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Creative Writing Share your fan fiction, stories, poems, essays, editorials, song lyrics, or any other related written work. All written must be your creation. Start a new thread, and keep replying to that thread as you add on more chapters. Anyone can join in at anytime.


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  #16  
Old 12-15-2010, 03:10 AM
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Default Re: Legend: Tohjo

... and chapter four.

.::IV::.

“Veneris... How can you be so sure?”

“I don’t know. Wait a second...”

“I think he’s waking up.”

Jokull twitched a little before he lifted his hand sluggishly to scratch his nose. With a great yawn, he slowly sat up, stretching, opening his eyes with some weariness. His surroundings was that same vernal forest he had been in before he fell asleep. In a bolt of energy, he stood up, ready to fight, but there was no battle to be fought; just Arezo and that girl that he saw by the river casually sitting across from each other on the grass, lightly covered in dew. It was morning, and the Pidgey were still chirping happily overhead in nests he could barely see.

“Have a nice sleep?” asked Arezo, somewhat sarcastically as she got up, wiping her jeans. “All this condensation is driving me insane. At least you aren’t frosting your surroundings anymore. You’re starting to get used to being away from home.”

After Arezo said that, Jokull grabbed his sides, and then sighed in relief. The pain was gone, miraculously, and he strangely felt more energized than ever before. Sleep – he guessed – had helped it pass. Morover, they were safe, and the fact that the pain was gone was just an awesome benefit.

The other girl stood up slowly, shyly walking up to Jokull with a fragile smile. “I’m Veneris. It’s nice to meet you, Jokull. Arezo told me everything about you.”

Arezo smiled, and then quickly turned to Veneris. “Wait a second; what’s the verdict?”

Veneris’s smile faded slowly. “I’m afraid he’s not a child of Suicune. Having ice powers, sure, there was a possibility, but he doesn’t have the same pure, healing qualities of a Suicune... Actually, it seems almost the opposite. I don’t mean any offense, by the way; I’m just trying to help.”

Jokull put a hand behind his head nervously. “No problem. The more the merrier, I guess.”

“Oh, Jokull,” Arezo said, taking off a black backpack Jokull didn’t notice she had since he woke up, “I sent Veneris to the store in Azalea Town nearby to get you some new clothes, since yours are all messed up. I hope you don’t mind.”

“New clothes?” Jokull asked excitedly, as Arezo reached in and pulled out a blue windbreaker with light blue Poké Ball designs on them and dark blue jeans. He took them from her with a giant smile and thanked her, putting the thin jacket over his white, tattered shirt. He took off his shoes, and was about to take off his pants when Arezo and Veneris turned around with gasps of surprise. “What’s wrong?”

“Um, Jokull,” articulated Arezo, covering her now red face. “I don’t know if you’ve seen other girls than us, but we’re – how to say this – very different from you guys. Can you change behind that tree over there? I’m sorry.”

“Yeah,” Veneris agreed, turning around without being able to look back. “I’m sorry, I just can’t...”

Jokull looked around, confused. Shaking his head disapprovingly, he did as the two suggested and hid behind a tree, and proceeded to take off his jeans, revealing his bare, somewhat hairy legs. Setting the old jeans aside, he put on his new pair, which felt much cleaner, and walked back, the girls still completely turned around. “You can turn around now.”

Veneris sighed, smiling as her eyes brightly met Jokull’s again, her hair bouncing when she turned her neck. She blushed, but tried to cover it up by turning around and pretending to look around at the foliage. Arezo seemed to be much better now that she finally turned around, but she still seemed a little awkward after what Jokull was about to do.

“Uh, anyways,” Arezo said, noticing some of the slight tension between Veneris and Jokull, “Let’s recap. So, we went to Medwin’s temple, you got angry, ran away, Tamesis chased after you, and we chased after him. Once we arrived, Veneris here started attacking Tamesis, and you followed suit. Medwin had transformed into his true form so he could teleport you here, and we followed soon after when the battle started to get ugly.”

