07-15-2012, 04:01 AM
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: I...I don't know! WHERE DO I LIVE?!
Re: [WAR XI] Creative Writing Section -- Week 3 Theme Announced (Week 2 Judged)
Guardian Units of Nations
Ice Cream? No, YOU Scream.
Ricky is a dork.
This story pretty much shows just how downright CREEPY Vanilluxe is. Took some time to get to it, yes, but worth it. It's a strong Pokemon. Strong like bull. Also, note what the little girl says at the end...Evolution, yo. And what? Cherry sauce? Mmm. Except, we both know it isn't...
And bacteria in the pool? Huh. Wonder why. What could have been frozen in there and then eaten/left to rot? Hrm...
Also, Matt got karma. So did Zuko for helping Matt do all that evil stuff. Ricky and Derpy, though, were pretty much innocent. This shows the harsh, cold reality of life and death; they take no sides. You can be a murderer and live until you at ninety, or be a saint and die when you are twenty. This shows that reality. He shouldn't have followed Matt, but he wanted to keep him out of trouble.
And yes, I went for funny horror XD
OH. And bear in mind I use "-" to often show like an afterthought ("He stated that term with sheer hatred - and he had quite a lot of it." Not the best example, but you get the idea) and also, "...".
If it leads into a word that continues the sentence, lowercase. "He stated...that he...could not...continue..."
If it leads into a word that could be a new sentence, uppercase. "I couldn't help but feel it...Everything came crashing down on me."
THE MORE YOU KNOW. *GI JOE*)
Last edited by Grassy_Aggron; 07-15-2012 at 04:05 AM.