone else points them out, yeah.

Well Wingardom is the main capital in Talzere, and the Missionary was the defence force fighting Deoxys before Zanna showed up, so yeah, it plays a huge part. xD There's sooooo much backstory to this fic that I can't write it all here. I'm thinking that when StormRiders is finished, maybe before its sequel, I'll write a couple of one shots about the history of Talzere and such. How things came to be how they were. Just a thought.

As far as I know, Rye knows his grandfather is dead, but not the details around it. Virok kinda skipped most of 'em. >.>

Uh...I'm not? =x Nah, I've been looking forward to the next few chapters for like a year. XD It's so good to finally be up to them. I wish I could write faster, but since Uni started I've lost a lot of the motivation I originally had for the story. It used to be in my thoughts every single night, but sadly other things have taken its place. D: *sigh*

...*puts hand over your mouth* SHHHH THEY WEREN'T MEANT TO KNOW.
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Old 06-23-2011, 09:41 PM
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Default Re: Team StormRiders [PG-13] [Part Two; Chapter 34: Captured]

Hmm....at the moment all I can say is 'interesting' XD

But now there's more info about the Missionary and well I guess the Hunters, although I barely remember them for some reason...weird. Oh and now I see how Virok gained power, pretty evil to say the least.

And Jarre, Codan and Dash are on the move, things should get a bit hectic now. As for the Pokemon Dash went with and Eon, I'll have to wait and see.
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