“Ugly?” Jokull asked, scratching his head as he turned a bit to the side. “I guess it doesn’t matter. I’m sorry I left.”

Arezo smiled a little, and then tilted her head some. “Jokull, you were confused. We shouldn’t have been so vague. It’s just with the war going on…” As Arezo seemed to trail off, Jokull turned back to see her and then nodded.

“You might want to start there.”

“The war,” Veneris interrupted, turning back around, having her eyes intercept his. “It began a couple of years ago. Some of our kind – children of legendary Pokémon – started it by tricking actual legendary Pokémon into believing that they were their parents, and tried to duel them. Of course, they found out that it was just a prank, but by then it had already gotten too far.”

Arezo picked it up from there, pointing eastward. “There are many places in the world that have been ravaged because of this war. However, since there are places like these that are so sacred, you can see that we’re safe for now. A very powerful Celebi is said to guard this forest, and I’m quite sure not even a child of one of the Forbidden Ones would want to challenge them.”

Pausing for a moment, Arezo closed her eyes for a brief moment, and then when she went to reopen them, blue light seemed to come from her eye sockets, as a very powerful feeling protruded Veneris and Jokull. A few blades of grass – thirteen to be exact, Jokull counted – were picked off of the ground by an invisible hand only to be lifted into the air by her psychic abilities. Forming a circle, much like a clock, the blades of grass revolved as if they were on some sort of display case.

“There are several legendary Pokémon that are so powerful that they are only permitted a single child at a time,” Arezo continued, doing other neat tricks with the grass in midair. “Ten of them are from around here, but I’m sure there’s a few more. But there are other legendary Pokémon that did not agree with this law, so instead, they continued producing as many offspring as they wished. However, they already made children that weren’t nearly as powerful as they were, so they were allowed to in the end. Mew and Unown are two of those Pokémon. Medwin, who is a son of Mew, suggested we go see the children of Unown.”

Jokull nodded, starting to understand everything. “And Medwin thinks I’m a child of a Forbidden One?”

“Most likely,” Arezo agreed, as she dropped the blades of grass, and was a little further than an arm’s length away. “When Tamesis tried to analyze you, he couldn’t determine what you were because you didn’t know. Normally, that’s because you didn’t know who your parent was. But let’s say you are a Forbidden One; your DNA is secret to everyone except a Mew. But why Medwin couldn’t, I’m not sure.”

“Tamesis!” Jokull almost shouted, looking rather worried. “I forgot! What about him? What is he?”

“He’s a special case,” Veneris chimed in, somewhat happy she could speak about something. “There are people that can transform into non-legendary Pokémon. But he’d have to be either a half-breed and has a Pokémon parent and a human parent or a Zoroark parent that was very powerful. Pokémon can’t have human children on their own without special powers. And Tamesis does possess the ability to transform into the Pokémon anybody could change into before they did themselves. That’s why he tried to turn into you and failed, and then turned to me.”

Jokull’s expression snapped. “Wait a second. You’re a Suicune?”

Veneris, taken aback, stood back a little, as if mildly offended. “How did you know?”

“Not very many people know this,” Arezo said, butting in, “But legends also have an innate ability to recognize other legendary Pokémon, generally excluding the Forbidden Ones. We can recognize the fact that another person can be legends through aura.”

Perking up instantly, Veneris became bubbly again, as if she knew the answer to a question that would make her rich. “Oh, aura! The essence of every living thing. It’s the energy that helps us live, right?”

Arezo nodded. “Yep. And there’s also people that can control aura that are called Aura Guardians. Even fewer than us legends exist today, but there are probably a lot more people that can manipulate aura that don’t ever learn their powers. Medwin actually is a very gifted man that is not only a child of Mew, a legend, but also a very renowned manipulator of aura in the realm of aura guardianship. Very few are both, and Medwin is the only one I know.”

“But you just said that we use aura to recognize other legends, right?” asked Jokull, somewhat confused, clutching his head in frustration. “This is just too much to process right now.”

“Don’t worry, it becomes easy to understand after a while,” Arezo replied in a very comforting tone. “All legends start off like this. They don’t know very much, and then as soon as they start learning everything, your head starts spinning. It all gets better. But to answer your question, yes, we all use aura. Every day, matter of fact. But only extremely basic functions, such as recognition. We also use it to help us utilize the abilities we inherited from our parents.”

“You know what we need,” Veneris declared out of nowhere, pointing boldly in a random direction, throwing her chest out, “We need to ditch all this for now. So, to de-stress, let’s hike!” Before Arezo or Jokull could even raise a thought to protest, she leaped into the air and in a flash of light, transformed into the Pokémon Tamesis turned into earlier that he now recognized to be a Suicune, and started running through the forest.

“What is she doing?” Arezo asked, slapping herself flat in the face softly. “We haven’t known that girl for a day now. She’s crazy.”

Jokull shrugged. “I guess.” He tried not to show he was upset. The fact that Veneris, a new friend and – he guessed, for now – ally, knew who her parent was and could transform into her, and he didn’t, perturbed him in some way. He thought about it for a little bit, and then promised himself in his head that he wouldn’t think about it so much. Putting a smile on his face, he walked slowly in the direction Veneris was going.

“So, what do you want to do?” Arezo asked awkwardly, as if a key component was missing in the ambience of what was left of the conversation.

Jokull turned around and crossed his arms for a moment to think. “So, we’re going to the Ruins of Alph soon?”

Arezo frowned. “Why not now? Wait a second, you don’t mean –“

“Why not?” Jokull interrupted, frowning back. “She knows who she is. I’m an ice type, so I would guess that I’m weak to fire. You’re part steel-type, right?”

“I see where you’re going with this,” Arezo said reluctantly, rolling her eyes. “If we ever run across a fire type, we’re doomed unless we have a water type with us.”

Jokull started to get excited, almost pacing. “We’re just covering our bases. She’s important, too. We’ve already gotten her involved.”

Arezo started to cheer up a little with a couple of laughs. “Yeah, we’ve already taken her this far from Cerulean Cape. That’s where we had the showdown with Tamesis. I reckon he’s still out there, somewhere. But we’re safe for now, being this far away. The Ruins of Alph aren’t anywhere close to Cerulean, but it is in that direction, so we may have to be cautious, especially if Medwin says anything.”

“Oh, that reminds me,” Jokull exclaimed, looking around at the umbrageous setting, full of life and pine trees, which seemed to give off a very natural essence. “Where are we, exactly, and why are we so far away from the Ruins of Alph?”

Arezo covered her mouth in surprise and then nodded after a few seconds. “We’re in the Ilex Forest. As we were talking about, it’s a safe haven. No one can fight here. The Ruins of Alph aren’t exactly safe, and most people teleport, they can be taken off guard, so it’s very important to go somewhere you know is safe, and this so happened to be the closest spot.”

“So, that Cerulean Cape,” Jokull asked, speaking with his hands a little, “It wasn’t one of those safe places?”

“Well, it used to be,” Arezo answered, kind of trailing off in volume. “It’s not a very pleasant story, but a genuine child of Suicune was killed near there, and it so happened to rule over the outskirts of Cerulean, keeping it safe. But now, ever since... Oh, I best not talk about it. We’d better catch up to Veneris.”

Jokull could see Arezo didn’t want to talk about it. He figured now, since all came in good time, he would figure everything out; he would learn everything in good time. He still didn’t know how Poké Balls worked, and he got rather anxious about it, but what Erasmus had said kept him certain that Mauro and Arethusa were safe.

So, as noon was soon approaching, Arezo turned into a beam of red light and grabbed Jokull like she did when she saved him from the Millenium Comet at the Giant Hole, and helped him fly over the Ilex Forest, looking for Veneris and laughing along the way. Arezo was flipping him over psychically, and they both seem to be enjoying it.

But before they could spot Veneris, something caught Jokull’s eyes. It seemed in good timing, too, because he would have never had seen it if he wasn’t scanning in between the trees for Veneris. To the east, a little further down over this wide forest, were raging flames in numerous colors, consuming the trees and everything around it. One would figure that it was impossible to miss, but no bird Pokémon were swarming, yet it was growing larger by the second. Jokull did swear however, that he did see a flash of blue racing towards the flames, and he tugged at the light with curiosity.

“Arezo... you’re never going to believe this.”

~Professor Geoffrey
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  #17  
Old 12-22-2010, 12:14 PM
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Default Re: Legend: Tohjo

Quote:
Originally Posted by Professor Geoffrey View Post
Jokull was panting hard as he finally appeared near a clean, calm river clear enough to see a few fishlike Pokémon swimming underwater.
Just to be safe, you should have a hyphen between 'fish' and 'like'.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Professor Geoffrey View Post
As he sat down to rest, the dew began to freeze over each blade, a thin layer of ice formed on the water, allowing the Pokémon to continue to swim.
There should be an 'and' between 'blade' and 'a'.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Professor Geoffrey View Post
Turning into a chilly breeze was a power he didn’t know he possessed, but yet he somehow impulsively knew, as if it were a somewhat forgotten memory, as if he was a boy being chased through a forest that didn’t like to exercise.
Turning into a chilly breeze?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Professor Geoffrey View Post
As he clutched his belly to help counter the pain with his left hand, his left hand was still holding the Poké Balls Erasmus gave him.
Try not to have things like this repeat. Try "As he clutched his belly to help counter the pain with his left hand, he noticed he was still holding the Poké Balls Erasmus gave him" or something.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Professor Geoffrey View Post
Instead of slivery blue irises, they were golden, with vertical, almost catlike black slits for pupils.
Should be 'silvery'.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Professor Geoffrey View Post
His body was grayish and bony in statue, but seemed to be useful for running long distances or quick speeds.
I think that should be 'stature', not 'statue'. o:

Quote:
Originally Posted by Professor Geoffrey View Post
He now bore a mirror-shaped crest on its head, and two ribbon-like tails coming from behind, blowing south, as his new red irises moved back towards Jokull.
On his head. And also, YAY FOR A SUICUNE! 8DDDDDDD

Quote:
Originally Posted by Professor Geoffrey View Post
But when he landed, Tamesis sent back a very similar beam of rainbow energy, which the girl easily dodge with a rather acrobatic cartwheel.
Forgot the d on the end of 'dodge'. xD

Quote:
Originally Posted by Professor Geoffrey View Post
“Have a nice sleep?” asked Arezo, somewhat sarcastically as she got up, wiping her jeans.
You don't need a comma after 'Arezo' because you don't put commas before adjectives when describing something.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Professor Geoffrey View Post
Veneris’s smile faded slowly.
You don't need that extra 's' after the apostrophe, because it's not needed if the word ends with 's' already.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Professor Geoffrey View Post
“Um, Jokull,” articulated Arezo, covering her now red face. “I don’t know if you’ve seen other girls than us, but we’re – how to say this – very different from you guys. Can you change behind that tree over there? I’m sorry.”
XXXXDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD I love how you actually thought to include something like this--it's very realistic, and how would he know? xDD It's also hilarious, as well as their other reactions. xDDD

Quote:
Originally Posted by Professor Geoffrey View Post
The Ruins of Alph aren’t exactly safe, and most people teleport, they can be taken off guard, so it’s very important to go somewhere you know is safe, and this so happened to be the closest spot.”
You should have an 'as' between 'and' and 'most'.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Professor Geoffrey View Post
“So, that Cerulean Cape,” Jokull asked, speaking with his hands a little, “It wasn’t one of those safe places?”
I'm pretty sure that comma after 'little' should be a period, since it's ending the sentence.

Well, first off, I'm sorry I took so long to read this. I got caught up in other things, I guess. x)

Okay! So, first thing I'm confused about is why Tamesis chased after Jokull and then began fighting Veneris out of the blue. o: I thought they were all on the same side, and I'm confused as to why Medwin didn't stop him. xDD Also, then Arezo joined in on the fight, and on Veneris' side, yet she knows Temesis, and she doesn't know Veneris? O_o She's fighting with someone she doesn't know...against someone she does and I thought she was friends with? xDDD *confused*

But Veneris is so cute. xDDDD She sounds absolutely adorable, and she's officially my favourite character because of that and because SHE'S A SUICUNE. c: That's really awesome. xDD I love how Medwin is special though--that he's part mew and he does funky stuff with aura... Also, all the complicated explanations about Legendaries and offspring and all that... Yeah. I'm with Jokull on the whole *brain implodes* thing. xD I hope I can understand it better soon, but maybe reading over it would help. xD

I also wonder what those flames are. o: And if Veneris can put them out! There was one thing I was thinking though: when Jokull was floating with Arezo, I thought she would also have seen the flames when he did. o: I guess she wasn't looking the right way. xDD But yeah. I think it's...a bit disturbing that pokemon and humans *made* offspring together. >.< I hope it was, like...using the Legendaries' magical non-physical-contact techniques. xDDD But I understand how some are too powerful to have more than one offspring, or, at least, were told they could only have one. But I want to know who told them. o: I guess it was something they "agreed" on? o:

I really wanna show you a story I'm working on at the moment, though! It reminds me of your story...for a few reasons. Although I've only shown it to one other person before (Scytherwolf, of course xDDD), and I don't plan on posting it till, like, chapter 928490285092 because of...well, I have no idea why. I actually don't know why. But I just don't want to post it until I have a lot of it complete, and until I know exactly where it's headed and how it'll wind up. I just don't want to leave it too long so that people will come up with the same idea as me, and post that. xDDD Haha, well, I dunno...I think it's more that I want to keep it close to me until I feel I can show it to other people. Especially so I can go back and edit chapters in case I come up with new things and things I should have added. I want to post it, but at the same time I know I won't. Dx

Anyway, sorry for talking about me and my stories. xDDDD I'm looking forward to their adventures in the Ruins of Alph, and I hope Veneris really does stay with them! xDDD I also look forward to more funny and awkward moments the next time Jokull tries to get changed in front of them. By the way, does that mean he wasn't wearing underwear? xD

~GS.
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  #18  
Old 12-23-2010, 02:11 AM
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Default Re: Legend: Tohjo

Quote:
Originally Posted by Graceful_Suicune View Post


Just to be safe, you should have a hyphen between 'fish' and 'like'.

Noted!

There should be an 'and' between 'blade' and 'a'.

*headdesk*

Turning into a chilly breeze?

*facepalm*

Try not to have things like this repeat. Try "As he clutched his belly to help counter the pain with his left hand, he noticed he was still holding the Poké Balls Erasmus gave him" or something.

The second time I mean the right hand. My mistake. xD

Should be 'silvery'.

Dx

I think that should be 'stature', not 'statue'. o:

Dx

On his head. And also, YAY FOR A SUICUNE! 8DDDDDDD

Aw.... And YAY.

Forgot the d on the end of 'dodge'. xD

Darned typing errors. >___>"

You don't need a comma after 'Arezo' because you don't put commas before adjectives when describing something.

Noted!

You don't need that extra 's' after the apostrophe, because it's not needed if the word ends with 's' already.

The only exception is when it is a proper noun, however, like Veneris.

XXXXDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD I love how you actually thought to include something like this--it's very realistic, and how would he know? xDD It's also hilarious, as well as their other reactions. xDDD

I needed some of that. ^_^

You should have an 'as' between 'and' and 'most'.

*tries to find asterisked synonyms for facepalm and headdesk*

I'm pretty sure that comma after 'little' should be a period, since it's ending the sentence.

I've seen people do this in books before, it's just I'm not entirely sure about it...

Well, first off, I'm sorry I took so long to read this. I got caught up in other things, I guess. x)

It's totally fine. At least you read them. x3

Okay! So, first thing I'm confused about is why Tamesis chased after Jokull and then began fighting Veneris out of the blue. o: I thought they were all on the same side, and I'm confused as to why Medwin didn't stop him. xDD Also, then Arezo joined in on the fight, and on Veneris' side, yet she knows Temesis, and she doesn't know Veneris? O_o She's fighting with someone she doesn't know...against someone she does and I thought she was friends with? xDDD *confused*

They're still kind of confused themselves. The only way I can describe this is that Tamesis assumed that Veneris was at least a witness. In some ways, Jokull and Veneris are very closely knit together, especially since they're both very closely associated with ice.

But Veneris is so cute. xDDDD She sounds absolutely adorable, and she's officially my favourite character because of that and because SHE'S A SUICUNE. c: That's really awesome. xDD I love how Medwin is special though--that he's part mew and he does funky stuff with aura... Also, all the complicated explanations about Legendaries and offspring and all that... Yeah. I'm with Jokull on the whole *brain implodes* thing. xD I hope I can understand it better soon, but maybe reading over it would help. xD

It should get easier to understand soon, I hope. But I kind of intended my audience to be confused alongside Jokull so they can understand what he's going through, so I can sort of get away with the whole "why is this happening to me" and "I don't understand all of this." Pretty clever, eh? xD

I also wonder what those flames are. o: And if Veneris can put them out! There was one thing I was thinking though: when Jokull was floating with Arezo, I thought she would also have seen the flames when he did. o: I guess she wasn't looking the right way. xDD But yeah. I think it's...a bit disturbing that pokemon and humans *made* offspring together. >.< I hope it was, like...using the Legendaries' magical non-physical-contact techniques. xDDD But I understand how some are too powerful to have more than one offspring, or, at least, were told they could only have one. But I want to know who told them. o: I guess it was something they "agreed" on? o:

As you could guess, the flames will be explained in the next chapter. The whole thing about Pokémon and humans having offspring was actually mentioned in one of the Sinnoh myths. As for the whole "agreement," that will also be explained... eventually. And gradually. xD

I really wanna show you a story I'm working on at the moment, though! It reminds me of your story...for a few reasons. Although I've only shown it to one other person before (Scytherwolf, of course xDDD), and I don't plan on posting it till, like, chapter 928490285092 because of...well, I have no idea why. I actually don't know why. But I just don't want to post it until I have a lot of it complete, and until I know exactly where it's headed and how it'll wind up. I just don't want to leave it too long so that people will come up with the same idea as me, and post that. xDDD Haha, well, I dunno...I think it's more that I want to keep it close to me until I feel I can show it to other people. Especially so I can go back and edit chapters in case I come up with new things and things I should have added. I want to post it, but at the same time I know I won't. Dx

If you want, you can email it to me. PM me if you want it. ^__^


Anyway, sorry for talking about me and my stories. xDDDD I'm looking forward to their adventures in the Ruins of Alph, and I hope Veneris really does stay with them! xDDD I also look forward to more funny and awkward moments the next time Jokull tries to get changed in front of them. By the way, does that mean he wasn't wearing underwear? xD

Should I have mentioned the underwear? I fear that it was too awkward to mention for Veneris's and Arezo's sakes, but he does have underwear on. xD


~GS.
Comments in purple. ^_^

Anyways, I'm almost done with chapter five. Lots of work. xD

~Professor Geoffrey
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  #19  
Old 12-23-2010, 08:21 PM
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Default Re: Legend: Tohjo

'Kay. xD Hahah, I love all the "headdesks" and "facepalms", and then the one that says, "*tries to find asterisked synonyms for facepalm and headdesk*" xDDDDDDDDD

Oh, right hand! xDDD That makes sense.

Really? Proper nouns are the exception? =/ Hmm...I haven't heard that before. o:

xDDD Also, for the people doing it in books thing, wouldn't that be for continued sentences--like ones, that half some at the beginning, then they have directions or whateever, and then it's continued like a normal sentence would be after? But your speech didn't continue.

Ahh, okay...and since she was a witness, she became...the enemy? A witness to his transforming, or a witness to Jokull? But even so, I still don't see how Tamesis would want to make her his enemy. xDDD Oh well. I'm glad I'm not the only one confused, however. xD

I hope so too. xDDD Ahh, I see! Well that makes sense, and it certainly worked. xDD I guess that's a good place to situate your audience: in the same position as your protagonist.

Yeah. xDD It was more like me asking myself anyway. xDD Oh, really? Like, in the official pokemon games or whatever? Dx That's still creepy... Do they say how? I just see it like bestiality or something. Dx

It's too annoying in a PM since only, like, a page can fit in a PM. xDDD I have it posted on a site, but you have to have access to the section of the forum to read it. I'm an admin on there, so maybe I could make you you could sign up and you can read it there. o: Except not yet. :3 When I have more posted. :D

xDDDDD Oh, right, haha. Well, since he began to take off his pants (xDD) and then Arezo and Veneris asked him to go behind a tree because of his "difference" to them, I imagined that he wasn't wearing any. I MEAN--I wasn't imagining anything! DDx I assumed he wasn't. There we go. xDDD But nah, I don't think you should bother. xD I think it's just a detail I was picky enough to spot out. xD

Okay, good! I'll look forward to the new chapter then. :3

~GS.
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Last edited by Graceful_Suicune; 12-23-2010 at 08:24 PM.
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  #20  
Old 01-10-2011, 12:03 AM
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Default Re: Legend: Tohjo

Quote:
Originally Posted by Graceful_Suicune View Post
'Kay. xD Hahah, I love all the "headdesks" and "facepalms", and then the one that says, "*tries to find asterisked synonyms for facepalm and headdesk*" xDDDDDDDDD

Oh, right hand! xDDD That makes sense.

Really? Proper nouns are the exception? =/ Hmm...I haven't heard that before. o:

xDDD Also, for the people doing it in books thing, wouldn't that be for continued sentences--like ones, that half some at the beginning, then they have directions or whateever, and then it's continued like a normal sentence would be after? But your speech didn't continue.

Ahh, okay...and since she was a witness, she became...the enemy? A witness to his transforming, or a witness to Jokull? But even so, I still don't see how Tamesis would want to make her his enemy. xDDD Oh well. I'm glad I'm not the only one confused, however. xD

I hope so too. xDDD Ahh, I see! Well that makes sense, and it certainly worked. xDD I guess that's a good place to situate your audience: in the same position as your protagonist.

Yeah. xDD It was more like me asking myself anyway. xDD Oh, really? Like, in the official pokemon games or whatever? Dx That's still creepy... Do they say how? I just see it like bestiality or something. Dx

It's too annoying in a PM since only, like, a page can fit in a PM. xDDD I have it posted on a site, but you have to have access to the section of the forum to read it. I'm an admin on there, so maybe I could make you you could sign up and you can read it there. o: Except not yet. :3 When I have more posted. :D

xDDDDD Oh, right, haha. Well, since he began to take off his pants (xDD) and then Arezo and Veneris asked him to go behind a tree because of his "difference" to them, I imagined that he wasn't wearing any. I MEAN--I wasn't imagining anything! DDx I assumed he wasn't. There we go. xDDD But nah, I don't think you should bother. xD I think it's just a detail I was picky enough to spot out. xD

Okay, good! I'll look forward to the new chapter then. :3

~GS.
Lots of stuff. x3

Yeah; there's a lot of things where I decide to trust the reader versus actually describe everything. Indirect characterization, for the win!

As for the apostrophe thing, it's widely debated and confused. Some people do the whole "S-apostrophe" and call it a day, but at least with how they teach it in English, it's "S-apostrophe-S". The rule is that if it is a proper noun (i.e. Jesus, Lapras), then it is the latter, but if it isn't, it is the former.

Hopefully, with all of the exam review that has been going on and will be continuing this week, I might be able to finally finish the next chapter. I am halfway done with it, but since I am also writing an original story, a short story for a state competition, and poems at least every other day, my creative juices have been rather divided. xP

~Professor Geoffrey
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